Worst day of school

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Wiped Out, May 4, 2009.

  1. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    this year for difficult child. I received a call this morning and then an e-mail. Here are the "highlights"

    *Threatened teacher "I'm going to beat you up little girl." along with threatening gestures and stuck his tongue out at her. He threatened this because she was redirecting him to sit down and quiet down.

    *Drew with whiteout on a teacher's box.

    *Shoved a student 2x (says other student was antagonizing him but no evidence of this).

    *Tried to budge in line at the waffle maker (some special treat thing going on). Other student got upset that difficult child was doing this and told him to knock it off and said a few other things to difficult child. difficult child shoved him and started yelling back.

    *She separated the two (put other child in the hallway) and case manager asked difficult child to have a seat. He refused and then ran up to her and shoved her hard (she was still sore) and called her a b**ch. He threatened again to beat her up.

    *At that point she told him he needed to go because he wasn't being safe. He refused so she went to get help. While she was gone (other staff was in the area) to get support the other child went up to the waffle maker and difficult child started to antagonize him again (according to other staff). The other child may have said things back. difficult child punched him repeatedly (interesting because the other child was much bigger) and the other child punched difficult child back.

    *Shoved another child in reading class.

    I asked if he had a strange look in his eyes during any of this, and she said yes he did. She said they had never seen difficult child like this or even close to this the entire year. (I swear he can't stand to hear compliments about himself-just last week they were telling him how great of a year he has had).

    He received a lunch time detention (per his iep-he can't be suspended because it is related to his disability-difficult child doesn't know this). He was smiling and proud to be there-not a good thing! They also then decided to give him an hour of ISS along with community service to earn back points he lost today.

    Wish I knew what triggered all of this. I wonder if it has anything to do with his sister being so mean to him yesterday (see other post). I truly hope it was a one day thing and not the start of things to come. I feel so bad for the teachers and other kids today that had to deal with all of this today.

    If you made it this far-thanks-I know this turned out longer than I wanted.

    Do I call the psychiatrist based on this one day's outbursts?
  2. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    It's not really a one day outburst. You posted the other day that he was shoving you and you said that he hadn't been violent in a while. Does the psychiatrist have an opinion on the weird look in his eyes?

    I'm sorry for the bad day.

  3. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator


    I would definitely call the psychiatrist about today. His behavior is a 180 degree turn around from the rest of the school year. I'm sorry for all involved today.
  4. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I would write it up like you did here and give to psychiatrist (fax or drop off at his office) for his records. Let psychiatrist decide if this is an ASAP issue or if it is just something to watch.

    Since it is so out of norm for him, I think psychiatrist should know about it and the sooner you document, the more info you will remember to put into that documentation.
  5. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    I would definately call the doctor tomorrow. The increase in violence combined with the look in his eyes.....something is up. My difficult child will just get a look to him when his medications are off (or as of late, when he's off his medications) Sometimes I can see it before others can (that Mom thing) but in your case, with others seeing it too....something is definately up.
  6. DramaQueenLucy

    DramaQueenLucy New Member

    I think I would call the psychiatrist. Sorry it has been a rough day :(
  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Yes, I would call with an update. I'm sorry he's falling apart the last two days. I hope things turn around. Any chance he missed/didn't take some of his medications? What about a recent growth spurt?

    Very frustrating, I'm sure.
  8. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Don't even think about not calling the psychiatrist!
  9. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Definitely call the psychiatrist!! My son gets that look in his eyes when his Depakote levels are off.
  10. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I would call.

    I also would do a clean sweep in his room to make sure there are no old medications or something else he found that could have caused this. Heck, it could be a Jolt cola or something like that.

    Or it could be the end of year anxiety kicking in.

    Or sister's behavior towards him.

    Or - well you get the idea. You may never know what caused this. Let's hope you never have to figure it out because it was a one day thing.
  11. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks everyone! I did call his psychiatrist's office today and spoke to his nurse. They are concerned and we are raising his Loxapine 10 more mgs per night. Hopefully this will do the trick.

    He did have a better day today but still a fairly rough morning. I'm hoping tomorrow is even better. He did have a good night.

    Also his principal called last night. We really like and respect her but didn't agree with her. She would like us to take out of the IEP part that says difficult child can only be suspended for level four behaviors. She said it is hard for them to staff an ISS. We told her we understood but that if they found this behavior continuing maybe we should be advocating for more staff.

    We worked hard to get this in the IEP. It truly is related to his disability and out of school suspensions have no impact on difficult child. I feel bad about this because I truly understand where she is coming from especially as a teacher-I know how hard the staffing part is because of the budget. As a parent of a child with a disability though I'm not willing to let this go.
  12. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Hold firm for what your child needs. I can see where it would be hard for you to do that as you can so understand the school's predictament.

    It would be hard to be a teacher and have a child with special needs. That would be extra tough.
  13. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    The problem with unstable behavior is that even the sound of hair growing will trigger them.(just making a joke). It's their state of excitation or irritability that is the problem not the trigger.

    I never knew the answer and still don't.
  14. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    is your son in a special school? I am guessing yes because my son's school would've had me there after the 1st shoving incident. I am so sorry, I know how it feels when you see the school's and your heaart rate escalates! something about this time of year I swear!

  15. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Crazymama-We are going to try and hold firm. I'm hoping they don't have the right to force us to take it out of the iep.

    Fran-I think you're right it definitely has to do with instability. Like you said it could be the sound of hair growing-lol.

    Amaze-He is not in a special school. We have worked hard on his iep and have it in his iep that he cannot be suspended unless it is a level 4 behavior. That is because we have it documented that many of his behaviors are due to his ability. We aren't excusing his behavior and the can give him ISS. Also we are really lucky this year with the team that works with him really seem to understand and get him.
  16. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Glad you called the doctors.
    The end of the school year was always a trigger for Matt. Things went down hill rapidly the last 2 weeks of school.
    Hold firm on the IEP thing. I had the same thing in Matt's IEP. In Texas it is a law that a child cannot be suspended from school due to a behavior that is from a disability - I would imagine your state has the same thing - therefore they cannot change his IEP even if they wanted to.