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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 468207" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>She should be able t use the Wee connection in her favour. "If I can cope with this kid, I can handle any other problem you throw at me."</p><p></p><p>We also live in a small village where everyone knows everyone else. One of the teachers we had most trouble with, was someone who was an old friend of mine from before either of us had kids. I knew her through church, through community musical/dramatic events. Then she was assigned to teach difficult child 3, and we had problems. Seriously adding to those problems, was her having her own son in her own class, and he was also one of the kids bullying difficult child 3. My boy had so many detentions that year, as well as some very idiotic statements from a friend and teacher who should have known us better. This was the year that a note came home from the teacher telling me we needed to teach difficult child 3 to NOT call other kids "f@%%@t retard" because he would never make friends if he called other kids such names. I wrote back pointing out that she knew our family well, knew that difficult child 3 did not learn such phrases in our home but that if she examined the bad words, she would realise that difficult child 3 had in fact heard them at school, applied to himself first. She needed to find out who difficult child 3 said those words to, then question that boy as to why he had called difficult child 3 that nasty term. The "retard" label was often used by the bullies towards difficult child 3. It was not a term that the kids applied to each other at all, only to difficult child 3.</p><p></p><p>Small towns can be a hassle, but we have carved out niche here and now that our kids are older, we once more are respected. Including difficult child 3. But only by those people whose opinions we value. And the others don't matter.</p><p></p><p>When the other families who currently sneer and gossip about your child have their own precious darlings reach their teens and begin drugging, whoring and stealing, and Wee does not - that is when you will find a new respect for you and your family, even in a very small village.</p><p></p><p>Chin up, Shari. It is okay. Opinions and gossip don't matter, but you can use them as a tool - keep your ear to the ground and stay in touch with what people are saying, it can help you head off trouble at the pass. But don't confide in anyone, anything you don't want to hear coming back. I had to pull my head in a long way and stop telling anyone anything for years. </p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 468207, member: 1991"] She should be able t use the Wee connection in her favour. "If I can cope with this kid, I can handle any other problem you throw at me." We also live in a small village where everyone knows everyone else. One of the teachers we had most trouble with, was someone who was an old friend of mine from before either of us had kids. I knew her through church, through community musical/dramatic events. Then she was assigned to teach difficult child 3, and we had problems. Seriously adding to those problems, was her having her own son in her own class, and he was also one of the kids bullying difficult child 3. My boy had so many detentions that year, as well as some very idiotic statements from a friend and teacher who should have known us better. This was the year that a note came home from the teacher telling me we needed to teach difficult child 3 to NOT call other kids "f@%%@t retard" because he would never make friends if he called other kids such names. I wrote back pointing out that she knew our family well, knew that difficult child 3 did not learn such phrases in our home but that if she examined the bad words, she would realise that difficult child 3 had in fact heard them at school, applied to himself first. She needed to find out who difficult child 3 said those words to, then question that boy as to why he had called difficult child 3 that nasty term. The "retard" label was often used by the bullies towards difficult child 3. It was not a term that the kids applied to each other at all, only to difficult child 3. Small towns can be a hassle, but we have carved out niche here and now that our kids are older, we once more are respected. Including difficult child 3. But only by those people whose opinions we value. And the others don't matter. When the other families who currently sneer and gossip about your child have their own precious darlings reach their teens and begin drugging, whoring and stealing, and Wee does not - that is when you will find a new respect for you and your family, even in a very small village. Chin up, Shari. It is okay. Opinions and gossip don't matter, but you can use them as a tool - keep your ear to the ground and stay in touch with what people are saying, it can help you head off trouble at the pass. But don't confide in anyone, anything you don't want to hear coming back. I had to pull my head in a long way and stop telling anyone anything for years. Marg [/QUOTE]
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