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Behavior Contracts & Points Systems
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<blockquote data-quote="Robinboots" data-source="post: 352683" data-attributes="member: 4542"><p>Oy. My opinion, too, is that it's too complicated and unnecessarily rigid. Esp. for a 9yo. You also mentioned your parenting style, which I pretty much disagree with in the first place, so you can take this for what it's worth.</p><p></p><p>I actually think so-called behavioral contracts are worthless.</p><p></p><p>There is no legal recourse, naturally, for a child; so why the "contract"? If you have rules, use natural consequences whenever possible; otherwise, have an immediate punishment ready. For example:</p><p>If he doesn't get up when called, buy him an alarm clock; if he still doesn't get up, yank off the covers, MAKE him get up. No third or fourth chances, just do it. </p><p>Let the teacher handle school issues.</p><p>Start a habit where he does homework IMMEDIATELY after dinner, in an accessible area of the house where you can keep an eye on him.</p><p></p><p>Kids need discipline, they need training, they need time to develop habits - good or bad. Assigning points to a 9yo with a rebate system, etc., is just asking for trouble. He'll be confused, you'll be overwhelmed, and it will fall apart in probably a week or two.</p><p></p><p>Again, in my humble opinion, but I am a writer and one of my strongest areas is child discipline. That said, some people report results with these "contracts". I'm very old-fashioned, and think that the parent's word is law, period, and children need to be taught to comply - not cajoled and bargained with.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Robinboots, post: 352683, member: 4542"] Oy. My opinion, too, is that it's too complicated and unnecessarily rigid. Esp. for a 9yo. You also mentioned your parenting style, which I pretty much disagree with in the first place, so you can take this for what it's worth. I actually think so-called behavioral contracts are worthless. There is no legal recourse, naturally, for a child; so why the "contract"? If you have rules, use natural consequences whenever possible; otherwise, have an immediate punishment ready. For example: If he doesn't get up when called, buy him an alarm clock; if he still doesn't get up, yank off the covers, MAKE him get up. No third or fourth chances, just do it. Let the teacher handle school issues. Start a habit where he does homework IMMEDIATELY after dinner, in an accessible area of the house where you can keep an eye on him. Kids need discipline, they need training, they need time to develop habits - good or bad. Assigning points to a 9yo with a rebate system, etc., is just asking for trouble. He'll be confused, you'll be overwhelmed, and it will fall apart in probably a week or two. Again, in my humble opinion, but I am a writer and one of my strongest areas is child discipline. That said, some people report results with these "contracts". I'm very old-fashioned, and think that the parent's word is law, period, and children need to be taught to comply - not cajoled and bargained with. [/QUOTE]
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