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What is forgiveness? What does it really mean?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 640859" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>You may enjoy this MWM.......</p><p></p><p><a href="http://projectforgive.com" target="_blank">http://projectforgive.com</a></p><p></p><p>I got interested in this site after I watched a video about a woman who had been in the concentration camp with Dr. Mengele during the war. She was one of the twins he experimented on. She advocated forgiveness. </p><p></p><p>The video on the site is powerful.</p><p></p><p>For me forgiveness is about letting go. It is getting to a point where the hurt has no more power over me, it has become neutralized. My experience was that it was a process of acknowledging that there was indeed a hurt, then moving through the emotion of it and then at some point recognizing that even that hurt had some meaning for me. When I can see the meaning for myself, I can let go. </p><p></p><p> I view life as lessons to learn how to awaken, or become conscious, or learn to love myself, whatever the phrase it amounts to becoming whole. I think forgiveness has a lot to do with compassion for oneself and then extending that compassion out to others, even when they appear not to deserve it. </p><p></p><p>My perceptions of forgiveness are intricately connected to my whole belief system so it's not so easy to pick it out on it's own. Personally, the first person I intended to forgive was my mother. It took me awhile. I knew I had arrived when I was aware of how much I loved her and wanted the best for her, regardless of her actions towards me. And, that the "story" I had about her diminished and in fact, ended. After her, it got easier! The latest was my daughter. I was stuck in judgement for awhile, and anger, and disappointment.........actually all <em>MY</em> stuff..........once I moved through that and took responsibility for myself, I was able to let go and forgive. Forgiveness is so tied into compassion for me, it's tough to make a distinction. And, for me, I believe the compassion for myself was necessary to forgive. </p><p></p><p>I don't exert any more energy on those people I forgave, it's over. No anger. No blame. No more story about it. No more thinking about it really. It's over. It doesn't take up any more space within me. Perhaps that's the greatest gift of all, the space within is now taken up with presence in the NOW. And, that brings peace. </p><p></p><p>I am a forgiving person, however, I do learn from the behavior of others. Its possible to forgive, have compassion and still recognize that it is not safe to trust someone. It's recognizing others limitations and accepting those limitations. Doesn't necessarily mean you want to have lunch with them!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 640859, member: 13542"] You may enjoy this MWM....... [url]http://projectforgive.com[/url] I got interested in this site after I watched a video about a woman who had been in the concentration camp with Dr. Mengele during the war. She was one of the twins he experimented on. She advocated forgiveness. The video on the site is powerful. For me forgiveness is about letting go. It is getting to a point where the hurt has no more power over me, it has become neutralized. My experience was that it was a process of acknowledging that there was indeed a hurt, then moving through the emotion of it and then at some point recognizing that even that hurt had some meaning for me. When I can see the meaning for myself, I can let go. I view life as lessons to learn how to awaken, or become conscious, or learn to love myself, whatever the phrase it amounts to becoming whole. I think forgiveness has a lot to do with compassion for oneself and then extending that compassion out to others, even when they appear not to deserve it. My perceptions of forgiveness are intricately connected to my whole belief system so it's not so easy to pick it out on it's own. Personally, the first person I intended to forgive was my mother. It took me awhile. I knew I had arrived when I was aware of how much I loved her and wanted the best for her, regardless of her actions towards me. And, that the "story" I had about her diminished and in fact, ended. After her, it got easier! The latest was my daughter. I was stuck in judgement for awhile, and anger, and disappointment.........actually all [I]MY[/I] stuff..........once I moved through that and took responsibility for myself, I was able to let go and forgive. Forgiveness is so tied into compassion for me, it's tough to make a distinction. And, for me, I believe the compassion for myself was necessary to forgive. I don't exert any more energy on those people I forgave, it's over. No anger. No blame. No more story about it. No more thinking about it really. It's over. It doesn't take up any more space within me. Perhaps that's the greatest gift of all, the space within is now taken up with presence in the NOW. And, that brings peace. I am a forgiving person, however, I do learn from the behavior of others. Its possible to forgive, have compassion and still recognize that it is not safe to trust someone. It's recognizing others limitations and accepting those limitations. Doesn't necessarily mean you want to have lunch with them! [/QUOTE]
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