What is wrong with people - So tired of women and the games.

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Star*, Feb 14, 2012.

  1. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    You know when you go to work - and you think people are being nice to you? Then you find out you've been thrown under a bus? Well how about when the bus runs over you to the point that it could cost you your job? How special?

    I have so many other large things going on in my life, I really didn't need the hassle of an inquiry or the question of my credibility with numerous people in the organization I work for brought up, but golly I work with an immature woman in her late 40's. Who openly admitted (for the stupidest reasons) she is jealous of me, and wants me gone. All along smiling at my face, supposedly helping me as my manager, mentors and giving me incorrect information, the 'hey whose going to know we all do it' bend the rules jargon, and the ultimate tattle tale - when I had NO idea what I did was wrong. She's also managed to drag another swayable mid-30's gal into her fold, and wow doesn't the party get fun from there.

    Since I've started with this company one woman in particular has made it most unpleasant to work with. She's bossy, overbearing, usurps her little bit of authority, throws her weight around. Puts everyone down, enjoys and I mean gets ABSOLUTELY giddy when she can get someone in trouble,and revels in it. I have never ever seen anyone in my life behave like they had won the lotto, or going to Disney when they KNEW THEY had caused someone to get into trouble. Cartwheels? I bet if she could do them she'd do them. She is moody, childish, sets people up, tattles about dumb senseless things that you wouldn't even think are important, and then tells you the important things don't matter to her - her standard comment "I see nothing, I say nothing." Yeah right. Well I DO nothing wrong so she's had no reason to tattle on me. She's tried to make me come at her on purpose. Waiting for ME to be vindictive, I haven't been - and it has peeved her off.

    For example - She's the safety manager - and she's purposely taken things out of my locker and placed them in various places in the lunch room. Okay - fine - I KNOW it's you - You're the only one with a key. I set a trap - twice. I Took my things out of my locker. Put them in my car. I left Aleve in my locker - Never told anyone I took it. Guess who KNEW I had Aleve? Oddly enough I was going through 100 a week? Coincidence? Not likely. She told us WE couldn't have drinks in the warehouse then had one herself the next day - Her comment - Don't do as I do - do as I say. _Really? That's mature. She picks and chooses who gets extra time on their lunches. She spends the MAJORITY of her day on the phone. (we have a no phone policy) If she's not on HER phone she's on the company phone - NOT working. When I ask her how she manages to get so much work done (being sarcastic) She said the trick is to make your people work - while you LOOK like you're doing work and not tire yourself out. Really? Um - FYI - you're not fooling anyone - EVERYONE that has come and gone talks about your lack of involvement and work. I believe two truck drivers have said to me personally they'd like to see someone light a fire under her butt.

    She used to have 6" fingernails until I made the a comment that it must be hard to work with those nails.....a month after I started there - and voila - Ever since? They have been a workable length - still very glittery, and polished - but only about 3". We HAVE to wear safety gloves - TRUST me I've been shopping there for 2 years - SHE NEVER wore those safety gloves WHICH by the way - she hounds me to death about. EVERY day - and the gloves? I'm allergic to....but even as safety advisor - she won't order me ones I can wear. I finally bought my own. She's told me it was okay to take stuff - when I knew that wasn't right, then laughed saying WHO would know? I mean it was like she hoped I would.

    So today - I get called in the office. I'm now being reviewed for "improper policy procedures" and it's serious. I'm gobsmacked. I literally wasn't sure what I did wrong - but a few days ago I left a note in the till telling the boss I wanted to buy two 1940 nickles. Next thing I know I got called in the office. I was chastised for that. Apparently this woman told the big LP guy I left a note staging the fact I was going to STEAL two nickles. WTH? I left a note to BUY THEM. OMG. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? So okay now my spidey sense is up. Then today I am told my DF was in the store - Yup, He bought a lamp - yup. He bought a fan too I said. Did he buy that from you? Um.....yup. Did he use your debit card? Well - if he didn't want to steal it - yup. We only have one. Did I ring him up? Yes - The manager told me to take over the register - and the other girl was on break. What was the big deal? I'm a manager now? Big deal was - on tape it looks like I priced the lamp FOR DF. Um.....no. We were all pricing things, I put it out - he saw it - bought it. Asked me if I liked it. I said yup it's okay - and he left. I thought I was in trouble for going outside and loading the fan. HOLY SMOKES - This woman HAD to have called this LP guy - and set me up - SHE told him all of this. THANKS a lot. She's supposed to be helping me...learn the procedures for employee purchases and or rather NOT purchases.We go through orientation,and we help each other, because there are a LOT of rules...and I mean a LOT......was she ...HELPING ME...yup helping me..get fired. ANY OTHER manager over you as a new manager would have stood there, watching and said - HEY _ don't ring that up. NOPE ---I mean shes so quick to tell me every OTHER thing I do wrong. But this? She wanted me to mess this up. Any other time she would have said HEY don't price that. Don't do this, don't do that. My other manager would have told me NOT to do whatever while your husband is here......or don't take that out.......or don't do this. What did this one do? Nothing NOPE - she stood back in the back and watched me do this and then reported it the way SHE saw it - and now I'm under review for it all.

    I'm under review for another incident SURE she also reported as she saw it - and she was the direct cause of it.....something I priced, and had DF buy ------which is NOT against policy....but they're trying to decide if the "snitching" is legitiamate. I mean I had no reason to NOT tell them what I did, and why -----it's just the way it was presented to them by her - and then to hear MY reasoning. WORLDS apart. My reasoning is to make money for the store. Which she knew nothing about. So now is it legitimate? Or is it directing? I was honest about everything I said. But being honest may still cost me my job. Either way sometimes you can't win.

    The thing is - like I told my boss today - EVEN IF - they decide I get to keep my job? My integrity was still questioned. I have a feeling that while they believe me - this woman has been on a witch hunt to get rid of me for a long time so any little thing that she's told me is okay and I've thought it was - was written down, or tattle taled......and what seemed like I was doing right - all along has been not right. Then when it all came apart - she's jumped back and said "OH I never said that - she's wrong." Well - If I do end up loosing my job- I hope she gets help, because there is something seriously wrong with a woman that would go to the lenghts shes gone to because she is jealous of me because she told the boss she spends more time with me than her now - and that's ridiculous. I do my job, and I don't socialize with anyone. If I spend more time with my boss it's because I have to ask SOMEONE I trust questions about what I'm supposed to do - because pretty much once you steal from me, and set me up once? I'm not trusting you for squat. Still I've been nice, and don't wish bad for her - but if they keep us both? I've already told them I think she's just going to keep upping the ante to try and get me crucified. I told them this is why I didn't want this job in the first place. It hurts more than anything. I've stuck up for her - I haven't said a bad thing about her - and she's gone out of her way to talk about me, and not even behind my back - One of the guys even said "Hey don't worry about what they're saying - you know you do a good job." Sheesh - how would that make you feel to know your manager had every other employee at one end of the store laughing and whispering, pointing, and then this guy comes and says THAT to you? Not likely the talking wasn't about you now was it?
    I'm not sure what's wrong with her - but I've told my boss - no matter what happens? She needs help,and ......this is it for me. I'm not putting up with any more. Trust is gone. She hasn't helped, she went right for my throat....and now I have proof. And people wonder why I don't have "girl friends" .......who needs friends like this?

    I won't know for a week or so if I still have a job - so if you have a spare prayer? I'm thinking this woman could really use them. - I'll be okay eitiher way. I just didn't know her anger, bitterness and hatred went that deep. Must be a heavy chain to drag every day. Maybe if it weren't so heavy she'd have an easier time of it. She's all the time talking about church and this and that - and I digress - I think she needs a new set of ears or a new church - one or the other isn't working for her.

    Anyway - just wanted to get it off my chest - I have so many other bigger things goin on in my world right now - didn't need this for sure.

    Thanks for listening.
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Oh geeze Star, sounds like your dept needs a major overhaul from higher up the command chain. Sending good juju and chicken dances your way!
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I hit the like button, not because I like your situation, doubt I needed to tell you that but I wanted to clarify. I liked your attitude about her... yes she is the one who needs prayers... BUT If I had a voodoo doll???? (sorry)
  4. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Buddy could hold the voodoo doll and I'd shove the pin right up its.....

    (((Hugs))) and prayers.
  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Saying a prayer and rattling beads for that good-for-nothing to get what's long overdue for her. :grrr:

    I had someone trick me into one of those "We all do it, who's gonna know?" situations at my very first job at McD's back in the dark ages. It was my second week on the job, I still hadn't gone through formal training, I trusted the shift manager who was the one that encouraged me to ring up food for an off-duty employee and then let them skip out without paying. And I got fired over it. But it's a bit different when you're 16 and don't have bills and a mortgage on the line.

  6. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    When she thought they were coming to fire me? Here comment was "Today is the day" and was happy about it.....(over heard) - Can you believe that? And yet I will be expected to continue to work with her?

    My thoughts have always been for the mission. For the greater good. I've never been malicious or vindictive,ugly to her - no matter what. I've never even gone to the boss and said - zip. Not once. I just considered it all so petty and childish - that it would blow over if I showed her what nice people behaved like. Nope.....I dunno. I guess I should polish up my resume, I have a feeling they will stick by their policy no matter what or who told or didn't tell me, or what I've forgotten. My own fault I guess, but if you work for some place like this and think someone is ever going to be nice or help? Just make sure you know on your own. Something to keep in mind..... CYOA. Even if someone says "Oh I've got yer back." ------Cause I'm guessing mine has a knife in it.
  7. Rabbit

    Rabbit Member

    Sending You Hugs. Rabbit
  8. keista

    keista New Member

    (((((HUGS))))) I'm so sorry you are stuck in this insanity. You are a much better person than I asking for kind prayers on her behalf. My prayers for her run along these lines

    Unfortunately, I've found, that in the workplace, these female dogs always seems to win, and good, honest, hard workers always loose out. Hopefully that is not the case for you.
  9. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Oh, Star that blows major wind.

    I wonder if one of my managers from years ago moved down your way............ Seriously, you described her to a T.

    Women can be very hard to work with, to say the least. I prefer working with men myself. Give me the bawdy tacky jokes and innuendos ect ect any day. Now when I told my manager to take her job and stick it...........something odd happened. I won't bore you with the story, but she found herself out of a job and arrested. Seems because she could never rope me into her games....and because I stood up to her repeatedly.....and then told her no more when I'd had enough.........Others decided they'd had enough too and were honest when the store manager questioned them.

    You never know, that might just happen in this case. I find it hard to believe this woman is liked by anyone. I find it hard to believe that she's fooling anyone with how "hard" she works. This may just be what they need to get rid of her. So this investigation just might surprise you.

    I'll be praying karma comes and bites her in a huge way. Sorry.......I'm not as gracious as you. And praying that you can keep your job.

  10. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I have an extra smartphone that records really really well if you need it. Doesnt even have to be connected to the network for it to work. Just saying.

    I also wouldnt be surprised if you actually had one of my finer meltdowns - I call them borderline moments - in the middle of the store, when you have simply had your ultimate fill that you dont find out that more people are on your side than you know. I would bet she has been behaving this way to other employees, customers, people who donate things, even venders. If people come in and speak to people above her on your behalf even a few days later, you might well be surprised what happens though I have no idea if this is a job you specifically want to keep. I dont think you have been very happy for most of your time there.
  11. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    I am so sorry that your integrity has been questioned, and by such a worthless waste of carbon too. The situation stinks to the heavens. I will happily make the voodoo doll.

    You have a great perspective on things, but you need to make sure you CYA 100% from now on. What a sad life this woman has that this is what makes her happy. You might consider getting one of those carbonless order pads in the office supply area at walmart and when you write a note to anyone, use that and keep a copy for yourself so you can PROVE you said "buy" and not "steal".

    I have a ??? for your bosses who took her complaint seriously - WHO is STUPID enough to write a NOTE telling someone they plan to steal something??????? That is just so beyond stupid that you couldn't walk and breathe at the same time because you wouldn't have enough brain power.
  12. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry, Star. Sending hugs and saying prayers.
  13. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    Sending hugs to you and keep fingers crossed!
  14. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Starbie... {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

    What IS it with some people? Women are the WORST to work with. Seriously. Up till about 19 months ago I worked in one part of Trans, and it was mostly women. It was AWFUL, the backstabbing and BS that went on. The (girl) I reported to was NOT my supervisor which was a really good thing, since she had tried the backstabbing thing before. She kept trying. And then I heard about an opening in a different part (where I am now), it was a pay cut but it has been worth it. The stress is far less. And... I'm the only female in the building... Yeah. Much rather work with guys.
  15. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sending caring hugs, Starbie. I had an awful supervisor many many years ago. She was old enough to be my Mother and always had me covering for her...and then, to boot, she insisted on sharing the most vulgar stories and jokes with me. The kind of jokes that have no punch line and are just an excuse to describe body parts etc. Yuk!

    As I read your post I got confused. This troublemaker woman is your direct supervisor in the warehouse? Where does "your boss" fit into the scheme of things? I'm assuming that "your boss" is also "her boss"? I got the impression that you trust "your boss"....was he/she part of the committee? I'm trying to understand how your supervisor could have you called up, provide no proof of inappropriate action in violation of policy and still have a chance of success in removing you from your position. Particularly perplexing is that this warehouse assignment is not your entry level job with the company.

    Unless I'm reading the story wrong I would think that a reprimand would be the worst case scenario. Then, if such a decree goes in your file (sigh) then can you request a transfer to another section? There has to be some procedure that can be used to protect your employment. What are your options? Hugs DDD

    by the way, I hope when you were called in you not only told the truth but also included something like "I have always taken great pride in my work and my honesty. If, somehow, there is the appearance of inappropriate behavior I apologize. My ojt did not include methods to use when the purchaser was a friend or relative. You can rest assured that if that was in violation of Co. policy I apologize that I did not know so and it certainly won't happen again."
  16. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    D3 -

    The woman that is being so ugly is /has the same position as me. I recently got a promotion (not wanted for EXACTLY this reason) I knew she would do something sneaky and underhanded. She is SUPPOSED to under the guidance of the big boss - the one I like be mentoring me. The big boss isn't there as much and has asked this girl to help me. We're on camera all day long/ every where we go. No biggie. I mean I don't like it - I think it's hinkey - but I've never liked that anyway.

    My boss can't do anything about this. The problem lies in the fact that the other manager went OVER her head to upper management INSTEAD of going to her, and started all this trouble. Not once, but twice in a week. So you can see my point that this has been a witch hunt. After speaking with upper management - they told me this particular incident was seen on camera. I said I'm sure it was REVIEWED on camera but I'm not dumb - A. - You had no idea WHO my husband was and wouldn't have known that UNLESS someone in my store pointed it out to you and B.) He's been in the store before and purchased items and it wasn't an issue so this had to be BLATENTLY POINTED OUT TO YOU - and I say that because it comes on the eve of someone pointing out the OTHER incident that was so petty and SO childish and I did get reprimanded for it and I KNEW who reported it because I knew who the manger was that night and it was NOT me. That leaves on other person, and I know whose been dogging me for six months, talking about me behind my back and trying to set me up all the time. DUH- (big duh) he didn't deny it - and smirked.....I'm no dummy.....but went back to saying it was the cameras. Okay - yeah you sat there and watched and so did EVERYONE else in my store INCLUDING her - who IS a manager and fact is - I DIDN"T KNOW what I did was a policy violation - SHE did - stood there and watched me do -it - and NEVER TOLD ME??????? WHY????? WHY Isn't 'she HELPING me?? WHY didn't she call me when I did the OTHER thing....why didn't she tell OUR boss instead of calling YOU????? I mean - HOW more blatent can hate be?

    Violation of company policy is grounds for dismissal - not just reprimand. And yes - I am very sorry. Because we have orientation and I forgot some rules and misunderstood another and am I sorry? ABSOLUTELY? But mostly? I'm sorry that I let my store down. The team down. I'm supposed to be this manager - and I said from the beginning I don't know enough of the policies and rules and that worried me - they said I'd be great, I was encouraged BY THIS WOMAN to take the job. I said I wasn't sure and then she turned me in. So see? She's supposed to be helping me, she's been there five years - and figured - OH well I know how to get rid of here - she doesn't want the job, I'll keep telling her YEAH you'll make a great manager - I was forced to take the job.....and I was - I took it because a kid came in who was having a baby and he had lost his job. If I didn't MOVE over to take this job - he had no job and there this couple was with no income. I felt so bad. So I said - Okay I'll try it. Then he ended up NOT taking the job - and I got stuck with this job. I dunno. I'm so embarrassed, and just over it all. I didn't think I did wrong - Lord knows you're reminded there are cameras all over the place - why would anyone do a blatent thing on camera.....? Duh again. This was just so mean. I did break policy, I know better now.......but it's too late. They have zero tolerance, and ZI'm afraid she knew that, and I didnt/ and like I said - even if I do get to keep my job? She'll take it as a huge insult....that she didn't win and really go all out to crucify me. I told them that.....and said this time it will be with money. I also told them I feared she would do something like this - but it doesn't matter.

    Yesterday - she kept trying to make herself out to be this person that has NEVER bought a thing from the store. Oh yeah right. Whatever. IF it ends up Iam let go? I hope she can live with her actions. I'll go on to someplace better I'm sure - but she'll still be her. Small minded, petty, hateful, vindictive....and talkign about people behind their back - but she will be watched on camera 24.7 -for what she did to me.....that I'm certain of.
  17. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Kiesta - (oh shame shame) that was actually kinda funny- lol. bad, but funny. thanks

    But we're really praying for her.

    And Maybe this is why I'm supposed to be there after all? We're all somewhere to be GOOD examples for everyone aren't we? I know in my heart I try very hard to be a good one.

    Janet? No - I haven't been happy there - after what I've said - now you know why. lol.
  18. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sorry, Starbie. Whether you lose your job or they retain you, I'd suggest that new Managers get full policy manuals so similar problems don't arise in the future. Taking on new responsibilities in a hurry always results in gaps of communication that can have negative impacts on employees and the strength of the Company. Nice as "the boss" is...I think upper mgm. needs to recognize the problem and "the boss" of the Supervisors is where the solutions lays or lies, lol. Policy review meetings should be mandated.

    Meanwhile I feel sorry for them because it ain't easy finding an honest, hardworking employee who believes in the mission of the Company. Hugs DDD
  19. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member


    I'm so glad to see you. However, I'm so sorry about all this "garbage!!" You're definitely a much nicer person than I am - I'll help TM stick those pins in that voodoo doll... Many hugs... SFR
  20. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    I'm so sorry and I wish I could help you more. I agree, one has to COYA. I also think that its always best to act in a professional manner in the workplace. These folks are not your friends. If you have a friend there, it is a different kind of friend and one never knows for sure.
    Never say anything inappropriate and especially NEVER ever WRITE DOWN anything inappropriate or even slightly "off." Keep conversations brief, almost always about work and anything else keep SHORT, sweet and as generic as possible. Always be extra polite to the boss. They (like it or not) call the shots and usually have A LOT to say about your pay and promotions. Again, I'm so sorry. Working with someone who is is immature and/or unkind is a big challenge. Remember, you are a strong individual and might need to tap into your spiritual faith for this one.