2 updates, psychiatrist medication. update and my difficult child left today

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by AK0603, Feb 22, 2007.

  1. AK0603

    AK0603 New Member

    Went to the last appointment here in NY today with difficult child, obviously with seeing no improvment and the bed wetting (which she said is quite normal for this) it's not the right medication for him, but since he was moving the next day she didn't want to change anything without being able to follow him, understandably. So she gave him a little more to get him through the 8th when he will see his new psychiatrist in Indiana.

    Then today around 1 pm he left, I was really really bad. I actually had a panic attack once he was gone and took my Xanax which of course has calmed me down alot. :frown: My heart aches, I almost feel like there's been a death. Is it normal to feel this sad? I keep thinking I've been on the ONLY one to ever get him ready for school, homework, dr. appts and now his father will be reponsible for all this, and it's hard.

    He'll be at his dad's house Sat. night. I pray I have made the right decision, our little 3 yr old was so sad and sweet, right when he was leaving she gave him her favorite teddy bear, cried and hugged him and said, Dalton you are my bestest friend, take my bear to hug at night and pretend it's me" God I really lost it. :frown:
     
  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sending cyber hugs your way. I can only imagine how difficult this must be. on the other hand, it sure sounds like the correct decision for
    your son. Hugs. DDD
     
  3. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    I would have too. Such maturity and sweetness at such a young age. Stay strong you are doing the right thing.
     
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Amy...I forget how old your son is but I can imagine how hard this is on you. With time it will get better. My son was first placed out of the home in wilderness camp when he had just turned 11. He was there for 16 months.

    It is very hard to be away from a child but you can write to him and call him from time to time. Send him little cards to let him know you are thinking about him. I would keep them upbeat and happy so he doesnt think you are sad. You dont want him to be upset.

    Your mommy heart will heal. Your doing the best thing for him. Sometimes it hurts to be a mom.
     
  5. Loris

    Loris New Member

    I'm sorry this is so hard, but I do understand. Sometimes even doing what we know is best for them hurts so much. Your little girl must have made all of you feel so good. I think I would have lost it, too.
     
  6. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    I know that had to be one of the hardest decisions to make, but in your heart you know that it had to be made. Hopefully, he will get stable enough to be able to return home soon. You are in my thoughts and prayers tonight and for the next few days.
     
  7. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    He's 10 right??? How hard on you... but maybe this will help your relationship with husband and depending on how difficult child does, how husband reacts in the future??? It is nice that your ex is willing to take him. Are you going to move, has that been discussed anymore???
    GO easy on yourself it can't be easy, even if it is the right thing. Hopefully he will do better... and you will soon see the son you know is in there.

    hugs
     
  8. jodyice

    jodyice New Member

    My thoughts are with you, I can imagine how difficult this had to be. ~hugs~
     
  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Ohhhhhhhhh, Amy, the teddy bear really got me.
    Yes, I think your feelings are normal. It's a hard process for everyone.
    You have phones and internet, no? Just to soften the blow.
     
  10. AK0603

    AK0603 New Member

    Thanks everyone, thoughts and prayers are always appreciated. husband is home now and I took my other pill my doctor gave me when I feel like I'm "hysterical" in these situations, more like a Vallum or something, he's going to stay home tomorrow so I can sleep in. He's been giving me lots of hugs today and feels bad and keeps saying that. So I know he does care.

    difficult child just called and said they are 1/2 way home, staying in a hotel and my parent's said he's doing okay, not crying, they are taking him to dinner and hanging out. he loves is grandparents so that will help the transition as well.

    Thanks again, I'll update you too.

    Good luck to all you other mommies with difficult child's.
     
  11. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: amyk0603</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I pray I have made the right decision, our little 3 yr old was so sad and sweet, right when he was leaving she gave him her favorite teddy bear, cried and hugged him and said, Dalton you are my bestest friend, take my bear to hug at night and pretend it's me" God I really lost it. :frown: </div></div>

    I lost it too just reading your post. :crying: {{{Hugs}}} Try to think of this as your son getting a chance to strengthen his relationship with his father. He was given two parents because he needs both of you. He has had you for the day to day stuff up until today and now it is his father's turn. You need to try to take this time to recover from the stress of having a difficult child, work on parenting your easy child (they often feel lost in the shuffle of gfgdom) and strengthen your marriage.
     
  12. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh Amy,
    I can only imagine how hard this is for you-sending hugs and prayers your way. :angel:
     
  13. Janna

    Janna New Member

    Really good advice. So sad :frown: I'm so sorry, Amy. (((HUGS)))

    Janna
     
  14. AK0603

    AK0603 New Member

    Thanks everyone. I think I'm all cried out tonight. I'm going to try and sleep.

    Sweet dreams to all, and God bless.
     
  15. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Amy, sorry I missed this thread yesterday, did not have a chance to pop in.

    I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you. You know, I have been there done that. It is very difficult to not be the one to do everything when you always have been the one. It is OK. Cry for now. You are being a good parent and trying one more thing to help your difficult child. Fingers crossed it has a positive effect on him for his lifetime. It worked for me, so I am hopeful it will work for you and your difficult child.
     
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