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Substance Abuse
Catching up....
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 67676" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Mikey, as the wife of a man who previously was not only *not* on the same page but was in a completely different book many many years ago... you need to turn it completely over to wife now. She has effectively tied your hands in terms of forcing the issue or applying anything even remotely logical in terms of consequences. She asks what can you do but at the same time won't let you do what you *can*, and then gets mad at you just for extra measure (trust me, been there done that, I understand the dynamics unfortunately). It's an impossible situation and it's time to completely back away from McWeedy and let wife deal with it. But that means that the next time he takes her car, credit cards, phone, she cannot look to you to solve the problem within *her* limits. She needs to do it. The next time he blows off curfew and doesn't answer the phone, *she* needs to be the one monitoring the phone bill and losing sleep. You can support and empathize but I wouldn't go much further than that. You will need to put the blinders on and bite your tongue a lot. </p><p></p><p>I'm not criticizing her at all - I totally understand that she doesn't want to force the issue for whatever reason. But if she is going to place limits on what the consequences for his behavior are, then she needs to be the one to deal with the behaviors, completely. </p><p></p><p>Just my opinion.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 67676, member: 8"] Mikey, as the wife of a man who previously was not only *not* on the same page but was in a completely different book many many years ago... you need to turn it completely over to wife now. She has effectively tied your hands in terms of forcing the issue or applying anything even remotely logical in terms of consequences. She asks what can you do but at the same time won't let you do what you *can*, and then gets mad at you just for extra measure (trust me, been there done that, I understand the dynamics unfortunately). It's an impossible situation and it's time to completely back away from McWeedy and let wife deal with it. But that means that the next time he takes her car, credit cards, phone, she cannot look to you to solve the problem within *her* limits. She needs to do it. The next time he blows off curfew and doesn't answer the phone, *she* needs to be the one monitoring the phone bill and losing sleep. You can support and empathize but I wouldn't go much further than that. You will need to put the blinders on and bite your tongue a lot. I'm not criticizing her at all - I totally understand that she doesn't want to force the issue for whatever reason. But if she is going to place limits on what the consequences for his behavior are, then she needs to be the one to deal with the behaviors, completely. Just my opinion. [/QUOTE]
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