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When they truly seem to just not care...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 640624" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi from my hotel in Chicago for Thanksgiving.</p><p></p><p>I think IC and whoever else (forgot...so sorry) mentioned Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)/Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) a has very good possible cause. Bio. mom likely used drugs and drank during her pregnancy. From this comes brain wiring and connection problems that are not the child's fault and can not be cured. They are organic in nature. Not understanding easy things is one symptom.</p><p></p><p>Attachment disorder is another huge possibility. The heart and soul is torn out of these kids from early deprivation and loving them later on does not eradicate that. It takes often years of attachment/bonding specific therapy. Even then, there is no guarantee and difficult child is kind of old for this sort of therapy and possibly unable to understand it.</p><p></p><p>But the actual point was made by Recovering Enabler. If she is a threat to your or anybody or anything alive in your home, it would be very risky to allow her to live with you. She needs outside help, which social services can provide. We have to remember that we and our othe loved ones are as precious as our grown childen who are "different." We need to love and care for ourselves and our well behaved loved ones and our innocent pets as much as we care for and would like to help those whom we love who are dangerous to them. If we don't, the consequences are often even more far reaching than trying to get outside services and a new residence for that one damaged love one. Sometimes we even have to allow them homelessness...it is of course a last resort for most.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I wish you luck and hope you can find a solution to this. You can not control her even 1%. Only she can make herself better unless she is truly brain damaged. If so, she needs perhaps assisted living or a group home...where she can be watched all the time. This one could harm your very young ones.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your hurting heart.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 640624, member: 1550"] Hi from my hotel in Chicago for Thanksgiving. I think IC and whoever else (forgot...so sorry) mentioned Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)/Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) a has very good possible cause. Bio. mom likely used drugs and drank during her pregnancy. From this comes brain wiring and connection problems that are not the child's fault and can not be cured. They are organic in nature. Not understanding easy things is one symptom. Attachment disorder is another huge possibility. The heart and soul is torn out of these kids from early deprivation and loving them later on does not eradicate that. It takes often years of attachment/bonding specific therapy. Even then, there is no guarantee and difficult child is kind of old for this sort of therapy and possibly unable to understand it. But the actual point was made by Recovering Enabler. If she is a threat to your or anybody or anything alive in your home, it would be very risky to allow her to live with you. She needs outside help, which social services can provide. We have to remember that we and our othe loved ones are as precious as our grown childen who are "different." We need to love and care for ourselves and our well behaved loved ones and our innocent pets as much as we care for and would like to help those whom we love who are dangerous to them. If we don't, the consequences are often even more far reaching than trying to get outside services and a new residence for that one damaged love one. Sometimes we even have to allow them homelessness...it is of course a last resort for most. I wish you luck and hope you can find a solution to this. You can not control her even 1%. Only she can make herself better unless she is truly brain damaged. If so, she needs perhaps assisted living or a group home...where she can be watched all the time. This one could harm your very young ones. Hugs for your hurting heart. [/QUOTE]
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When they truly seem to just not care...
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