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Adoption attorney appointment today - difficult child in all her glory
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<blockquote data-quote="Rhonda" data-source="post: 253540" data-attributes="member: 6732"><p>Honey, you need a break! Good grief! You must have about 10 halo's hovering!!</p><p> </p><p>You do realize that from what you have posted it sounds like you are handling this like you would if it were you doing it. It does not sound like how this difficult child would handle it at all unless she had a nice saint to force her to.</p><p> </p><p>What would happen if you backed out? What if you said it is yours, I am done. You have a nice home. A roof over your head and food on your plate. That is it. Love you mean it.</p><p> </p><p>Would she come and actually ask you to pay for the doctor visit or take her to it? Would she even remember to go? Would she find a way to meet with the attorney on her on? Would she grow up a little and take some responsiblity for her actions? </p><p> </p><p>I dont believe in expecting responsibility from people (but that is me). I think responsibility is doing the best you can with where you are in life. It doesnt sound like she has had that opportunity. Maybe you would be less frustrated if you gave her that opportunity and had no expectations of her. She would then have to live with those choices not you (unless you make yourself). </p><p> </p><p>You are right you are more the father than whichever one actually is. Why? Because they are not? Why? Seems like something you have put on yourself. I certainly dont know the whole situation so disregard my opinion if I did not understand. But if the shoe fits..</p><p> </p><p>I can't imagine being in your situation. You truly have held yourself accountable for way more than the mother has. I think I would stop paying for everything and go to Mexico and have a massage and a margarita. I might even use the extra money to hire a nanny to handle difficult child's appointments while I was gone... (to make sure I could enjoy the massage)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rhonda, post: 253540, member: 6732"] Honey, you need a break! Good grief! You must have about 10 halo's hovering!! You do realize that from what you have posted it sounds like you are handling this like you would if it were you doing it. It does not sound like how this difficult child would handle it at all unless she had a nice saint to force her to. What would happen if you backed out? What if you said it is yours, I am done. You have a nice home. A roof over your head and food on your plate. That is it. Love you mean it. Would she come and actually ask you to pay for the doctor visit or take her to it? Would she even remember to go? Would she find a way to meet with the attorney on her on? Would she grow up a little and take some responsiblity for her actions? I dont believe in expecting responsibility from people (but that is me). I think responsibility is doing the best you can with where you are in life. It doesnt sound like she has had that opportunity. Maybe you would be less frustrated if you gave her that opportunity and had no expectations of her. She would then have to live with those choices not you (unless you make yourself). You are right you are more the father than whichever one actually is. Why? Because they are not? Why? Seems like something you have put on yourself. I certainly dont know the whole situation so disregard my opinion if I did not understand. But if the shoe fits.. I can't imagine being in your situation. You truly have held yourself accountable for way more than the mother has. I think I would stop paying for everything and go to Mexico and have a massage and a margarita. I might even use the extra money to hire a nanny to handle difficult child's appointments while I was gone... (to make sure I could enjoy the massage) [/QUOTE]
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Adoption attorney appointment today - difficult child in all her glory
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