Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Big dip down on roller coaster ride..need support & ideas...no judgment
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 351052"><p>OMG! Wow.</p><p>WILL re-read. </p><p>We no longer pay out any significant money for difficult child. "Limited" is the word for the day...and we try very hard to keep it confined to health and personal safety issues. We often further limit that help to times where she has difficulties that are not necessarily of her own fault. Certainly not a perfect system. Like everyone else here, it's confusing and complicated and no one seems to have the right answers. We do like that difficult child seems to avoid drugs (she's been drug tested more than once...always clean) and is usually respectful. We cut off communication when is is not respectful or breaks rules.</p><p></p><p>Example: She is NOT to call my house on a week day before a certain time. Today, she called 15 mins. too early. I picked up the phone and hung up. Then, I took it off the hook for 30 mins. She texted me what she wanted and called back an hour later. I will NOT talk with her if she breaks a rule or is disrespectful. Period.</p><p></p><p>And I do my best to limit personal anguish to 24 hours. In fact, today, I am MUCH better. Yesterday, I limped along forcing myself to get what I personally needed done. Today, will be MUCH better (have high hopes that I can and will be FINE!). <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p><p>G-d blessed you with a wise mom. Your difficult child was blessed with one as well, he just doesn't recognize it or appreciate it. It is sad. It is <strong>his </strong>loss. He choses to not to do the work, albeit hard work, necessary to go forward in life. He might need medication, perhaps therapy. But one thing for sure, he has to want change. And he has to be respectful of those who are trying to help him. His choices, again, <strong>his loss.</strong></p><p></p><p>I know you will you will continue to make your Higher Power and your mother very proud, and put one foot in front of the other, hold your head up high, count your blessings, take heed from this blessed woman (your mom) and move forward in life with gusto as it should be. (hugs). by the way, please thank your mother for me as well!</p><p></p><p>p.s. Its gonna be hard, but I would do the same thing with- reference to the dog. It is sad. difficult child had a similar situation and by some MIRACLE I found a home for a cat of hers. She might have another situation coming up (although I did not take the cat personally and never will) and it wont likely have the same positive outcome (if you get my drift). Bottom line: You are a fair and reasonable woman. Your difficult child is not fair and reasonable. Anything but. Protect yourself. IT is time...it is past time. Not only should you close up shop due to lack of operating funds, but you deserve this.</p><p></p><p>Side note: Thank you TALAN for the wonderfully helpful PM!</p><p></p><p>Thank you again to everyone for your kind and helpful responses.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 351052"] OMG! Wow. WILL re-read. We no longer pay out any significant money for difficult child. "Limited" is the word for the day...and we try very hard to keep it confined to health and personal safety issues. We often further limit that help to times where she has difficulties that are not necessarily of her own fault. Certainly not a perfect system. Like everyone else here, it's confusing and complicated and no one seems to have the right answers. We do like that difficult child seems to avoid drugs (she's been drug tested more than once...always clean) and is usually respectful. We cut off communication when is is not respectful or breaks rules. Example: She is NOT to call my house on a week day before a certain time. Today, she called 15 mins. too early. I picked up the phone and hung up. Then, I took it off the hook for 30 mins. She texted me what she wanted and called back an hour later. I will NOT talk with her if she breaks a rule or is disrespectful. Period. And I do my best to limit personal anguish to 24 hours. In fact, today, I am MUCH better. Yesterday, I limped along forcing myself to get what I personally needed done. Today, will be MUCH better (have high hopes that I can and will be FINE!). :happy: G-d blessed you with a wise mom. Your difficult child was blessed with one as well, he just doesn't recognize it or appreciate it. It is sad. It is [B]his [/B]loss. He choses to not to do the work, albeit hard work, necessary to go forward in life. He might need medication, perhaps therapy. But one thing for sure, he has to want change. And he has to be respectful of those who are trying to help him. His choices, again, [B]his loss.[/B] I know you will you will continue to make your Higher Power and your mother very proud, and put one foot in front of the other, hold your head up high, count your blessings, take heed from this blessed woman (your mom) and move forward in life with gusto as it should be. (hugs). by the way, please thank your mother for me as well! p.s. Its gonna be hard, but I would do the same thing with- reference to the dog. It is sad. difficult child had a similar situation and by some MIRACLE I found a home for a cat of hers. She might have another situation coming up (although I did not take the cat personally and never will) and it wont likely have the same positive outcome (if you get my drift). Bottom line: You are a fair and reasonable woman. Your difficult child is not fair and reasonable. Anything but. Protect yourself. IT is time...it is past time. Not only should you close up shop due to lack of operating funds, but you deserve this. Side note: Thank you TALAN for the wonderfully helpful PM! Thank you again to everyone for your kind and helpful responses. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Big dip down on roller coaster ride..need support & ideas...no judgment
Top