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General Parenting
Another Newbie Here and question at the bottom of the LONG post
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 427784" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>With his early history, and being propped to take a bottle rather than held, I'd be thinking of attachment problems. There is no good age to adopt a child other than straight from the hospital. But if you can't, it is best if the foster parents were loving, attentive, consistent and nurturing. If an infant or toddler does not get his needs met as an infant he soon learns that he has to depend only on himself and can have serious attachment issues that linger. I would not discount this as a reason why he is acting out. Has he ever seen somebody who is very knowledgeable about adopted children? Your child, like my four adopted kids, were not only adopted...they are culturally different from you and that can sometimes make the children feel like they don't really belong in the family. </p><p></p><p>I would want a neuropsychologist assessmet to see what is going on with your child. I do not trust school district testing at all. They are very basic. Are your other children also adopted or is he the only one? I think sometimes if only one is adopted, that child feels like he doesn't belong, no matter how much we love and nurture that child. I made sure after we adopted one asian child that we also adopted another. Likewise, after we adopted our African-American son, our next child was part African-American.</p><p></p><p>Adopted kids ARE different than our biological kids. There is always a bit of them feeling like they were rejected...all four of my adopted children have said this.</p><p></p><p>Plus not knowing the birth history becomes a problem too regarding genetics. Keep us posted on your progress. We care <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 427784, member: 1550"] With his early history, and being propped to take a bottle rather than held, I'd be thinking of attachment problems. There is no good age to adopt a child other than straight from the hospital. But if you can't, it is best if the foster parents were loving, attentive, consistent and nurturing. If an infant or toddler does not get his needs met as an infant he soon learns that he has to depend only on himself and can have serious attachment issues that linger. I would not discount this as a reason why he is acting out. Has he ever seen somebody who is very knowledgeable about adopted children? Your child, like my four adopted kids, were not only adopted...they are culturally different from you and that can sometimes make the children feel like they don't really belong in the family. I would want a neuropsychologist assessmet to see what is going on with your child. I do not trust school district testing at all. They are very basic. Are your other children also adopted or is he the only one? I think sometimes if only one is adopted, that child feels like he doesn't belong, no matter how much we love and nurture that child. I made sure after we adopted one asian child that we also adopted another. Likewise, after we adopted our African-American son, our next child was part African-American. Adopted kids ARE different than our biological kids. There is always a bit of them feeling like they were rejected...all four of my adopted children have said this. Plus not knowing the birth history becomes a problem too regarding genetics. Keep us posted on your progress. We care :) [/QUOTE]
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