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Substance Abuse
25 yr old son living at home, lies, steals, sneaks and cant keep a job
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<blockquote data-quote="tbod" data-source="post: 685997" data-attributes="member: 20297"><p>Exactly, can write a book on this...but in a nut shell, saw this coming long long ago.</p><p>The key indicators early on for my kid (19 now) was the lack in the ability to read others and adjust his own behaviors to "fit in" and start developing his own persona early on. Then,came the endless rejection from his peers and schools due to his inability to socially integrate coupled with lack of self control and ADHD. That coupled with impulsive behaviors, lack of good decision making skills, and an insatiable emotional neediness, made him a perfect target for pot, and derelicts that became his friends. So, what you get is a kid that has no real ability to focus, therefore no real development of self discipline or motivation...coupled with pot as the mode of self soothing because of the anxieties of being basically a social misfit. Unfortunately, the outlook for these types is kind of bleak in my opinion. So, the bottom line is he is completing evening high school this June, and is going to move out of my house (no choice) and will have to make it on his own. He is playing everyone to include his family psychologist and every therapist he has had. Hospitalized 11 times throughout childhood. What a racket that is. This is learned behavior by the way. He has no complex planning ability...just a short term conniving personality as that was what he learned over the years the doctors like to hear...since not having the wherewithal to have any real ability (as that would mean exerting himself), so he's developed this fast talk (without really saying anything and you can actually hear him contradict himself and lose the point he's trying to make) that he truly believes is how he will get out of trouble and jams throughout life...and make "deals". He just got fired today (his third job he's been fired from in less than two years) for fighting a co-worker. What an idiot. And is already down playing it stating he doesn't really care. He has stolen from us, lied to us endlessly, and is a complete loser who really needs to move out and get on with his life as best he can. Not going to wait for him to stabilize himself or whatever....that is a farce. Anyway, thanks for listening.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tbod, post: 685997, member: 20297"] Exactly, can write a book on this...but in a nut shell, saw this coming long long ago. The key indicators early on for my kid (19 now) was the lack in the ability to read others and adjust his own behaviors to "fit in" and start developing his own persona early on. Then,came the endless rejection from his peers and schools due to his inability to socially integrate coupled with lack of self control and ADHD. That coupled with impulsive behaviors, lack of good decision making skills, and an insatiable emotional neediness, made him a perfect target for pot, and derelicts that became his friends. So, what you get is a kid that has no real ability to focus, therefore no real development of self discipline or motivation...coupled with pot as the mode of self soothing because of the anxieties of being basically a social misfit. Unfortunately, the outlook for these types is kind of bleak in my opinion. So, the bottom line is he is completing evening high school this June, and is going to move out of my house (no choice) and will have to make it on his own. He is playing everyone to include his family psychologist and every therapist he has had. Hospitalized 11 times throughout childhood. What a racket that is. This is learned behavior by the way. He has no complex planning ability...just a short term conniving personality as that was what he learned over the years the doctors like to hear...since not having the wherewithal to have any real ability (as that would mean exerting himself), so he's developed this fast talk (without really saying anything and you can actually hear him contradict himself and lose the point he's trying to make) that he truly believes is how he will get out of trouble and jams throughout life...and make "deals". He just got fired today (his third job he's been fired from in less than two years) for fighting a co-worker. What an idiot. And is already down playing it stating he doesn't really care. He has stolen from us, lied to us endlessly, and is a complete loser who really needs to move out and get on with his life as best he can. Not going to wait for him to stabilize himself or whatever....that is a farce. Anyway, thanks for listening. [/QUOTE]
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25 yr old son living at home, lies, steals, sneaks and cant keep a job
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