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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 206118" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>So, it sounds like your daughter disrespected the teacher and the teacher responded very unprofessionally and unfairly.</p><p> </p><p>I agree that your daughter should write an apology. Explain to her that you understand why she was so upset but it did not give her the right to react with disrespect. Tell her that because she reacted as she did, the focus of the bad behavior was put onto her. If she had not reacted, then the bad behavior would have stayed with the teacher. I have told my son that he needs to do as the teacher asks and if he does not like it than ask the teacher about it later or talk to me. I am also working with him about not pulling bad behavior onto himself. That when he does/says certain things, people will look at him as the problem so he needs to try to keep the focus of the problem where it belongs and not make it bigger if at all possible.</p><p> </p><p>The teacher is definately not off the hook. She was way out of line. She is an adult and if she is concerned with your daughter's behavior, she could call a meeting with you. She has no right to give an automatic zero over this. The school better investigate her inability to work with kids - she gets too angry and takes things too personally.</p><p> </p><p>I would suggest a meeting with you, your daughter and the dean of students first. Your daughter should be able to give her side of the story without the teacher in the room (kids are often intimidated when the person they are reporting on is present). Help her give her viewpoint in a calm way. The more she can keep her personal feelings out of it (very hard for young people to understand and do) the better. She is not doing this because she hates this teacher, she is doing it because of the events that took place. Tell her it is o.k. to admit that the teacher's actions angered her and she is sorry she responded as she did but it was out of frustration.</p><p> </p><p>Then, you and the Dean of Students can talk to her about how her behavior added to and made the situation worse. The teacher will be confronted on this, but your daughter also needs to learn and grow from this.</p><p> </p><p>Bring the teacher in and go through things again. I think she owes your daughter an apology also for her rash reaction.</p><p> </p><p>Good luck - let us know how things go.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 206118, member: 5096"] So, it sounds like your daughter disrespected the teacher and the teacher responded very unprofessionally and unfairly. I agree that your daughter should write an apology. Explain to her that you understand why she was so upset but it did not give her the right to react with disrespect. Tell her that because she reacted as she did, the focus of the bad behavior was put onto her. If she had not reacted, then the bad behavior would have stayed with the teacher. I have told my son that he needs to do as the teacher asks and if he does not like it than ask the teacher about it later or talk to me. I am also working with him about not pulling bad behavior onto himself. That when he does/says certain things, people will look at him as the problem so he needs to try to keep the focus of the problem where it belongs and not make it bigger if at all possible. The teacher is definately not off the hook. She was way out of line. She is an adult and if she is concerned with your daughter's behavior, she could call a meeting with you. She has no right to give an automatic zero over this. The school better investigate her inability to work with kids - she gets too angry and takes things too personally. I would suggest a meeting with you, your daughter and the dean of students first. Your daughter should be able to give her side of the story without the teacher in the room (kids are often intimidated when the person they are reporting on is present). Help her give her viewpoint in a calm way. The more she can keep her personal feelings out of it (very hard for young people to understand and do) the better. She is not doing this because she hates this teacher, she is doing it because of the events that took place. Tell her it is o.k. to admit that the teacher's actions angered her and she is sorry she responded as she did but it was out of frustration. Then, you and the Dean of Students can talk to her about how her behavior added to and made the situation worse. The teacher will be confronted on this, but your daughter also needs to learn and grow from this. Bring the teacher in and go through things again. I think she owes your daughter an apology also for her rash reaction. Good luck - let us know how things go. [/QUOTE]
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