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Arguing for the sake of arguing
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 238138" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Marf, you took the words right out of my mouth (well, keyboard).</p><p></p><p>Heather, she IS gonig to argue, she IS going to be oversensitive and highly reactive. You need to do your utmost to be the opposite. Be so laid back you look like you're almost falling asleep. Of course it's annoying, of course it's frustrting, but the more you react in dfence, the more frustrating and annoying it will be.</p><p></p><p>Why do you feel a need to prove yourself to A KID? I suspect you're reacting to her, almost as much as she is reacting (over-reacting) to whayt you say.</p><p></p><p>Someone needs to be the strong one, to say, "Enough!" and walk away. And we both know she won't.</p><p></p><p>By YOU being the one to walk away (figuratively, at least) you will hopefully be modelling this for her to learn, in her own interactions. Because somewhere in there, SHE needs to learn to "let it go".</p><p></p><p>OK, she probably shouldn't have worn eye makeup. But once it's on, then it's on. And maybe it's not such a big deal. But let the doctor be the one to tell her, she is more likely to listen to a doctor. Besides, that way someone else can be the baddie, not you.</p><p></p><p>Fran, while I really like your line, I think it would have been a mistake for Heather to use it, in this situation. Perhaps 'bank' that line for a better opportunity?</p><p></p><p>Let us know how the doctor appointment goes. I hope it's an easy fix, but sufficiently serious to justify your concerns.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 238138, member: 1991"] Marf, you took the words right out of my mouth (well, keyboard). Heather, she IS gonig to argue, she IS going to be oversensitive and highly reactive. You need to do your utmost to be the opposite. Be so laid back you look like you're almost falling asleep. Of course it's annoying, of course it's frustrting, but the more you react in dfence, the more frustrating and annoying it will be. Why do you feel a need to prove yourself to A KID? I suspect you're reacting to her, almost as much as she is reacting (over-reacting) to whayt you say. Someone needs to be the strong one, to say, "Enough!" and walk away. And we both know she won't. By YOU being the one to walk away (figuratively, at least) you will hopefully be modelling this for her to learn, in her own interactions. Because somewhere in there, SHE needs to learn to "let it go". OK, she probably shouldn't have worn eye makeup. But once it's on, then it's on. And maybe it's not such a big deal. But let the doctor be the one to tell her, she is more likely to listen to a doctor. Besides, that way someone else can be the baddie, not you. Fran, while I really like your line, I think it would have been a mistake for Heather to use it, in this situation. Perhaps 'bank' that line for a better opportunity? Let us know how the doctor appointment goes. I hope it's an easy fix, but sufficiently serious to justify your concerns. Marg [/QUOTE]
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