Back after a long time... question about my easy child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by forkeeps251, Jan 7, 2015.

  1. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    So.... I've posted on here before about my youngest son, who was eventually diagnosed with ADHD, depression and anxiety disorder, with a note to monitor for autism (also struggles with speech and social situations, repetitive behavior, etc).

    Things are actually going pretty good with him. He is on medicine that is working, thank goodness. He became a big brother in March and is responding REALLY well to it. And even his grades are decent, although he is still a few grade levels behind (he goes to resource for reading and math and is in speech therapy as well).

    The problem now lies with my oldest son, who is 12. Up until recently, he has gotten very good grades for very little effort. He is in the gifted and talented program, all Pre-AP classes, etc. Even scored a perfect score for math on one of his standardized tests.

    This year though, his grades have plummeted and his attitude sucks as well (no big surprise, as he's 12!). He has started picking his braces off, at his last appointment he has lost 7 brackets! I've been blaming it all on the fact that his is very disorganized, a little lazy, and not very motivated. However I've gotten a little feedback from teachers that he is playing around in class and has no clue what is going on because he hasn't been paying attention. He is very distracted much of the time, always in his head working on some latest "invention" he thinks he should make.

    Does this sound like a puberty problem, or is it possible to have slight ADD that is onset so late? With my youngest son we knew from the very start he was "different", although like I mentioned above he has more problems that just his focus.

    I just need an idea of where I should focus to help him... psychiatrist, counseling, tutoring...? Organization classes (does such a thing exist?)
  2. dstc_99

    dstc_99 Well-Known Member

    It almost sounds like he is bored. I remember a kid from school who had issues like that. He didn't do the work because it was boring. He would mess with things just to see if he could fix them or break them. He figured they were wasting his time at school since he already knew it all anyway.
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  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    ADD is not late onset. Sounds more like autistic spectrum because those kids do pick at stuff. Did your son ever have any speech or communication delays while young? Any problems making friends? Any obessions?

    My son would run his tongue around his lips until it was flame red and I had to get him a special cream.
  4. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    My first choice is to ditto dtsc - he might be bored out of his mind... and if he's bright enough to be that bored, at 12 he'll be heading into bullying, social problems and all sorts of ugly stuff.

    Second choice is like MWM... missed diagnosis, maybe spectrumish?
  5. Confused

    Confused Active Member

    I cant add anything new but agree with the bored part, puberty can be mixed in and possibly spectrum. Trust me, it amazed me about my daughter too. Up till 8th grade Honor roll, didnt miss day of school in years, but yet, social issues and hygiene issues were present, seemed only shy and or anxiety.My youngest was also diagnosed first and now the oldest.. well still diagnosing should I say.

    So you can have him try a little harder work, another activity or learning style and see how that goes, if not, get him tested. Good luck and hugs. Glad your youngest one is doing well, thats great news!! Him on the classes, you can find something that can help, there out there under various names, but just google it for your area. I typed in" organizers for students" and it should a seminar place not sure where.
  6. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    Thank you all... That is exactly what I wanted to know, if I should get him tested for ADD and it doesn't look like it.

    He never had any speech delays, in fact just the opposite. Socials skills are so-so... he is a bit of a "follower" and a little nerdy, perhaps, but he does have friends and gets along with kids his age, and he isn't terribly shy or anything.

    He may very well be bored, but I don't think it is because he isn't challenged, I think it is more because the courses he is taking don't interest him. He is into physics and mechanics right now, and doesn't see the correlation between his current classes and that. I'm sure if I put him in say, a robotics class or something, he would do very well. He keeps asking me to be homeschooled but I work outside the house and I don't know that is the best solution.

    The picking at his braces thing... the picking part isn't a new thing. He used to have sores and scabs all over his arms, because of picking. He has grown out of it but still has scars from it. My difficult child did this too, but not even as much.
  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Just to be safe, I'd take him to a neuropsychologist (and, if it were my kid, it would be a neuropsychologist and no other professional. They really do 6-10 hours of great, intensive testing and can catch kids on the margins of Aspergers). I think he has some signs such as precocious speech (a common trait), picking at things (another common trait that in Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) has nothing to do with is a stimulant), most Aspies are nerdy and like tehcnology and all of them struggle socially.

    The reason I'd test him is because if he feels different or left out, he could start to get into serious trouble, inlcluding drugs if it isn't found and as he continues to suffer socially. Many kids take drugs because they can fit in better if they are not so shy. This doesn't mean your kid has anything wrong...but I'm one of those moms who says "leave no stone unturned." You have some concerns. Trust that mom gut of yours and see if they are valid. To me, nothing beats Mom Gut.

    Good luck, whatever you decide to do.