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<blockquote data-quote="Dixies_fire" data-source="post: 625367" data-attributes="member: 16184"><p>Honey just because someone always has it worse is no reason for you not to be allowed to feel stressed..</p><p></p><p>As for your neighbors and family, people always have their own opinions and you can not make everyone happy. </p><p></p><p>Point blank period unless they are in the SAME situation you are in and doing something different that's working better they have no room to talk.</p><p></p><p>I have dealt for two years and really solidly since my husbands schitzo phrenic diagnoses that I was the reason he had problems that unless I devoted all time and attention to him and our child (mr Lewis) and pretty much ignored my 9 and 4 year olds (my ex's children) needs and wants then I wasn't a good enough mother or wife. I never believed it in my heart the things he would say to me. </p><p></p><p>You need to tell yourself and believe it that you are doing things the best way YOU can do them and if anyone else wanted to come give you a hand they can have a say but until then you go on doing what you can.</p><p></p><p>And your grandpa if he doesn't want to be in a home will accept a home help professional, you lay out the options and tell him point blank these are the last options he has. And if he doesn't agree to one of them you can't help anymore as his health deteriorates. </p><p></p><p>I have been in a similar situation with my mom. My difficult child sister was supposed to be taking care of her and wasn't and not only wasn't but was messing up her finances almost irreparably. She was</p><p>Put in a position where if difficult child sister stayed she would lose her house in a matter of a month or two. She felt responsible for difficult child sister. But sister did not feel responsible for her or her finances or the condition of the house. I told her if she kept sister with her she would lose the house and be forced to live with others or in a home and if she didn't want that she would have to cooperate with me and my brother and get Andria out of the house. Between that and her heart attack she relented and accepted the decision that sister had to deal with sister, she was no longer mom's problem. </p><p></p><p>I'm sending wafts of confidence and peace with the decisions you have made and strength to show your grandpa his options in a way he can accept.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dixies_fire, post: 625367, member: 16184"] Honey just because someone always has it worse is no reason for you not to be allowed to feel stressed.. As for your neighbors and family, people always have their own opinions and you can not make everyone happy. Point blank period unless they are in the SAME situation you are in and doing something different that's working better they have no room to talk. I have dealt for two years and really solidly since my husbands schitzo phrenic diagnoses that I was the reason he had problems that unless I devoted all time and attention to him and our child (mr Lewis) and pretty much ignored my 9 and 4 year olds (my ex's children) needs and wants then I wasn't a good enough mother or wife. I never believed it in my heart the things he would say to me. You need to tell yourself and believe it that you are doing things the best way YOU can do them and if anyone else wanted to come give you a hand they can have a say but until then you go on doing what you can. And your grandpa if he doesn't want to be in a home will accept a home help professional, you lay out the options and tell him point blank these are the last options he has. And if he doesn't agree to one of them you can't help anymore as his health deteriorates. I have been in a similar situation with my mom. My difficult child sister was supposed to be taking care of her and wasn't and not only wasn't but was messing up her finances almost irreparably. She was Put in a position where if difficult child sister stayed she would lose her house in a matter of a month or two. She felt responsible for difficult child sister. But sister did not feel responsible for her or her finances or the condition of the house. I told her if she kept sister with her she would lose the house and be forced to live with others or in a home and if she didn't want that she would have to cooperate with me and my brother and get Andria out of the house. Between that and her heart attack she relented and accepted the decision that sister had to deal with sister, she was no longer mom's problem. I'm sending wafts of confidence and peace with the decisions you have made and strength to show your grandpa his options in a way he can accept. Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app [/QUOTE]
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