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Christmas burdened? Know why? Discussion.
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 223627" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Star</p><p> </p><p>I'm an odd one. in my opinion birthdays and major holidays are off limits for punishment. I've always been that way. This of course doesn't include St. Patricks day ect. This is for easy child and difficult child alike. Birthdays and major holidays hype up <strong>all </strong>children. All. My kids knew that these days were "freebies" for them. That doesn't mean that punishment couldn't come the day before or after if the behavior was bad enough. lol <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p> </p><p>Maybe I was lucky. Because my kids never took advantage of the freebie rule. Sure they got hyped up to the max, most especially Travis. A birthday or major holiday always brought out every difficult child behavior the boy ever had. But no big offenses to speak of. We usually survived every holiday and even managed to have some happy memories as well.</p><p> </p><p>My kids have never gotten alot for either birthdays or xmas. I set a limit while pregnant with easy child and it stayed that way. Still is. I've just readjusted it to fit adult children and grandchildren. Each of them were required to buy a gift for whomever's birthday it was and for everyone for xmas. And they had to work for the money.</p><p> </p><p>*note* I'm making a new rule for presents that have to be sent via mail. I'm staring at 4 boxes (large) for the grands in Mo. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/faint.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":faint:" title="faint :faint:" data-shortname=":faint:" /> It's gonna cost me at least an additional 80.00 to just send them. OMG But easy child, Travis, and Nichole have been told they're helping with shipping. Many of these gifts are from them too. So from now on, Nana is buying no more than 2 presents for any child that has to have them shipped. I might include a gift card with any left over money from the budget. (notice I said might, that's gonna depend on how much this runs me this year)</p><p> </p><p>Travis can't help the way he is. I knew when he was little he couldn't help the way he is. He's just Travis, the way God made him. Period. At 22 he can get just as hyped up over xmas as he did as a child. Sure, there are days when I'd love to strangle him. There are days when I wish he could have his own place and I could find some peace. But he is who he is. And I've come to accept that is not going to change.</p><p> </p><p>That said......As Janet said......Age and maturity make all the difference. I no longer have to deal with a child literally talking at the top of his lungs and bouncing off all the furniture. Or one who gets up into everyone's face because he's just too excited to remember personal space. I no longer have to deal with Nichole believing the world revolves around her and her moods. She has, instead, been working hard to make this years holidays enjoyable for everyone else.</p><p> </p><p>And when we get together....the bickering is long gone. There are smiles and laughter and stories of holidays and birthdays past. It's not perfect. No Norman Rockwell here. But then we've never expected it to be. It's just much more pleasant and fun. And I've noticed for the most part......both easy child and Nichole have continued the Freebie rule concerning major holidays and bdays. lol</p><p> </p><p>Just a few years ago when they were all teens and I wanted to bang all their heads together. I wouldn't have believed it. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/rofl.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":rofl:" title="rofl :rofl:" data-shortname=":rofl:" /></p><p> </p><p>Merry Christmas Starbie.</p><p> </p><p>((hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 223627, member: 84"] Star I'm an odd one. in my opinion birthdays and major holidays are off limits for punishment. I've always been that way. This of course doesn't include St. Patricks day ect. This is for easy child and difficult child alike. Birthdays and major holidays hype up [B]all [/B]children. All. My kids knew that these days were "freebies" for them. That doesn't mean that punishment couldn't come the day before or after if the behavior was bad enough. lol ;) Maybe I was lucky. Because my kids never took advantage of the freebie rule. Sure they got hyped up to the max, most especially Travis. A birthday or major holiday always brought out every difficult child behavior the boy ever had. But no big offenses to speak of. We usually survived every holiday and even managed to have some happy memories as well. My kids have never gotten alot for either birthdays or xmas. I set a limit while pregnant with easy child and it stayed that way. Still is. I've just readjusted it to fit adult children and grandchildren. Each of them were required to buy a gift for whomever's birthday it was and for everyone for xmas. And they had to work for the money. *note* I'm making a new rule for presents that have to be sent via mail. I'm staring at 4 boxes (large) for the grands in Mo. :knockedout: It's gonna cost me at least an additional 80.00 to just send them. OMG But easy child, Travis, and Nichole have been told they're helping with shipping. Many of these gifts are from them too. So from now on, Nana is buying no more than 2 presents for any child that has to have them shipped. I might include a gift card with any left over money from the budget. (notice I said might, that's gonna depend on how much this runs me this year) Travis can't help the way he is. I knew when he was little he couldn't help the way he is. He's just Travis, the way God made him. Period. At 22 he can get just as hyped up over xmas as he did as a child. Sure, there are days when I'd love to strangle him. There are days when I wish he could have his own place and I could find some peace. But he is who he is. And I've come to accept that is not going to change. That said......As Janet said......Age and maturity make all the difference. I no longer have to deal with a child literally talking at the top of his lungs and bouncing off all the furniture. Or one who gets up into everyone's face because he's just too excited to remember personal space. I no longer have to deal with Nichole believing the world revolves around her and her moods. She has, instead, been working hard to make this years holidays enjoyable for everyone else. And when we get together....the bickering is long gone. There are smiles and laughter and stories of holidays and birthdays past. It's not perfect. No Norman Rockwell here. But then we've never expected it to be. It's just much more pleasant and fun. And I've noticed for the most part......both easy child and Nichole have continued the Freebie rule concerning major holidays and bdays. lol Just a few years ago when they were all teens and I wanted to bang all their heads together. I wouldn't have believed it. :rofl: Merry Christmas Starbie. ((hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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