Bra Shopping

[flutterbee]

Men, stop reading now. If you continue to read, I will hunt you down and hurt you.



So, it was time to do something about this torture device otherwise known as a bra. I have gained weight. The most obvious place I could tell was in my bra. I could not wait to get that damn thing off every time I wore it. I never liked them much to begin with, but this was just miserable.

So, we go bra shopping today. Start off with, shopping on weekends is soooo not my thing. I truly understand Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) in kids now because with whatever is going on with me, I have it (I was actually reading about the vestibular thing and it seems it can cause it - interesting, huh?). Agitated and irritable doesn't even begin to describe it. Let's just say it's a really good idea I don't own a gun.

We go to Penny's. For some strange and STUPID reason, this Penny's has their lingerie department on the lower level next to bedding and on the same level as men's clothing. Ladies clothing is on the upper level. And for some other strange and STUPID reason, women insist on bringing their men along lingerie shopping and then the men end up hanging out in the lingerie department while the women shop and try on various garments. I really don't like men in the lingerie department while I'm shopping for unmentionables. Call me a prude, if you want. I just don't like it. I'm not hanging around them while they're shopping for jock-straps.

And this one guy in particular...let's just say he needed a baseball bat upside the head. He's following his girlfriend/wife/whatever around telling her in great detail what he thinks she should get. I couldn't hear her - I'm hoping she had enough sense to be embarrassed by him - but, *everyone* could hear him. Then - get this - he plants himself directly in front of the fitting room entrance trying to convince his girlfriend/wife/whatever to come out and show him her bras as she tries them on. Did I mention I was cranky and irritable? I was not at all quiet in what I thought about a man standing directly in front of the open entrance to a women's fitting room in the lingerie department. I mean, ladies are having to walk past this guy to go into the fitting room and this guy doesn't have the class - nor the sense - to leave. At some point, someone must have said something because I saw him later sitting in a chair by the cashier. hehehehehehehehe

And then to top it all off I found all of 2 bras in my size. Apparently, when you are a certain size around the ribs, they expect your cup size to be bigger. And if I had had any boobs to begin with, i.e., when I was thin, that would probably be the case. But, I didn't. And I'm not that cup size with this rib size. And when I tried on those measly 2 bras, they were no better than my current torture device.

So, I looked for pull-on type bras. All of them were sports bras that are worn alone, not under a shirt. I found ONE brand of the pull-on type bra that was not a sports bra in two colors. I snatched them up. They offer minimal support and don't do much else, but they don't torture me. They'll do. At least I can say I'm wearing a bra. So there.

I believe I won't be doing this again for a long, long time. I'm also writing a letter to Penny's and asking who's brilliant idea was it to put the lingerie department next to bedding and men's clothing. Duh.



I won't go into the events of the other idiotic happenings while at the mall. I really don't do well with crowds - I always shopped weekday evenings. And with my sensory issues - it's really not pretty. But, I did get a pair of Dansko's shoes and a sweater from Christopher and Banks. So, it wasn't all bad. And Wynter was really good and appreciative when I got her another pair of arm warmers that she really, really wanted, but wasn't being pushy about. Wynter. Appreciative. Wow. Progress.

And as I'm typing this, Devon is picking his nose. Ugh. Guys are so gross.

 

[Wiped Out]

Heather,
Sorry for the not fun shopping experience. In general, I don't like shopping. Bra shopping, yuck! A couple of years ago I did decide to go to Victoria's Secret to get sized. Their bras are pricier than I really should spend but they fit better than any others I have ever bought.

Yeah for the sweater from Christopher & Banks! I love that store!

 

[flutterbee]

I used to *love* to shop and could shop all day long. Now, it's just exhausting. But, I've always hated bra shopping and would wear my bras to threads. Although, at one time I did find a style of bra from Victoria's Secret and would just order from online. With my size changing, I really needed to try them on this time.

But, I survived. Came home, put my jammies on and sat outside with instructions to be given some alone time. I didn't even want the dogs outside with me.

I did apologize to my mom for being such a B while shopping - not to her, just in general. All that sensory stuff really brings out the best in me. NOT.

 

[totoro]

Victorias Secret or Nordstrom are the only places to buy a bra... I know they are costly, but I am serious, I wash and air dry my, and they have last 4 years to far. So I figure 36$ bucks or so a bra is worth it. I buy the Body by Victoria:Ipex
SO comfortable...
I also just found a pull on bra, it is a sports bra but not super binding or tight, no uni-boob! It was from Target. They carry the Champion line now. It is their sports bra. I love it... I even sleep in it some nights. I can wear either bra with t-shirts as well.
I hate shopping also... now that I was fitted, yippee, at VS, I order them on-line when they have sales!

 

[susiestar]

I hate shopping now too. I totally understand your whole sensory thing. When we went to the vince gill concert I needed a bra. I rarely wear one. I went to Dillards because I thought they had the spanx line. The store I went to didn't. The saleslady was too interested in her boyfriend on the phone (hint - if you work retail don't do phone sex from the phone by your cash register. You get fired wehn customers complain.) to show me any other line. I had to potty, so I was by the customer service desk. I complained. BIG TIME. I don't want to listen to phone sex. Period. ick.

anyway, I found a camisole thingy made out of material similar to spanx. It really feels good to wear. I also LOVE the spanx bras. They really feel good.

VS bras never work for me. OR Jessie. I refuse to take Jessie bra shopping. Ever. Again. Gma can take her. She is a WITCH when I take her -won't try on, nothing. But iwth Gma she is an angel, trys them on, gives good feedback, everything. ARGGHH. At least I have a mom to take her. LOL!

Anyway, I TOTALLY understand your rough day shopping. I hope you feel better soon!

Susie

 

[muttmeister]

When I was a 36 DDD I used to HATE bra shopping. Even when I found one in my size it didn't really fit and they were uncomfortable and ugly and cost a fortune. Then I had breast reduction surgery. Now I wear a 36 C and I buy my bras for under $10 at WalMart and I have them in all styles and colors and they are cute and cheap and relatively comfortable and I don't even have to try them on. But truth be told: when I am at home by myself I rarely wear one anyway. Whoever came up with the idea for bras was no doubt a man and should have been shot at sunrise.

 

[mrscatinthehat]

I just broke the wire in my favorite bra the other day. I hate to go bra shopping because it is depressing. I am one of those sizes that I can never find anything even remotely comfortable or that looks like something I would want to wear. I so understand not wanting to do it. Ugh, Ugh, Ugh.

beth

 

[KTMom91]

I feel your pain, Heather. I've avoided bra shopping for much too long, and finally broke down today. I've gone up two sizes...no, not cup sizes. Not being able to do much exercising since June has added up. When we got back in the car, I fell apart, crying, "I'm so fat, I'm so fat..."

 

[Hound dog]

Don't. Even. Mention. Bra. Shopping. To. Me. UGH!

Whoever came up with the idea for bras was no doubt a man and should have been shot at sunrise.

I said that the when my mother forced me to put one on the first time, and probably a billion times since. Saying that I hate them doesn't begin to describe it.

When I walk in the front door the bra is off within 3 mins. If you come visit me, odds are I won't be wearing one. My house, and I'm gonna be comfortable. *note if you're visiting me and I am wearing one, you're a mighty special guest*

Personally, I'd like to strangle the person/persons responsible for the underwire. Who in their right mind would come up with such a thing? And now finding a bra without the darn underwire is light finding a needle in a haystack.......and finding that bra without the underwire in your size is monumental. By the time I've finally managed to find one I feel like I deserve a metal or something.

Nichole decided she had to have a new bra when we went to walmart the last time. The girl is almost as blessed as Dolly Parton and is under 5 feet. Finding a bra in her size is almost impossible. She. Will. Not. Try. Them. On. Bit of paranoia on her part. lol So it took an eternity. And I'm thinking......ok, so I could've used a new one a couple of years ago.....I'll just casually look and see if there are no underwire ones in my size. Yeah, ok. Our walmart has recently re-arranged the store, and added to the bra dept. Now it's huge. Isle after Ilse of underwires. Very few without......and of course none in my size. Nichole found one for herself. But I wound up once again just throwing up my hands and walking away.

As to why the longerie dept is located next to the bedding....... 2+2=4. lol

(((hugs))) You deserve a medal.

 

[flutterbee]

Well, shoot, T. I went to Target before I went to Penny's, but I didn't look at bras at Target. I'll have to do that. The ones I got are comfortable, but they're no support and definitely not going to...hmmm...hide anything should I, say, get cold. I'll look for the Spanx ones, too, Susie.

I had these really great ones that were pull-overs when I was pregnant with Devon. They were the only thing I could stand to wear because my boobs were so sore. I haven't been able to find them for years.

And, yeah, the underwire. WTH??? Even when I was thin and had nothing, I had to search for the bras with no underwire. What possible purpose could an underwire in an A cup serve??? Except as a torture device. Honestly, the only thing I've found underwire to do is cut into me. They've never done anything else. What is it that it's supposed to do? I just don't get it.

But, that guy standing square in front of the open entrance to the ladies fitting room in the lingerie department about threw me over the edge. I mean smack dab in the middle. What a creep.

Gee. Can't wait to go do this again.

Shoe shopping. *That* I can do. Even if I can't wear most of them anymore cause of my back and hips. I have soooo many pairs of sexy heels that are just waiting for me patiently in my closet. The Dansko's are wonderful, though. Feel like heaven on my feet.

 

[Marguerite]

I love a good underwire bra. But it has to be a good one. I find I'm more comfortable in them than any other bra because they don't try to cut me in half round the ribs in order to stop slipping up. A bad underwire bra - no way, I just want to destroy the idiot who designed it.

With our stores, we do have the occasional specialty store which charges like a wounded bull but otherwise we can get good deals on quality bras in the big stores as well as the smaller specialty shops. I go to the good department stores and ask for a personal fitting. With all the weight I've lost, I've had to keep buying more bras as I go down in size. I would drop a cup size and need another bra. They often tried to sell me more than one bra but I would refuse; I'll wear an older, larger bra for the day my new bra is in the wash.

girlfriend (difficult child 1's fiancee) is of islander extract and has the figure to match, like a Gaugain painting. Think - Lilo's sister in "Lilo & Stitch". But she has a helluva time with bras, she has to buy a new one every month because they just don't last, not even the expensive ones. She's very self-conscious in her bikini - it's difficult having a figure like hers and being so shy.

If I break an underwire of a favourite bra I then go out and buy another bra of the same make and model. I keep the old bra. If another wire goes, I just take apart one bra and put the undamaged wire in, so I can make a good bra from two damaged ones.

easy child was murder to bra-shop with. Refused anything remotely pretty; she was trying to deny the need to become a woman, I think. Now - she loves pretty things.

easy child 2/difficult child 2 was murder in a different way; she was a late developer who looked very young (still does). She wanted the curvy look but had nothing up top, not even "light switches" as my sister refers to her own flat chest. We finally were able to get a couple of bras from a specialty shop which gave her coverage and a slight amount of shape. Now she goes for the full padded look - a female impersonator wouldn't wear more padding. She does have boobs now, but complains about them. However, she's so slim that bigger boobs would just look wrong.

Another option, Heather, which easy child 2/difficult child 2 has used especially for revealing dresses - the stick-on bra. You can get them with padding and cleavage enhancement as well; a little 'thing' in the front cinches up and pulls the boobs together for cleavage, but with no shoulder straps or back strap.

As for who invented bras - the modern bra has changed over the years but I think the person most responsible for what we have now, is Howard Hughes. He designed something to make Jane Russell look as good as possible. A sheepdog bra, as I call it. It rounds them up and points them in the right direction.

Marg

 

[flutterbee]

I think I'm going to have to break down and get professionally fitted. When I was thin, I was self-conscious about getting fitted because I was so small up top. Now with my weight, I'm just self-conscious over my body. But, I'll just have to get over it and get fitted.

Who else besides VS does bra fittings?

 

[totoro]

I think Nordstrom has fitters. Even though the VS secret fitting was over the top! The woman was good! She brought me in like 24 bras and MADE me try them on... I was whining the whole time. She felt me up, pulled pushed and made sure they fit. But it was very professional and she was funny, cracking post baby jokes etc.
She asked what types of shirts I wear etc.
I bought 3 bras that day 4 years ago... I still have them. So now I look for the same style when they are on sale, online.
I also have a couple of the pull on ones from Target! My new favorites.

 

[Abbey]

Ok. I thought we had covered this topic. YOU DO NOT NEED TO WEAR A BRA!!

Maybe it's the hippie in me, but I refuse to conform to this issue. *IF* I do, I use it as a tool...like a guy's tool belt. You've all heard what I can put in that thing. I don't think the VS gal would understand the need for a box cutter, cell phone, pen, backup pen, kleenex, code cheat sheet for work, Altoids, lighter and emergency cig to go in there. Otherwise, I just wear a spaghetti strap top under nearly everything. Don't like it? Offended? Don't look.

So maybe sometimes there's a little extra bounce in my walk, or my headlights are on. I could give a rat's patootie. Why don't you worry about starving children in Africa, for gosh sakes.

Heather, I've been on hunting season for years for whomever developed that thing. It's probably the same person whose brilliant idea was to have women wear high heeled shoes. B@astard.

Abbey

 

[goldenguru]

Ok. I thought we had covered this topic. YOU DO NOT NEED TO WEAR A BRA!!

OH YES I DO!! If I didn't, I would be in danger of causing harm to self or others.

I even sleep in one.

*sigh* I envy small breasted women who have the choice to go braless.

Women who are 'well endowed' do not have the luxury

 

[Marguerite]

GG, I'm with you. So is difficult child 1's girlfriend. Large girls cannot go braless without causing pain - to ourselves or to others. girlfriend would cause major traffic pile-ups if she went braless, as well as give herself two black eyes.

I remember going bra-less in the hippie era. One particularly hot summer's day I was playing snooker at uni, wearing a black cheesecloth peasant blouse and feeling confident that nobody had noticed the lack of bra, even when I bent over the table. I really don't know how I could have failed to notice - I didn't win that game because of skill. It was all the other guys, playing really badly.

I wore a singlet top yesterday, the kind with a shelf bra built in. Even that was barely enough. I was selling tickets in a ticket box and was increasingly aware that because of the "droop of ages" plus strap elastic not up to the job, my boobs and neckline were disappearing below the level of the window of the ticket box. The lower it all dropped, the more naked I looked.

We sold a lot of tickets, though.

Marg

 

[GoingNorth]

Actually, women who are "well endowed" DO have the choice to go bra-less.

The only time I wear one is if I am engaging in activity where "bounce" is uncomfortable to me (such as horseback riding) and then it is a utilitarian sports bra.

Before sports bras I used to strap the girls down with an ace bandage.

Not wearing a bra does not damage breast tissue nor increase the risk of tumors. Likewise, underwires or bras do not increase the risks of breast diseases.

It's all about how YOU are most comfortable!

 

[Fran]

Sorry ladies, I am very uncomfortable without supports in place. I have to wear a solid strong bra. Maybe that's why I don't mind. It's uncomfortable to not wear one.
Once you find a brand that works, I order on line. Undies too.

 

[Lothlorien]

I NEEEEEEED to wear one too. Though I hate them and when I find one that fits comfortably, after I wash them several times, they end up uncomfortable. Ticks me off, too, since the ones I have to buy end up costing me 30 bucks or so. Trust me, you don't want me out in public without one! If I had the money, I'd get a reduction in a heartbeat. I had to run to the bus one morning to give Missy someting that she forgot....I almost got two black eyes...not a pretty site.

 

[goldenguru]

Actually, women who are "well endowed" DO have the choice to go bra-less.

The only time I wear one is if I am engaging in activity where "bounce" is uncomfortable to me

LOL. I suppose (technically speaking)I do have 'the choice'. But, let me tell you I'm not dealing with a little "bounce" - it's the sway and centrifugal force that scares me.

It would not be socially acceptable for me to go braless. Trust me on this.