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am I doing the right thing.....
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 436856" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>OK, I'll take the bait and play devil's advocate here... </p><p>For the record: NOT that I support the way he treated you, because I don't.</p><p></p><p>BUT... when I see stuff like this...</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>... I start seeing red! This is not necessarily the the case. It is possible to be highly athletic, and still have major problems with...</p><p>- finer motor skills, like dressing</p><p>- organization, planning, initiation, inhibition, and other executive functions</p><p></p><p>Sports do absolutely NOTHING to address any of these issues, either. NOT EVER.</p><p></p><p>Sports DO have a postiive impact. Its a good thing this kid IS good at sports and has a framework in which he can succeed. If he did not have that, you would likely be having MORE issues and more SERIOUS ones.</p><p></p><p>The one thing that is not fair to ANYONE in this picture, is that this child does not have a <strong><u>full and complete diagnosis of all issues</u></strong>. It isn't enough to get one label - that may be the most obvious single thing going on but can still be less than 10% of the whole picture. These kids are VERY complex. To avoid secondary problems (the issues you had today are secondary problems), these kids need to be caught BEFORE AGE 8. How many are? Well, I haven't seen stats... but given that many kids don't start the diagnosis route until they hit school (exp. if the issues are not from a pervasive developmental disorder like Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)), AND that it takes an average lf 7 years to get a complete diagnosis (quoting from someone else on this forum...) - well, you do the math as to how many get caught in time.</p><p></p><p>Secondary issues start showing up no later than grade 3 - might not be caught until later, can start as early as K or grade 1. Anxiety, depression, anger, lashing out - verbally and/or physically, stealing, lying, cheating, work refusal, etc. - there are some cases where some of these things can be a primary issue, but far more often, they are secondary - brought on by other needs not being addressed appropriately.</p><p></p><p>So - as MWM said...</p><p></p><p></p><p>Take this as a big red flag. Its a warning. Get help - for all of you - as fast as your legs can get you there.</p><p></p><p>-----</p><p>Having said all that - you're still a Mom. You're still normal. Every day takes its toll. Look after yourself - for your sake, and for his sake, and for the rest of the family. We've all been there done that!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 436856, member: 11791"] OK, I'll take the bait and play devil's advocate here... For the record: NOT that I support the way he treated you, because I don't. BUT... when I see stuff like this... ... I start seeing red! This is not necessarily the the case. It is possible to be highly athletic, and still have major problems with... - finer motor skills, like dressing - organization, planning, initiation, inhibition, and other executive functions Sports do absolutely NOTHING to address any of these issues, either. NOT EVER. Sports DO have a postiive impact. Its a good thing this kid IS good at sports and has a framework in which he can succeed. If he did not have that, you would likely be having MORE issues and more SERIOUS ones. The one thing that is not fair to ANYONE in this picture, is that this child does not have a [B][U]full and complete diagnosis of all issues[/U][/B]. It isn't enough to get one label - that may be the most obvious single thing going on but can still be less than 10% of the whole picture. These kids are VERY complex. To avoid secondary problems (the issues you had today are secondary problems), these kids need to be caught BEFORE AGE 8. How many are? Well, I haven't seen stats... but given that many kids don't start the diagnosis route until they hit school (exp. if the issues are not from a pervasive developmental disorder like Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)), AND that it takes an average lf 7 years to get a complete diagnosis (quoting from someone else on this forum...) - well, you do the math as to how many get caught in time. Secondary issues start showing up no later than grade 3 - might not be caught until later, can start as early as K or grade 1. Anxiety, depression, anger, lashing out - verbally and/or physically, stealing, lying, cheating, work refusal, etc. - there are some cases where some of these things can be a primary issue, but far more often, they are secondary - brought on by other needs not being addressed appropriately. So - as MWM said... Take this as a big red flag. Its a warning. Get help - for all of you - as fast as your legs can get you there. ----- Having said all that - you're still a Mom. You're still normal. Every day takes its toll. Look after yourself - for your sake, and for his sake, and for the rest of the family. We've all been there done that! [/QUOTE]
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