What would be your punishment for this? (easy child)

[Mattsmom277]

I'm not at all for going soft on a easy child who is out of character doing this. This is obviously a young woman who KNOWS better. I would strike hard and fast to consequence, simply because she sounds like JUST the child to feel the pinch of the consequence and learn from it. I would not want to appear to her that you will let it slide, or go easy on her. Why let her get away with it, simply because it is out of character? I indeed remember my dead on fear of disrespecting an adult when I was young. It is a lost art. Since when is it TORTURE or UNFAIR for a child to have PRIVILEGE removed for inappropriate conduct? It's basketball, not University education. Its a gift to be given sports as an outlet and source of fun for a child. Not a right.

I really think that parenting is so different now. But we mostly gripe about how much it is changed (and not always for the better) in this day and age. But why? Because to be a popular parent, we let our kids be mouthy and rude simply because to punish is harsh compared to their kids parents and we don't want to lose favor with our kids? Umm, tell me to die? You've lost MY favor. Therefore you lose baseball. I love you, you wished me dead. You love baseball, I wished for my money instead of paying for your spoiled behind to go have fun. Harsh? Compared to smiling and nodding the way kids expect it today? Probably. In the grand scheme of things? Next time she'll know throw a fit and burn her own mother.

Tonight, Jessica (my easy child) was pushing her luck with me, it is UBER RARE. She's just the kid who goes along with all adult instruction. I swear, she's a poster child for parenting. But she pushed one too many times. I looked at her crossly and said ONE. I never made it to TWO. She apologized and complied completely. I have NEVER yelled at her. EVER. Never had a need. I've also NEVER had to count past ONE. Simply because she is a easy child. She knows better. I demand and require better. If I don't count, I'm okay with the banter if she pushes a bit like a normal kid. If I count, I'm passed the point of tolerance. She knows this because its always been this way. S/O was stunned. He said "That still works???". easy child laughed and said "oh yeah, mom means business if she counts". He asked her, as he has before, what happens if you ever push it to three??? She again told him she doesn't know but she sure doesn't want to find out.

Whatever you do, if you are confident it feels right, go for it. I do love your quip about being an older mom and she'll get her wish one day. Maybe it gave her food for thought

 

[BusynMember]

Thanks, MattsMum. I think so many of us are so used to difficult child's that hearing "I hope you die" from a child isn't a shock. However, my kids didn't say that to me, even my difficult child's. And my current "difficult child" is actually a very sweet boy with Aspergers who would never say that. So I was more than shocked. Sometimes I think easy child thinks I'm her friend, not her mother, and she can be PO'd and say what she wants. She did, however, express sincere sadness later and I'm sure it was triggered by whatever is going on at school...maybe a lot of drama...she hates that. However, she had a full night last night (of cleaning) and she is electronics-free.

I'll let her go to basketball IF she behaves this week. And she will know better than to not behave. But next time she's upset and blurts out anything like that, well, she's had her warning. I'll throw the whole book at her. Hub is way too soft on her, but he always will back me up regarding consequences. At least he'll do that.