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General Parenting
cleaned difficult child's drawers out and found
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 229118" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">Jennifer, that just svcks. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">I had a very odd thing going on during adolescence (and still) that I knew nothing about, how it happened, why it happened or that it happened to anyone other than me. It started when I was 15 and I didn't even know it had a name until I was 24 and found out by accident. I felt like everywhere I went I stood out like a sore thumb and that everyone I met was mocking me or thought I was ugly with a capital U. I always felt like the odd person out, in some circles, like a complete loser and ugly as all get out. I still wonder how I ever landed a boyfriend past the age of 15, let alone 2 husbands. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">Come to find out...I am not fat and I am not ugly. But I do have a condition that I think about on a daily basis and still makes me wonder if I truly fit in with others. But it doesn't define who I am - and that is key.</span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">I am not taking away from what your daughter is feeling by any means. At all - because her feelings are legitimate and real and affecting her and those who love her (you). What happens next is what's most important. My parents were truly at a loss as to what they should do and as a result, they were retards, I swear. They shamed and humiliated me in the hopes that I would 'snap out of it'. Nope, didn't work. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">As your daughter's parent, what you can try to do is help her find ways in which she can feel better about herself and help her create opportunities where she will garner praise and admiration. Not false ones either. I made that mistake with my own difficult child when we were initially trying to help her with her self esteem. Whatever it is that she can feel good about must be genuine and not forced. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">Ultimately, your daughter has to find a way to accept herself and it may not happen today or tomorrow or next month. You can help, but she needs to find her own way. Adolescence truly does svck. Ugh, I hated it.</span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">Plus, you're working against the tide here because she's at a wierd age where she may reject any ideas you have. And our poor kiddos have images thrown at them from the media telling them what they should look like or how they should be behave in order to be accepted and cool. It's sickening. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: navy">Sending hugs - I'm so sorry that she's having those feelings. </span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 229118, member: 2211"] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Jennifer, that just svcks. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]I had a very odd thing going on during adolescence (and still) that I knew nothing about, how it happened, why it happened or that it happened to anyone other than me. It started when I was 15 and I didn't even know it had a name until I was 24 and found out by accident. I felt like everywhere I went I stood out like a sore thumb and that everyone I met was mocking me or thought I was ugly with a capital U. I always felt like the odd person out, in some circles, like a complete loser and ugly as all get out. I still wonder how I ever landed a boyfriend past the age of 15, let alone 2 husbands. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Come to find out...I am not fat and I am not ugly. But I do have a condition that I think about on a daily basis and still makes me wonder if I truly fit in with others. But it doesn't define who I am - and that is key.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]I am not taking away from what your daughter is feeling by any means. At all - because her feelings are legitimate and real and affecting her and those who love her (you). What happens next is what's most important. My parents were truly at a loss as to what they should do and as a result, they were retards, I swear. They shamed and humiliated me in the hopes that I would 'snap out of it'. Nope, didn't work. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]As your daughter's parent, what you can try to do is help her find ways in which she can feel better about herself and help her create opportunities where she will garner praise and admiration. Not false ones either. I made that mistake with my own difficult child when we were initially trying to help her with her self esteem. Whatever it is that she can feel good about must be genuine and not forced. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Ultimately, your daughter has to find a way to accept herself and it may not happen today or tomorrow or next month. You can help, but she needs to find her own way. Adolescence truly does svck. Ugh, I hated it.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Plus, you're working against the tide here because she's at a wierd age where she may reject any ideas you have. And our poor kiddos have images thrown at them from the media telling them what they should look like or how they should be behave in order to be accepted and cool. It's sickening. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Sending hugs - I'm so sorry that she's having those feelings. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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cleaned difficult child's drawers out and found
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