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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 420671" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>You did GREAT!!!</p><p> </p><p>I totally understand how you feel. thank you just opened an account on FB. He is 11 and asked first. He still LOVES club penguin - to the point that he saves his $$ up and will even ask for chores to earn $$ to be able to do some of the stuff you have to pay for. Mostly it is a game he and his bff really like and play "together' from their own computers/homes. Neither of my children who live in my home has ANYTHING online that I cannot see/get into. </p><p> </p><p>Your reasons for closing his account are exactly the ones that I would have and I would have closed the accounts also.</p><p> </p><p>I do NOT think that talking with your husband is even worth thinking about. It simply wouldn't be safe for you or the kids. I hope that you leave very soon - it simply isn't safe to continue living with your husband. </p><p> </p><p>Marg is right - your husband is trying to set up fights. He wants to fight so bad that he is actually arranging ways to upset your son. Showing your son the website that his cousin has is guaranteeing that your son will ask for one. No way your husband did not know this. NO. WAY. Then telling him that he cannot have one is instigating the fight. It is giving himself an "excuse" to yell, scream, hit and terrorize the entire family and esp this son. It shows that he knows on some level that his rages are out of line and that he is trying to find ways to rage that will be somehow "okay" and not abusive.</p><p> </p><p>I am glad to know that you have a plan. I hope it can be executed sooner rather than later. It must be so hard to be there when you know that soon you won't have to walk on eggshells in fear of his rage.</p><p> </p><p> If at all possible, take your children for an abuse exam after your husband's next rage. The mroe you can document his rages and how they hurt your children (even "just" mentally/emotionally) the more you can get the judge to order supervised visitation only. This is important as many places now give shared parenting to all divorced couples with children unless abuse is proven. If your cell phone has a video camera it might be an unobtrusive way to record his rage - but ONLY if you can do it in a way that does not further endanger either you or the kids.</p><p> </p><p>You have tons of support, encouragement, prayers and concern from all of us here. And guardian angels to protect you and the boys as you go through this waiting period, the exit, and as you settle into life without him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 420671, member: 1233"] You did GREAT!!! I totally understand how you feel. thank you just opened an account on FB. He is 11 and asked first. He still LOVES club penguin - to the point that he saves his $$ up and will even ask for chores to earn $$ to be able to do some of the stuff you have to pay for. Mostly it is a game he and his bff really like and play "together' from their own computers/homes. Neither of my children who live in my home has ANYTHING online that I cannot see/get into. Your reasons for closing his account are exactly the ones that I would have and I would have closed the accounts also. I do NOT think that talking with your husband is even worth thinking about. It simply wouldn't be safe for you or the kids. I hope that you leave very soon - it simply isn't safe to continue living with your husband. Marg is right - your husband is trying to set up fights. He wants to fight so bad that he is actually arranging ways to upset your son. Showing your son the website that his cousin has is guaranteeing that your son will ask for one. No way your husband did not know this. NO. WAY. Then telling him that he cannot have one is instigating the fight. It is giving himself an "excuse" to yell, scream, hit and terrorize the entire family and esp this son. It shows that he knows on some level that his rages are out of line and that he is trying to find ways to rage that will be somehow "okay" and not abusive. I am glad to know that you have a plan. I hope it can be executed sooner rather than later. It must be so hard to be there when you know that soon you won't have to walk on eggshells in fear of his rage. If at all possible, take your children for an abuse exam after your husband's next rage. The mroe you can document his rages and how they hurt your children (even "just" mentally/emotionally) the more you can get the judge to order supervised visitation only. This is important as many places now give shared parenting to all divorced couples with children unless abuse is proven. If your cell phone has a video camera it might be an unobtrusive way to record his rage - but ONLY if you can do it in a way that does not further endanger either you or the kids. You have tons of support, encouragement, prayers and concern from all of us here. And guardian angels to protect you and the boys as you go through this waiting period, the exit, and as you settle into life without him. [/QUOTE]
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