Hi, all! I wanted to get some opinions on a couple of ddifferent things. 1) If there was reason to believe that you, as a parent, caused your difficult child to be a difficult child or that you were doing something major to contribute to the difficult child's problems, do you think out of 3 child& adolescent psychiatrists, neuropsychologist test results/report, numerous tdocs and psychiatric hospital stays with- sw's, that these profs would tell you, as the parent, more than the difficult child's diagnosis, recommended treatment plan and that individual therapy for the difficult child and family therapy might help? Obviously, if they thought you were abusing the child or really causing danger for the child, they would have to report that to dss or police. If that has never been done and they've just included family therapy in recommendations at times, or support for the parent, would it be feasible that if they thought the parent had a psychiatric problem or personality disorder that they would tell the difficult child's gal, but not anyone else and never mention that at all to the parent? If they (the mental health profs for the difficult child) thought the parent needed psychiatric treatment and without it they might be causing more difficulty for the difficult child, would it be safe to assume that they would mention it to the parent, even if they mentioned it to the gal, too? 2) If in your own immediate and extended family the custom was that adults don't kiss other adult family members on the lips unless they are married and the only ones who kiss kids on the lips are immediate family members of very young children, then that even stops as the child approaches adolescence, would it bother you a lot to see an extended family member kiss a 11yo on the lips, especially if the 11yo is of the gender that is the sexual preference of the adult and when that adult was a teen, they tried to force molestation on a younger kid? If it would bother you, how much off a red flag would it throw up to you?