Will anyone listen if I whine a bit?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by hearts and roses, Dec 30, 2011.

  1. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    In preparation for my knee surgery next Monday, January 9th, I have had to discontinue all my supplements and any NSAIDs or blood thinning type of pain relievers.

    OH.MY.GOD. The pain is horrible. I didn't think the celebrex was helping, but after five days without it? My entire body aches, every joint, my back is beginning to give me trouble again because my gait is off again. It totally svcks! Can't walk, can't clean, can't stand too long, can't sit too long, can't do much of anything for long.

    And the worst part is because I'm a person who 'presses on' and just suffers through it, no one seems to believe me that I'm in agony! Last night H took me with him to buy long underwear at Burlington Coat Factory. I brought a cane with me. I have the handicap tag, remember? He parks four rows in, I flip out and made him move to a closer spot aka, a handicap spot! Hello? He asks me, 'are you really going to use your grandpas cane?' ummmm, stupid me felt embarrassed so I left it behind. I'm buying myself a pretty cane today-I'll need it anyway post surgery. Jesus, I can't believe I felt embarrassed to use something I clearly need! And what is wrong with H? This morning he told me I look like an old person. I was sitting in the chair I borrowed from my office-it has arms that I can practice some PT on, very helpful. What?! Old person?! Jerk!

    When I say I can't clean the shower, carry the laundry basket, mop, bathe the dogs, walk through stores...it's killing me because I WANT to do all those things, I want to be CAPABLE. Even taking the dogs out hurts.

    And I'm suddenly so damned tired, like exhausted tired by dinnertime. We have the Aretha Franklin show tonight-how am I going to make it?

    Thanks for letting me vent.
    Last edited: Dec 30, 2011
  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I've listened. Wish I had some words of wisdom or comfort for you. Crossing my fingers that Monday comes quiclkly and you will know that better times are on the horizon. Regarding your husband...no, lol, I won't comment in detail. Simply put (you knew I couldn't resist, didn't you?) he's acting like a spoiled baby. Sure hope you have arranged for help during your recovery as I doubt he will step up to the plate. Hugs. DDD
  3. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thanks DDD. I think H is choosing denial as his coping mechanism, as I believe he is scared. I have a friend lined up and difficult child and easy child will help me. Honestly, I don't want H to stay home with me all that much, but I will need someone for the first two weeks at least.

    Is it par for the course that the hospital told me to bring a copy of my living will and advanced medical directives. That kind of scares the you know what out of me!
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Try not to tough through it so much. (I know, I'm one of them who does that too) I know it's not easy to do but really, without your normal medications you're just making it worse by trying to do even the stuff you normally do, and once that pain level gets going it can be tough to bring it down again. So in my opinion, it's just not worth it. Know what I mean?? If an activity is really painful then stop and have someone else do it.

  5. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sorry for your pain. It will end soon!! Stay put and don't do anything until surgery.
  6. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    Am sorry Jo - It hovers to be in a lot of pain and not being able to do anything when you are used to be able to easily handle doing it all. I don't do "sick" very well -don't even like to think about feeling bad or acknowledge I don't feel well - admitting I now have limitations is irritating to me LOL.

    Pretty soon you will be back to normal - keep your eye on the goal of Monday. You will come thru it like a champ

  7. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Listening and commiserating. I know it must seem awful but sounds like you're being proactive in taking care of yourself by doing the surgery. Can you just let go a little bit and treat yourself in some way? A manicure? A new book? I know when I'm in pain from an injury, I'm like a wounded animal: frustrated to the point of tears and very hard on myself, and tired a depressed as well. It does sound like a temporary situation; can you allow yourself a little self-kindness? I'll bet you know how to be kind to everyone else BUT yourself...just guessing here;-)

    Good luck with your surgery and I hope you'll be back to your capable, energetic self in no time.
  8. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Super gentle hugs to some part of you that's not hurting. I understand... And yep, I'm listening too sweetheart!
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Jo....you should still have some of your vicodin left. You can take them. They arent NSAIDS. They have tylenol in them.

    As far as the aretha franklin show, Please go rent a wheelchair. You will need it for the first week or two after the surgery anyway and you might as well enjoy the show. If you show up in the wheel chair they will give you very good seats where you dont have to climb and can park that chair without being all out in the bad sections. Trust me, I use my wheel chair quite a bit. You can rent a chair at any medical equipment store. Or simply buy one. They really arent that expensive.
  10. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    1) the good news is, the pain NOW sets a threshold for after surgery - and makes THAT pain level easier to take.
    2) Get off your feet. Extra sleep, Hot baths. Dress warmly. Being cold really increases the pain.
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    oh...IC does have a point. one thing I do for my joint pain when it gets really bad is take hot baths.

    This is my "recipe". I take a really hot bath with 1 16 oz bottle of hydrogen peroxide poured in it and 2 cups of epsom salts. The bath should be as hot as you can deal with it. soak for at least 20 minutes. You can put a few drops of bubble bath or essential oil in there to make it smell nice. When you get out, towel dry and immediately go lay down in bed because you will be really tired and feel like you are ready to sleep. It has taken the impurities out of your system.

    Try it.
  12. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    I use a heat pack that gets heated in the microwave. It helps me tremendously. Hot baths, too.
  13. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Well just got back from the store...bought my new pretty cane, purple with flowers, very cute. I'll take it with me tonight.

    Thank you for the support, it's much appreciated! I'm sure everyone is sick of hearing about it and will love the four days I'm out of commission in the hospital. Lol
  14. buddy

    buddy New Member

    My neighbor uses these....not super cheap but if you pick and choose and it is only till the surgery after which you can use your medications again??????

    HUGS, pain is really no fun (stating the obvious, sorry) but chronic pain can bring us down so fast. Hold on to the bright future after surgery and being able to use your medications.... Thinking of you...
  15. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Sending hugs and prayers, Jo.
  16. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    I'm listening too, and sending many hugs.

    I'm glad to hear that you bought yourself a pretty cane. It sounds lovely and it really does help keep you cheerful. I was on crutches once over the Christmas holiday when I was in university, and I decorated them with gift-wrap ribbon and tinsel. Cheered me up a lot.
  17. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thanks Trinity! I went to the concert tonight and left my cane in the car-big mistake! I was embarrassed and shouldn't have been as I had to climb a bunch of stairs and really could have used it! You made me feel better. I will use it tomorrow!
  18. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member


    When Mom was waiting for her surgery, the doctors told her "act your age now, and don't feel guilty... you won't be able to do that after the surgery"...

    And she did... she went from "a really old lady" to... at least 30 years younger... in about 2 weeks (after surgery).

    So... get pampered, take all the "breaks", and don't feel one bit guilty.
  19. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    That's how it was with my sister! Thank you all for the uplifting and optimistic thoughts!
  20. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    If you have not watched the British comedy "Waiting for God", this is the time to do so. I know that netflix has 3 seasons and it is shown by some PBA stations. That woman can teach you how to use a cane, LOL~ She walks with one but also uses it quite creatively, lol.

    I am sorry you are in such pain. You really MUST stop doing things unitl the surgery (DJ is right about vicodin being codene plus tylenol) but check wth the dr first on it. Do NOT be ashamed of crying because it hurts. LET THE TEARS FLOW!! They not only show people how bad things are, they also get toxins out of your system.

    With difficult children we have to figure out a way to show the docs how our angelic little kids are hiding the horns and tails and really ARE doing gfgstuff.

    Your H is pretty well trained to have you do just about everything and who likes more chores? So now he is just upset and, as DDD so eloquently putting it, he is acting like a spoiled baby.

    go to work if you MUST, otherwise, stay HOME. Keep that knee UP - not just on a stool, ottoman etc while you are in a chair. Keep it up ABOVE the level of your heart. EVERY single minute you are home except to potty and do basic things. If H won't do meals for the 2 of you for a month-6weeks, then you pack up a small thermos with whatever you want to eat THAT DAY and you spend that day with the knee UP until the surgery and after until the docs say you can move around alone.

    I am sorry that H is so unsympathetic.

    As for Aretha, get that wheelchair and then find a good friend and take her/him instead of H!