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adoption gone wrong
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 487668" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>So hard, it is one of the big risks in adoption. My girlfriend was a foster mom and willing to adopt a couple of kids. She did adopt one, that's how we met, he has multiple needs too. but before him, she and her hubby had a baby placed (they are native american and her mom is a tribal lawyer so the baby was thru the tribe) and they named him and were raising him. she had young kids and was even able to nurse the baby. Funny enough he had a name starting with Q too. All of a sudden a few months later, the birth mom showed up and decided to take him back to the rez. That was that, she just took him. My friend was devastated. Her whole family was. Years later when they did their adoped son's ceremony on the rez where her family lived, they met the birth mom and their former son. Of course he didn't feel like their son, he was frozen in time as a baby to them. They were very poor, mom never got clean, the boy was a mess in terms of using, school progress, behavior etc. He had no idea they were his former adoptive parents. She was so sad for him but they pushed on and celebrated their son's adoption. </p><p></p><p>It is just so painful. I had one adoption not work out, my choice, but it was really sad. (They never met me and had no idea) I am sorry for your family member. I wish it was different and I dont understand the laws in these cases, if he is not fit, and unwilling, then he should not be able to have legal say. Then there are other states where if a perfectly able dad wants to raise their child, they have no say and can't get their babies... the girl can just send them away. It is not rocket science. Do what they do for adoptive parents, a homestudy. so crazy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 487668, member: 12886"] So hard, it is one of the big risks in adoption. My girlfriend was a foster mom and willing to adopt a couple of kids. She did adopt one, that's how we met, he has multiple needs too. but before him, she and her hubby had a baby placed (they are native american and her mom is a tribal lawyer so the baby was thru the tribe) and they named him and were raising him. she had young kids and was even able to nurse the baby. Funny enough he had a name starting with Q too. All of a sudden a few months later, the birth mom showed up and decided to take him back to the rez. That was that, she just took him. My friend was devastated. Her whole family was. Years later when they did their adoped son's ceremony on the rez where her family lived, they met the birth mom and their former son. Of course he didn't feel like their son, he was frozen in time as a baby to them. They were very poor, mom never got clean, the boy was a mess in terms of using, school progress, behavior etc. He had no idea they were his former adoptive parents. She was so sad for him but they pushed on and celebrated their son's adoption. It is just so painful. I had one adoption not work out, my choice, but it was really sad. (They never met me and had no idea) I am sorry for your family member. I wish it was different and I dont understand the laws in these cases, if he is not fit, and unwilling, then he should not be able to have legal say. Then there are other states where if a perfectly able dad wants to raise their child, they have no say and can't get their babies... the girl can just send them away. It is not rocket science. Do what they do for adoptive parents, a homestudy. so crazy. [/QUOTE]
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adoption gone wrong
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