What would you do?

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by jbrain, Apr 18, 2009.

  1. jbrain

    jbrain Member

    Hi All,
    I'm getting increasingly worried about difficult child 1, E. I haven't heard from her for about 6 weeks and I can't reach her on her cell phone--it just rings a couple of times and then a Verizon message comes on and says, "the Verizon customer you are trying to reach is not available at this time. Please try your call again later."

    The last time we spoke she called me and we had a nice conversation, no big news or anything weird, nothing "off."

    What makes me worry is that she never called for her sister's birthday on March 24th and that is usually a big deal to her--especially with sister turning 18 this year. Also, she likes to call and update me about the baby--the things he is doing.

    I don't know where she lives or her friends' names or phone numbers. The only number I could call is where she has been working (the strip club). I could ask them to ask her to call me collect because I haven't heard from her. The thing that scares me about this is that I am afraid I'll find out she isn't working there anymore and then I'll be even more worried but will have no way to find out where she is.

    Probably the most logical explanation for her not calling and me not being able to reach her is that she is back with the boyfriend and doesn't want me to know. But, as you can imagine, I have all sorts of awful thoughts go through my head about what could have happened to her. One thing, she had to be fingerprinted for her entertainer's license, so at least I know if her body showed up somewhere she could be traced back to us.

    Any thoughts on what you would do if you were me?

  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    If I were to give you sage advice, I'd say don't do anything. She doesn't live at home anymore. You don't support her.

    If I were to tell you what I'd do, despite my sage advice, I'd call the club.

  3. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I'm with Terri. I'd call the club. I'd probably also do a search for her in MySpace or Facebook. I did that with M when I had no idea where he was. I didn't always like what I found, but I knew he was alive and not in jail.
  4. Wishing

    Wishing New Member

    My difficult child son is almost 19 if I don't here from him in 4 hours I usually call him and he usually calls me back.
  5. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Jane, I'd call the club, too. This isn't a detachment thing. This is your daughter and worrying about her safety. It's different.

  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Call the club Jane. And if it were me.........if she isn't working there and no one there can give you any insights........File a missing person report with the police. It's a dangerous job.

    This is beyond detachment. This is her safety and welfare. Whole different ball of wax. I did it to K with she up and moved out of town without bothering to tell anyone. I found her the next day.....went out hunting her down myself (cops are too slow for me). The relief when I found her and the kids safe was enormous. Then the mad set in and I bawled her out.

    Saying a prayer she is safe and just being forgetful.

  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Another vote for calling the club. Lisa has several good points.

    Saying prayers that she's OK.
  8. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Call the club. At least if she's still there, that will ease your mind.
  9. standswithcourage

    standswithcourage New Member

    I agree - I would call the club. At least they may be able to tell you when she was in there and how things were going. I am sure she will call you.
  10. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    Given the fact that she missed her sisters birthday - I'd be seriously concerned too.

    Yup - I'd call her workplace.

    I'm so sorry - what a terrible worry.