everywoman
Well-Known Member
Okay---I hope this comes out right---I really need some advice but it is really for Jana.
She and boyfriend of 10 months broke up last weekend. She is a little firecracker, he is very, very traditional. Although husband and I really liked him, and are saddened that it didn't work out, it obviously was not a good match for her, and we know she is doing what she needs to do. She has been raised by me, and she is as strong and independent as I am. She has also grown up with a difficult child for a brother and a father who is/has been an addict for most of her life, and is now in semi-recovery. She is not going to put up with anyone who is controlling, and it is becoming more and more obvious since the break-up that exbf is very controlling.
She has not answered a text or a phone call since Sunday---she is still receiving multiple texts and voice messages daily. He has messaged me, called her dad, called her co-worker, and today stopped by her office get a quote for insurance on a house he is "thinking " of buying. She doesn't know what to do to get him to leave her alone.
Jana is a paradox. She is opinionated, but she doesn't like confrontation. She is a brat---and likes to have her way----only girl and has always been treated like a princess by husband and I, but is also very giving and loving. She can be very hateful at times, especially when she has had enough, and will tell someone exactly what she thinks, but hates to hurt anyone's feelings. In fact, boyfriend broke up with her, but I know her well enough to know that she manipulated him to do it by her words and actions, so she wouldn't be the bad guy in the breakup.
And, please tell me...is this the norm after a breakup? Every single guy she has ever dated seriously has done this exact same thing with her. Is it the guys she's choosing---I can't imagine that every single one of them were so attached that when the relationship was obviously over they couldn't let go, but that is what it seems to be...and although I love her and think she is adorable, she is just your average, everyday kind of girl.....What could she be doing to make a guy behave this way? Or is this normal for guys?
She and boyfriend of 10 months broke up last weekend. She is a little firecracker, he is very, very traditional. Although husband and I really liked him, and are saddened that it didn't work out, it obviously was not a good match for her, and we know she is doing what she needs to do. She has been raised by me, and she is as strong and independent as I am. She has also grown up with a difficult child for a brother and a father who is/has been an addict for most of her life, and is now in semi-recovery. She is not going to put up with anyone who is controlling, and it is becoming more and more obvious since the break-up that exbf is very controlling.
She has not answered a text or a phone call since Sunday---she is still receiving multiple texts and voice messages daily. He has messaged me, called her dad, called her co-worker, and today stopped by her office get a quote for insurance on a house he is "thinking " of buying. She doesn't know what to do to get him to leave her alone.
Jana is a paradox. She is opinionated, but she doesn't like confrontation. She is a brat---and likes to have her way----only girl and has always been treated like a princess by husband and I, but is also very giving and loving. She can be very hateful at times, especially when she has had enough, and will tell someone exactly what she thinks, but hates to hurt anyone's feelings. In fact, boyfriend broke up with her, but I know her well enough to know that she manipulated him to do it by her words and actions, so she wouldn't be the bad guy in the breakup.
And, please tell me...is this the norm after a breakup? Every single guy she has ever dated seriously has done this exact same thing with her. Is it the guys she's choosing---I can't imagine that every single one of them were so attached that when the relationship was obviously over they couldn't let go, but that is what it seems to be...and although I love her and think she is adorable, she is just your average, everyday kind of girl.....What could she be doing to make a guy behave this way? Or is this normal for guys?
