Won't do school work and skips school

R

robin5kids

Guest
We are so tired of this behavior. We have been dealing with this kind of behavior since our son was 3 and now he is 13! He refuses to get up for school, because he is too tired or because he has not done his homework. When this happens he makes everyone late for work and school. Today it happened again and my husband had to leave without him. It is not like we can carry our 13 y/o to the care. So he did not go to school today and instead stays home and sleeps in till 11. He had a paper that he had to correct for school, but he hates writing and even after I sat down to help him, he could not do it. He called me stupid and the teacher stupid. That is when i got up and walked away. We are so tired of our home being run by a child. For years we and the other children tip toed around afraid to "tick" off our ds. Now my younger 2 children are starting to have a few issues which we think is a result of the behavior they have witnessed for so many years.
Ds will have rages in which he screams and yells. He NEVER will admit that he did anything wrong at any time. It is always, "Well they got in my way, or If the teacher did not assign that work, then I would not have done that., or She started it, so that is what happens." We are afraid of the future. He just is not capable of handling any school work, or work for that matter. Anything that he does not want to do he will avoid. He will look straight at us and lie and tell us he did something when he has not. There is no getting him to do it either.

We have tried a few counselors, but it was a waste of time. We feel like there is no help out there till something really bad happens and then it is too late. I am ashamed to say that I never want to be around him. Even when he is being "good" all i can think about is what he has done in the past or what he could do at the drop of a hat. How can i not want to be with my ds?
 

Snowenne

New Member
Have you ever tried any kinds of medications? I know alot of people are anti-medications but in some cases you dont really have a choice. Not only should the drugs calm him down a little it will make him feel alot better because hes not so anxious.
My son is 8 and we are having severe issues with him. We have tried to help but hes refusing. So hopefully on thursday we can get him medicated for his anger.
 

keista

New Member
Has your son ever had any kind of psychological or psychiatric evaluations done? Or even schol evaluations for learning disabilities? If not, call an make an appointment today. Counseling and or therapies take a lot of time, but you also have to have a good "fit" where your son would be responding and participating. From your short description, I see how that would be very difficult to achieve.
 

Marguerite

Active Member
A neuropsychologist evaluation could pinpoint the problems he is having and make it clear that this is not just a wilful child, but a child with identifiable difficulties which can be helped or supported. From the child's point of view, once they find out about the possibility that it is not that they are stupid, but that there is a good reason for having this problem or that, they can turn around and begin climbing back up towards trying to overcome the problems.

Marg
 
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