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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 688843" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Sherril. I remember you and your son very well. I am glad you are back with us and I hope you stay. Of course I wish this was not happening.</p><p></p><p>I will tell you what I think: the actions of the court are between the judge and your son. The consequences for his crimes between the State and your son. There is no place for you here. Hoping for either one thing or another.</p><p></p><p>I live in an area where there is a lot of gang activity, especially with the Latino community, of which I am a part. In our extended family almost every male has been to jail and typically prison. At minimum serious drug use was involved.</p><p></p><p>These kids, every one of them I can think of, have turned their lives around. They become responsible fathers and maybe, husbands. They work.</p><p></p><p>But their mothers have nothing to do with it. Usually it is prison that scares them, these kids. I have written before that 27 or 28 is usually a turning point.</p><p></p><p>Now is the time to let this go and let your son live the life he has decided upon. Whether or not he stays confined and what his sentence is, has nothing to do with you.</p><p></p><p>This is time for you to work on your focus, which is not your son. Like says COM, it is time for you. Your son will or will not work this out, and will learn sooner or later.</p><p></p><p>Let me add one thing. It sounds like your son is in dangerous, criminal activity pretty deep, likely with a gang. He may well be selling serious quantities of drugs, and/or doing more. I would decide right now what limits I want with respect to contact with him should he receive bail. We have had family members' homes and cars shot at. This is not play.</p><p></p><p>Closing, I am sorry you are suffering this. And slightly peeved at your son. You went to bat for him, and he could not care not even a bit. (Is he the kid that said he was on the lamb--and was never coming back? Wasn't he in San Diego? Or was that some other poor Mom's kid. I think I remember your kid with lip. What an idiot. I am sorry.)</p><p></p><p>Why not stay with us this time? I hope you keep posting. Take care.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 688843, member: 18958"] Sherril. I remember you and your son very well. I am glad you are back with us and I hope you stay. Of course I wish this was not happening. I will tell you what I think: the actions of the court are between the judge and your son. The consequences for his crimes between the State and your son. There is no place for you here. Hoping for either one thing or another. I live in an area where there is a lot of gang activity, especially with the Latino community, of which I am a part. In our extended family almost every male has been to jail and typically prison. At minimum serious drug use was involved. These kids, every one of them I can think of, have turned their lives around. They become responsible fathers and maybe, husbands. They work. But their mothers have nothing to do with it. Usually it is prison that scares them, these kids. I have written before that 27 or 28 is usually a turning point. Now is the time to let this go and let your son live the life he has decided upon. Whether or not he stays confined and what his sentence is, has nothing to do with you. This is time for you to work on your focus, which is not your son. Like says COM, it is time for you. Your son will or will not work this out, and will learn sooner or later. Let me add one thing. It sounds like your son is in dangerous, criminal activity pretty deep, likely with a gang. He may well be selling serious quantities of drugs, and/or doing more. I would decide right now what limits I want with respect to contact with him should he receive bail. We have had family members' homes and cars shot at. This is not play. Closing, I am sorry you are suffering this. And slightly peeved at your son. You went to bat for him, and he could not care not even a bit. (Is he the kid that said he was on the lamb--and was never coming back? Wasn't he in San Diego? Or was that some other poor Mom's kid. I think I remember your kid with lip. What an idiot. I am sorry.) Why not stay with us this time? I hope you keep posting. Take care. [/QUOTE]
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