In preparation for my knee surgery next Monday, January 9th, I have had to discontinue all my supplements and any NSAIDs or blood thinning type of pain relievers. OH.MY.GOD. The pain is horrible. I didn't think the celebrex was helping, but after five days without it? My entire body aches, every joint, my back is beginning to give me trouble again because my gait is off again. It totally svcks! Can't walk, can't clean, can't stand too long, can't sit too long, can't do much of anything for long. And the worst part is because I'm a person who 'presses on' and just suffers through it, no one seems to believe me that I'm in agony! Last night H took me with him to buy long underwear at Burlington Coat Factory. I brought a cane with me. I have the handicap tag, remember? He parks four rows in, I flip out and made him move to a closer spot aka, a handicap spot! Hello? He asks me, 'are you really going to use your grandpas cane?' ummmm, stupid me felt embarrassed so I left it behind. I'm buying myself a pretty cane today-I'll need it anyway post surgery. Jesus, I can't believe I felt embarrassed to use something I clearly need! And what is wrong with H? This morning he told me I look like an old person. I was sitting in the chair I borrowed from my office-it has arms that I can practice some PT on, very helpful. What?! Old person?! Jerk! When I say I can't clean the shower, carry the laundry basket, mop, bathe the dogs, walk through stores...it's killing me because I WANT to do all those things, I want to be CAPABLE. Even taking the dogs out hurts. And I'm suddenly so damned tired, like exhausted tired by dinnertime. We have the Aretha Franklin show tonight-how am I going to make it? Thanks for letting me vent.