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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 674842" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Mtdenise, I can understand your unsettled feelings about him coming back there and not knowing what will happen. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>It's great that you know <strong><u>this</u></strong>. Our homes must be our sanctuaries. Especially when we are dealing with the pain of a Difficult Child.</p><p></p><p>Your son may likely spend time in jail for this. I know when my son violated probation several times he always went back to jail for a period of time. That was okay with me. My son had a lifelong habit of believing the rules don't apply to him. I contributed to that. So it was good for the buck to stop with law enforcement.</p><p></p><p>If you can, listen and be supportive about anything positive he says, but stand way back and give him a lot of space and boundaries and distance and time. </p><p></p><p>People often say one thing and do another. I saw with my son, as he began turning his life around about 18 months ago, a lot of doing really hard things (like sleeping outside on a bench and walking to work to be there at 4 a.m. day after day) for months. I didn't step in except to offer to wash his blanket a few times, have him over for dinner, and offer encouragement. We waited for months before we were confident enough in the fact that he was working very very hard to change, before we helped him get an apartment in late October. Four months went by for us.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there. I hope something good comes of all of this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 674842, member: 17542"] Mtdenise, I can understand your unsettled feelings about him coming back there and not knowing what will happen. It's great that you know [B][U]this[/U][/B]. Our homes must be our sanctuaries. Especially when we are dealing with the pain of a Difficult Child. Your son may likely spend time in jail for this. I know when my son violated probation several times he always went back to jail for a period of time. That was okay with me. My son had a lifelong habit of believing the rules don't apply to him. I contributed to that. So it was good for the buck to stop with law enforcement. If you can, listen and be supportive about anything positive he says, but stand way back and give him a lot of space and boundaries and distance and time. People often say one thing and do another. I saw with my son, as he began turning his life around about 18 months ago, a lot of doing really hard things (like sleeping outside on a bench and walking to work to be there at 4 a.m. day after day) for months. I didn't step in except to offer to wash his blanket a few times, have him over for dinner, and offer encouragement. We waited for months before we were confident enough in the fact that he was working very very hard to change, before we helped him get an apartment in late October. Four months went by for us. Hang in there. I hope something good comes of all of this. [/QUOTE]
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