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What is your "true north"?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 661238" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>I've been thinking about this very thing. I recall reading a book by Martha Beck years ago, discussing these very things that was very good. Will look up R. Rhor!!! I suspect, many folks in their 50s do an evaluation of sorts of their lives and I'm more or less doing this. For me, I think, my difficult child DID help to send me in some sort of tailspin with reference to clearly understanding myself, my goals in life...my purpose, understanding what makes me happy. But, for me, it was the horrible combination of having a difficult child and health problems. I have lupus and other crummy stuff and the combination was a very difficult one two punch. In high school and college and right after college, I knew what I wanted,was an excellent planner, handled emergencies well, had clear focus...blah blah blah. But, with all the overwhelming detours, I lost focus. And this went on so long, too long...that I had trouble finding myself and although better, still do struggle at times. I've learned to be my own advocate with reference to my health. I've learned to let 99% of difficult child's stuff go...(detachment). I've learned to be happy EVEN with these extraordinary difficult things in the background, like disappointment and extreme physical pain. In fact, I've even encountered weird jealousy from other women because I think it baffles them when I appear happy and they know that I have a difficult child and they are aware that I've been sick. Some don't believe me...and that's always weird. But, no matter. Especially on days I feel well...man o man, do I enjoy them to the very max of my ability. And this summer, I'm traveling etc. with a literal suitcase of medications. Why? Because I enjoy traveling, and I'm not going to be frightened. Good food, true friends, pain free days, travel...I do enjoy certain things and I am so happy and appreciative of them. Perhaps being happy (responsibly) is what it's about in the end. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Enjoy the conference!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 661238, member: 4152"] I've been thinking about this very thing. I recall reading a book by Martha Beck years ago, discussing these very things that was very good. Will look up R. Rhor!!! I suspect, many folks in their 50s do an evaluation of sorts of their lives and I'm more or less doing this. For me, I think, my difficult child DID help to send me in some sort of tailspin with reference to clearly understanding myself, my goals in life...my purpose, understanding what makes me happy. But, for me, it was the horrible combination of having a difficult child and health problems. I have lupus and other crummy stuff and the combination was a very difficult one two punch. In high school and college and right after college, I knew what I wanted,was an excellent planner, handled emergencies well, had clear focus...blah blah blah. But, with all the overwhelming detours, I lost focus. And this went on so long, too long...that I had trouble finding myself and although better, still do struggle at times. I've learned to be my own advocate with reference to my health. I've learned to let 99% of difficult child's stuff go...(detachment). I've learned to be happy EVEN with these extraordinary difficult things in the background, like disappointment and extreme physical pain. In fact, I've even encountered weird jealousy from other women because I think it baffles them when I appear happy and they know that I have a difficult child and they are aware that I've been sick. Some don't believe me...and that's always weird. But, no matter. Especially on days I feel well...man o man, do I enjoy them to the very max of my ability. And this summer, I'm traveling etc. with a literal suitcase of medications. Why? Because I enjoy traveling, and I'm not going to be frightened. Good food, true friends, pain free days, travel...I do enjoy certain things and I am so happy and appreciative of them. Perhaps being happy (responsibly) is what it's about in the end. :) :) :) Enjoy the conference! [/QUOTE]
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