Bipolar: Push the manic button (not the panic button) for instant mood stabilization! Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Push the panic button for reassurance that it really is all in your head. ADHD: Push the -- oh look! A squirrel! Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD): Push the button. Push the button. Push the button. Push the button. Push the button. Push... Schizophrenia: Push the button and hear voices on your phone instead of your head! Just think of the possibilities... No more drugs. We just tell those wack-o's, "Hey, there's an app for that!" We'd call it the Mental iPhone (i for illness). Available in Institutional Green, Sterile Stainless Steel and Pharmeceutical Psychedellic. Order yours now and get a FREE credit report! Limited to the first 250,000 customers. Qualified customers must have credit history for free report. Offer not valid in Guam, North Dakota and Puerto Rico. Taxes, license, documention and legal fees not included and added at substantially higher cost. Offer expires. Wow. It's been a looong day. I think this is a sign that it's time for bed!