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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 291481" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /> Ah, the fun of it!</p><p></p><p>I truly believe spectrum kids develop late and get better at social skills as they get older. I can't promise for sure, but that's what happened with my son. He pretty much won't do "embarassing" things in public anymore. His type of social skills deficits are more subtle. For example, we took him to a friend's house for July 4th. He knows them well and is ok with people he knows. But we were all surprised that the group invited went beyond us and was actually a small crowd, with a lot of older teens that L. doesn't know. He didn't act out or fuss, but he sat in the back of the yard (we were outside) and in the grass. He had his PS2 handheld thingy (whatever it's called) with him, which we allowed because we know how nervous he gets in crowds. I don't think he looked up the entire time we were there and he only spoke when spoken to. In odd social situations, he is very awkward. With people he knows and is comfortable with, he participates almost normally. What if we hadn't let him bring his PS--whatever-it is? in my opinion it would have been cruel. He would have been more uncomfortable and shut down, and I know 100% that it wouldn't have encouraged him to socialize. He needs to do it on his own terms, at his own pace. His goal in life is to not get married (girls are too much trouble) <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /> and live with a big dog. He DOES have friends who are girls and went to prom (he very unhappily went to prom <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" />, but his best friend asked him and he has too good a heart to tell her no). </p><p></p><p>L. knows what you are supposed to do in social situations. I think he believes a lot of social norms are "stupid" but he goes through the motions and does the best he can. But he will never be a social butterfly, and hanging at the mall with friends will never be a fun thing for him. He needs his down time and alone time. </p><p></p><p>Why did I post this all? I'm not sure!!!! I guess I just wanted to vent and to tell you I understand and that your son, being only 11, will probably grow by leaps in bounds in the next five years. Having said that, he may not be a "typical" kid, but Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids tend to have huge hearts. Go with your instincts and watch him grow.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 291481, member: 1550"] :happy::raspberry-tounge: Ah, the fun of it! I truly believe spectrum kids develop late and get better at social skills as they get older. I can't promise for sure, but that's what happened with my son. He pretty much won't do "embarassing" things in public anymore. His type of social skills deficits are more subtle. For example, we took him to a friend's house for July 4th. He knows them well and is ok with people he knows. But we were all surprised that the group invited went beyond us and was actually a small crowd, with a lot of older teens that L. doesn't know. He didn't act out or fuss, but he sat in the back of the yard (we were outside) and in the grass. He had his PS2 handheld thingy (whatever it's called) with him, which we allowed because we know how nervous he gets in crowds. I don't think he looked up the entire time we were there and he only spoke when spoken to. In odd social situations, he is very awkward. With people he knows and is comfortable with, he participates almost normally. What if we hadn't let him bring his PS--whatever-it is? in my opinion it would have been cruel. He would have been more uncomfortable and shut down, and I know 100% that it wouldn't have encouraged him to socialize. He needs to do it on his own terms, at his own pace. His goal in life is to not get married (girls are too much trouble) :happy: and live with a big dog. He DOES have friends who are girls and went to prom (he very unhappily went to prom :happy:, but his best friend asked him and he has too good a heart to tell her no). L. knows what you are supposed to do in social situations. I think he believes a lot of social norms are "stupid" but he goes through the motions and does the best he can. But he will never be a social butterfly, and hanging at the mall with friends will never be a fun thing for him. He needs his down time and alone time. Why did I post this all? I'm not sure!!!! I guess I just wanted to vent and to tell you I understand and that your son, being only 11, will probably grow by leaps in bounds in the next five years. Having said that, he may not be a "typical" kid, but Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids tend to have huge hearts. Go with your instincts and watch him grow. [/QUOTE]
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