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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 706594" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Colleen</p><p></p><p>Great that you have connected with a counselor and that you already feel better. I have been going since June myself and recently reduced it to once per month as things have calmed down and I've calmed down too! It feels good for me to bounce my thoughts and fears off someone that is neutral yet educated in the field of addiction. </p><p></p><p>It is probably good that you couldn't contact him that day. I think things happen for a reason. Not much we say makes a difference anyway and they say what we want to hear - if we're lucky.</p><p></p><p>We had a FaceTime with our son last night and he looked greasy and unshaven. I don't know why he doesn't take better care of himself. By text after the call I asked him to please take better care of himself and CARE about himself. Probably won't do a bit of good but glad he isn't living with us. When he did that before it made me CRAZY. I don't know if it's immaturity or him not really liking himself or what causes the lack of hygiene. When he was a boy he used to really care about his looks and how he dressed and took time with his hair and now he is 100% not like that and I hate it. He likes nice things but you can't put lipstick on a pig.</p><p></p><p>On the upside he is working and likes it and taking one class which is very expensive since we're still paying out of state tuition but at least getting his feet wet. He really likes that too. Maybe I should count my blessings. I don't know.</p><p></p><p>I think letting go of who we want them to be is important for our own mental health and I'm trying every day to do that. It's hard.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 706594, member: 15032"] Colleen Great that you have connected with a counselor and that you already feel better. I have been going since June myself and recently reduced it to once per month as things have calmed down and I've calmed down too! It feels good for me to bounce my thoughts and fears off someone that is neutral yet educated in the field of addiction. It is probably good that you couldn't contact him that day. I think things happen for a reason. Not much we say makes a difference anyway and they say what we want to hear - if we're lucky. We had a FaceTime with our son last night and he looked greasy and unshaven. I don't know why he doesn't take better care of himself. By text after the call I asked him to please take better care of himself and CARE about himself. Probably won't do a bit of good but glad he isn't living with us. When he did that before it made me CRAZY. I don't know if it's immaturity or him not really liking himself or what causes the lack of hygiene. When he was a boy he used to really care about his looks and how he dressed and took time with his hair and now he is 100% not like that and I hate it. He likes nice things but you can't put lipstick on a pig. On the upside he is working and likes it and taking one class which is very expensive since we're still paying out of state tuition but at least getting his feet wet. He really likes that too. Maybe I should count my blessings. I don't know. I think letting go of who we want them to be is important for our own mental health and I'm trying every day to do that. It's hard. [/QUOTE]
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