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General Parenting
Anyone have a child diagnosed with bipolar?
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<blockquote data-quote="SearchingForRainbows" data-source="post: 508250" data-attributes="member: 3388"><p>When difficult child 1 was about the same age as your difficult child, he had failing grades in most of his classes, not because he couldn't do the work, just because he refused to do the work if he wasn't interested in the subject or if he didn't like the teacher. </p><p></p><p>Until difficult child 1 was properly diagnosed and receiving appropriate interventions and medication, nothing we tried made a difference in his attitude as far as school was concerned. We tried everything under the sun we could think of - We took away his computer time, his TV time, etc., etc., etc. This only infuriated him to the point of super "melt-downs," complete with throwing things, breaking things, verbalizing, etc,, etc., etc., that could last for hours on end. We tried sticker charts where he could "earn" computer time, etc. if he did his school work. It still didn't work. We still got the same fits of rage if he didn't "earn" stickers on a day when he was determined to use his computer. Unfortunately, he wanted his computer 24/7, 365 days a year... We tried natural consequences. Unfortunately, he didn't care if he flunked out of school. We were worn out to the point where we just thought we wanted him out of our lives, just wanted to put a free sign around his neck and leave him outside...</p><p></p><p>What I didn't understand at the time is that until we had an appropriate diagnosis, nothing, and I mean nothing would ever work. I didn't understand the thing that so many people here know, that a child wants to do well if he/she can. I can't stress how important this is. Until your difficult child is properly diagnosed, as long as he isn't physically hurting himself or others, isn't in dangerous situations, I would be easy on him, not force the school work. Five years ago I would never have believed that I would ever be giving this sort of advice!! Hang in there. It will get better!! Thinking of you today... SFR</p><p></p><p>P.S. From personal experience, we never found the school to be the least bit helpful when it came to choosing appropriate providers to do evaluations. I'm not sure what the laws are now regarding who picks up the tab for independent evaluations but my best advice is still the same. Research and use your own providers to do the evaluations.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SearchingForRainbows, post: 508250, member: 3388"] When difficult child 1 was about the same age as your difficult child, he had failing grades in most of his classes, not because he couldn't do the work, just because he refused to do the work if he wasn't interested in the subject or if he didn't like the teacher. Until difficult child 1 was properly diagnosed and receiving appropriate interventions and medication, nothing we tried made a difference in his attitude as far as school was concerned. We tried everything under the sun we could think of - We took away his computer time, his TV time, etc., etc., etc. This only infuriated him to the point of super "melt-downs," complete with throwing things, breaking things, verbalizing, etc,, etc., etc., that could last for hours on end. We tried sticker charts where he could "earn" computer time, etc. if he did his school work. It still didn't work. We still got the same fits of rage if he didn't "earn" stickers on a day when he was determined to use his computer. Unfortunately, he wanted his computer 24/7, 365 days a year... We tried natural consequences. Unfortunately, he didn't care if he flunked out of school. We were worn out to the point where we just thought we wanted him out of our lives, just wanted to put a free sign around his neck and leave him outside... What I didn't understand at the time is that until we had an appropriate diagnosis, nothing, and I mean nothing would ever work. I didn't understand the thing that so many people here know, that a child wants to do well if he/she can. I can't stress how important this is. Until your difficult child is properly diagnosed, as long as he isn't physically hurting himself or others, isn't in dangerous situations, I would be easy on him, not force the school work. Five years ago I would never have believed that I would ever be giving this sort of advice!! Hang in there. It will get better!! Thinking of you today... SFR P.S. From personal experience, we never found the school to be the least bit helpful when it came to choosing appropriate providers to do evaluations. I'm not sure what the laws are now regarding who picks up the tab for independent evaluations but my best advice is still the same. Research and use your own providers to do the evaluations. [/QUOTE]
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