Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mog, Jan 31, 2010.

  1. mog

    mog Member

    Thanks to all who posted about difficult child's attack. He refused to go to the Doctor he says he is fine. I am worried though today he is very depressed and does not want to talk or even be around me. I know that he is worried about tomorrow but this isn't helping him any. UGH I hate feeling so helpless and alone. I wish I knoew what to say to him to make him feel better and safe that he is going to stay at home but I don't know it for sure. I have learned that his JPO does not tell the truth, and does not have the "courage" to tell me himself that he is a coward and has someone else "RAT" on difficult child for any minor thing he does. So many wrong things go on in the world today but it is our difficult child's that get the short end of it all. Kids, teens and adults for awful things that go unpunished but if difficult child is late to one class all HE!! hits the fan. Its not fair and I am so tired of fighting with him to fight FOR him. It has been a really rough day and I am here alone worried out of my mind.
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    mog, what precautions are being taken at school tomorrow to protect your difficult child? Are you accompanying him tomorrow to school to make sure he is kept safe by school officials?
  3. mog

    mog Member

    We have a meeting in the morning but other than that I don't know. I was told that there is a warrant out for the arrest of the 1st guy that was bullying him but the others i'm not sure. When I left on Friday it kinda sounded to me like the asst. principal was trying to blame difficult child for agreeing to meet with him to talk things out. I do not know what tomorrow brings!!
  4. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    take a deep breath. You are not doing yourself any good. difficult child is going to feel your stress and it's going to make him more anxious than he already is. The last thing that needs to happen is for both of you to show up stretched tight in the morning.

    Resolve to go to the meeting tomorow with a plan. If you are not satisfied that they are going to keep difficult child safe, if your gut says it just feels wrong, take him home. Make sure difficult child understands that you will do everything you can to make sure he is protected.

    We are here to help you move forward. Keep us posted.

  5. mog

    mog Member

    The problem is that the judge already told difficult child that he can not miss any school and I feel like I have no choice but to leave him there even though I feel that they are NOT watching what happens to him. difficult child is at church now but he has even done his homework--I think that he feels like when we go to court tomorrow he is not coming home and I can't reasuure him that he is because I dont know that myself for sure. I explained that I had the church representative write a letter how well he is doing since he came home. the lady in charge of his braclet sadi she was going to make sure that the JPO knew he was doing well. I am asking his behavior counselor in the morning to write a letter but like I said earlier I don't trust the JPO and worst of all it is just me and difficult child I have no back up -- sometimes I wish I had money to either pay them all off so difficult child would be ok or move to new fresh start for him.
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    mog, I too have had (and continue to have) issues with things people in our juvenile court system have handled things and resulting ability to trust them. For us, it has made some difference depending on how we each "appear" to the judge in court.

    First, it's not clear to me but I think you are saying your son has to appear in court tomorrow due to this situation of him being jumped at school? Is that the case? If so, this is not a case where he is being charged- just make sure you both use body language and words that indicate he did nothing wrong- not cocky or having an attitude, just innocent and making sure it's obvious that he's the victim in this case.

    To me, and most people with common sense, there is a big difference between two guys around the same age and size getting into a fight (albeit that still can't be condoned) and someone (anyone) being jumped, held down, and then filmed. That says a lot in itself.

    PM me if you want- I've gone thru some really sticky situations with PO's (what you're refferring to as JPO), GAL, and others in our legal system.