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Substance Abuse
Another non update (of course rambling and long)...confession at the end
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 544124" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Sig, I am so sorry difficult child is doing this to you. And I KNOW how it feels first hand. </p><p></p><p>I also wouldn't let him come between you and H. It's not worth it. In the end, you and H are all you will have. The kids leave, have their own families, etc. </p><p></p><p>I also think it is very wise NOT to check his FB page because it's just going to upset you. There isn't anything you can do about it either. What he does, he does. Ditto for his cell phone calls (do you still pay for his cell phone?) That's something I would not do, considering his age and his actions.</p><p></p><p>On a more positive note, some of what he is doing is pretty typical. A lot of adult kids no longer like to participate in family get togethers, especially when they are still in those early adult years (I am laughing at the word "adult"), but legally they are. They get more into their friends and whatever else is going on and don't think that hanging with Mom, Dad and Brother is all that fun when there is so much other stuff to do. </p><p></p><p>Here are big (((huggles))) for your hurting mommy heart. I have a good book I recommend you read. It is helping me because I tend to get too involved in my kids and live and die with everything that happens to them and it isn't healthy for them or for me. This, by the way, includes my easy child kids. The book is: "Let Go Now" (embracing detachment) by Karen Casey. It's a very upbeat, common-sense book. On the cover it says (under t he title) "Set boundaries AND make your life your own." I've always been overly emotionally enmeshed in my kid's lives and it hasn't worked out too well for me. I'm not only a mess over the problems that husband and I have to face. I make myself doubly filled with anxiety by worrying over every bump in the road that my kids go through, and sometimes I do stuff like you do...such as checking FB. I am learning that I don't need to know everything any of my kids are doing or feeling. Then I'm not the best "me" I can be for my loved ones who need me OR for myself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 544124, member: 1550"] Sig, I am so sorry difficult child is doing this to you. And I KNOW how it feels first hand. I also wouldn't let him come between you and H. It's not worth it. In the end, you and H are all you will have. The kids leave, have their own families, etc. I also think it is very wise NOT to check his FB page because it's just going to upset you. There isn't anything you can do about it either. What he does, he does. Ditto for his cell phone calls (do you still pay for his cell phone?) That's something I would not do, considering his age and his actions. On a more positive note, some of what he is doing is pretty typical. A lot of adult kids no longer like to participate in family get togethers, especially when they are still in those early adult years (I am laughing at the word "adult"), but legally they are. They get more into their friends and whatever else is going on and don't think that hanging with Mom, Dad and Brother is all that fun when there is so much other stuff to do. Here are big (((huggles))) for your hurting mommy heart. I have a good book I recommend you read. It is helping me because I tend to get too involved in my kids and live and die with everything that happens to them and it isn't healthy for them or for me. This, by the way, includes my easy child kids. The book is: "Let Go Now" (embracing detachment) by Karen Casey. It's a very upbeat, common-sense book. On the cover it says (under t he title) "Set boundaries AND make your life your own." I've always been overly emotionally enmeshed in my kid's lives and it hasn't worked out too well for me. I'm not only a mess over the problems that husband and I have to face. I make myself doubly filled with anxiety by worrying over every bump in the road that my kids go through, and sometimes I do stuff like you do...such as checking FB. I am learning that I don't need to know everything any of my kids are doing or feeling. Then I'm not the best "me" I can be for my loved ones who need me OR for myself. [/QUOTE]
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Another non update (of course rambling and long)...confession at the end
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