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Another Newbie Here and question at the bottom of the LONG post
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<blockquote data-quote="wintak" data-source="post: 427776" data-attributes="member: 11938"><p>Thanks ladies...we got him home at 10 mos, he's from Guatemala. We know nothing about the birth mother other than her name and he was the 2nd child born to her. I don't know even how he was born (c-section or not). I know the possible fathers name, but again, no history. He had been in foster care for the 10 mos. The therapists are telling me that is the worst age I could have taken him home. Well, I didn't have a choice, the gov'Tourette's Syndrome of the US and Guat don't really like each other, at least at that time. He was SUPPOSED to have come home at 4 mos. I know pretty close to nothing about the foster family other than it was a man and a woman and 2 of their children. Many of the pix are of my son propped up with a bottle in his mouth.</p><p></p><p>I have no idea if the birth mother did drugs or alcohol, although we were told that in GENERAL they don't do drugs or drink alcohol in excess. He doesn't have features of a Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) baby.</p><p></p><p>As a youngster, he was VERY verbal, VERY early. People were amazed at how well he spoke and wanted him tested for GT. Finally relented, had him tested for GT where he scored lower on the test than if he had guessed on every question. Clearly he didn't want to take it, or didn't bother to listen to instructions etc. That brought up the Learning Disability (LD) issue so we had him tested AGAIN where he scored "typical" range...so no Learning Disability (LD). </p><p></p><p>He is not as well spoken now, at the end of 2nd grade. He insists on talking baby talk and no one has ever spoken to any of my kids in baby talk. He's difficult to understand at times, but if you ask him to repeat in a voice you can understand, he will. I don't see any obsessions and he's pretty open to change...that doesn't necessarily set him off unless he's not going to get his way when he wants something. He gets absolutely ****** off if he tells me something and I don't understand. And I try, to empathsize, mirror, reflect, approach non threateningly...all the tools they want me to use. I explain that (in this case) I don't go to his school so I don't understand what he's talking about and then he really gets peeved. I usually end the conversation there cuz he can get me really mad pretty quickly sometimes so I "disengage and walk away" (another tool therapy suggests).</p><p></p><p>Peer to peer relationships have been a problem, but I think he's doing better. Or at least that's what the school is telling me but then again just the other day a little girl said hi to him and he totally blew her off. So she said Hi again and he ignored her and she finally came right up to him and said..HI, how are you/? He just answered fine and turned away. It was a little girl in his class but it was like he didn't know how to act. I know he's got some friends who are peers, but they, too are socially awkward. He tends to think the older kids want to be his friends. When he was younger the girls would think he was cute. The girls would fawn on him and call him cute and he thought they were friends.</p><p></p><p>So you'd do group? Anybody try in home therapy? The only problem is difficult child will be an angel, easy child#1 will talk their ear off and easy child#2 will stick his thumb FIRMLY in his mouth and cling to me. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="wintak, post: 427776, member: 11938"] Thanks ladies...we got him home at 10 mos, he's from Guatemala. We know nothing about the birth mother other than her name and he was the 2nd child born to her. I don't know even how he was born (c-section or not). I know the possible fathers name, but again, no history. He had been in foster care for the 10 mos. The therapists are telling me that is the worst age I could have taken him home. Well, I didn't have a choice, the gov'Tourette's Syndrome of the US and Guat don't really like each other, at least at that time. He was SUPPOSED to have come home at 4 mos. I know pretty close to nothing about the foster family other than it was a man and a woman and 2 of their children. Many of the pix are of my son propped up with a bottle in his mouth. I have no idea if the birth mother did drugs or alcohol, although we were told that in GENERAL they don't do drugs or drink alcohol in excess. He doesn't have features of a Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) baby. As a youngster, he was VERY verbal, VERY early. People were amazed at how well he spoke and wanted him tested for GT. Finally relented, had him tested for GT where he scored lower on the test than if he had guessed on every question. Clearly he didn't want to take it, or didn't bother to listen to instructions etc. That brought up the Learning Disability (LD) issue so we had him tested AGAIN where he scored "typical" range...so no Learning Disability (LD). He is not as well spoken now, at the end of 2nd grade. He insists on talking baby talk and no one has ever spoken to any of my kids in baby talk. He's difficult to understand at times, but if you ask him to repeat in a voice you can understand, he will. I don't see any obsessions and he's pretty open to change...that doesn't necessarily set him off unless he's not going to get his way when he wants something. He gets absolutely ****** off if he tells me something and I don't understand. And I try, to empathsize, mirror, reflect, approach non threateningly...all the tools they want me to use. I explain that (in this case) I don't go to his school so I don't understand what he's talking about and then he really gets peeved. I usually end the conversation there cuz he can get me really mad pretty quickly sometimes so I "disengage and walk away" (another tool therapy suggests). Peer to peer relationships have been a problem, but I think he's doing better. Or at least that's what the school is telling me but then again just the other day a little girl said hi to him and he totally blew her off. So she said Hi again and he ignored her and she finally came right up to him and said..HI, how are you/? He just answered fine and turned away. It was a little girl in his class but it was like he didn't know how to act. I know he's got some friends who are peers, but they, too are socially awkward. He tends to think the older kids want to be his friends. When he was younger the girls would think he was cute. The girls would fawn on him and call him cute and he thought they were friends. So you'd do group? Anybody try in home therapy? The only problem is difficult child will be an angel, easy child#1 will talk their ear off and easy child#2 will stick his thumb FIRMLY in his mouth and cling to me. :-) [/QUOTE]
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