I will try to make this as short as possible... which is almost impossible but I will try! Difficult Child (son) is currently in County jail but hopefully will be home sometime mid 2016. The charges he was arrested for were assault and simple assault on his girlfriend. (LOOONG back story, she has also been arrested multiple times) Anyway, my son ended up in jail and has been there for approx 4 months. During this time the girlfriend has spoken to him a few times and told him she loves him, wants to be with him etc etc.. We have a horrible relationship with the girlfriend if you can even call it that. She has not been allowed in our home for a couple of years leading up to my son's arrest due to the fighting that goes on between the two of them. She has said horrible things to us in the past, accusing us of all kinds of things.. anyway, we have pretty much decided to have no relationship with her whatsoever. My son is now asking me to please try to forgive (he's been reading about forgiveness...) and to accept her back into our lives. FIRST of all, they are not supposed to have ANY contact with each other when he comes home as part of his probation. SECOND, we (his dad and I) have been told to have no contact with her either. Not only that but from past experience I am afraid that nothing has changed and they will go back to their old ways and he will end up in prison. My son wants me to text or call her to let her know that we can move forward and that I do not hate her.. I told my son I cannot do anything until my trust is restored in him.. I under no circumstances want them back together once he is home.. Nothing I say can make him understand how we feel, right now I think he is being very selfish and is asking me to do something that I do not feel comfortable with but it will improve his relationship with the girlfriend... so I feel it is out of selfish reasons that he wants me to contact her. Anyway, any advice on how to deal with this situation? He is of course also resorting to the emotional blackmail ... IE: "I am not going to call anymore"" (fine with me) "Nobody cares" (of course we do but he can't or won't see that because we are not following his instructions) and so on and so on.. I know I sounds very bitter, and I am after what he has put this family through... Thanks in advance for any advice ..