My son, 4 1/2, was just diagnosed with "severe ODD/ADHD" last month. The pediatric neurologist who made the diagnosis, referred me to another doctor. I called that doctor, who said he's not taking any more patients, and referred me another. This one said he's only dealing with high-functioning spectrum, and he referred me to another. I met #3 today... his "method" for helping ODD/ADHD kids is to sit in a big group, along with parents, and "discuss" behavior over the past week. If it was good... they get a prize. If not... better luck next week. Maybe that works for some people, but I hated it. Besides, my son is 4, not 14... he doesn't possess the skills to reflect objectively on his own behavior during the course of a week. I'm back to square 1.
I don't even know what I'm looking for. My pediatrician gave me more names and numbers to try, and I don't even know what to ask these people. I am reading "The Explosive Child" and it's given me some hope... I take comfort in the idea that maybe I will find a way to teach flexibility and frustration tolerance... but I still feel like it misses the mark with a child this young and immature. I want to find something that says, "here... do THIS, and you and your preschooler will feel better."
A lot of what I see online suggests that my poor parenting has done this to my son. I'm sure it has. I have lost my temper on several occasions over the years, and he's seen it. In fact, he actually seems to ENJOY driving me to the edge, and I feel like I'm in knots whenever I realize I need to ask him to do something (ie, get dressed, get in the car, turn off the TV, etc) because I never know whether he'll comply, or whether it will be a battle... and he's only 4. I don't know if I can do this with a teenager.
And the thoughts that go through my head of what I want to do to him when we're in the heat of a power-struggle... my god... I am probably the worst parent in the world to think such awful thoughts about my own child!
Please help... what am I looking for? A psychiatrist? A psychologist? a social worker? a counselor? individual therapy? play therapy? classes?? Does anyone have any more books to suggest? Special diets?
Yoga poses?
Cocktails?
Thanks for being here. I stumbled on this site and finally feel like mayb i'm not the only one in the world with a kid whose behavior makes other people raise their eyebrows at me. I don't need to be a mind-reader to know their thoughts.
~ch~
I don't even know what I'm looking for. My pediatrician gave me more names and numbers to try, and I don't even know what to ask these people. I am reading "The Explosive Child" and it's given me some hope... I take comfort in the idea that maybe I will find a way to teach flexibility and frustration tolerance... but I still feel like it misses the mark with a child this young and immature. I want to find something that says, "here... do THIS, and you and your preschooler will feel better."
A lot of what I see online suggests that my poor parenting has done this to my son. I'm sure it has. I have lost my temper on several occasions over the years, and he's seen it. In fact, he actually seems to ENJOY driving me to the edge, and I feel like I'm in knots whenever I realize I need to ask him to do something (ie, get dressed, get in the car, turn off the TV, etc) because I never know whether he'll comply, or whether it will be a battle... and he's only 4. I don't know if I can do this with a teenager.
And the thoughts that go through my head of what I want to do to him when we're in the heat of a power-struggle... my god... I am probably the worst parent in the world to think such awful thoughts about my own child!
Please help... what am I looking for? A psychiatrist? A psychologist? a social worker? a counselor? individual therapy? play therapy? classes?? Does anyone have any more books to suggest? Special diets?
Yoga poses?
Cocktails?
Thanks for being here. I stumbled on this site and finally feel like mayb i'm not the only one in the world with a kid whose behavior makes other people raise their eyebrows at me. I don't need to be a mind-reader to know their thoughts.
~ch~