klmno
Active Member
difficult child got commitment to state juvy. My show cause had not been processed yet so it only came up when attny's told the judge that it was filed because I refused to obey her order. difficult child testified about cutting and so forth- he did himself more harm than good- his attny should have prepped him better about wording. I testified that I only needed a Certificate of Need to have him admitted directly into Residential Treatment Center (RTC).
While I was on the stand, the CA asked me questions that I thought odd but after I was offf the stand and heard about the memo that PO had just sent out, they make sense. The CA asked about a week difficult child had missed school prior to Dec. I told her it was due to physical illness, I took him to dr and submitted a note from dr to school. She asked about previous mst order and I explained that we did cooperate, then I had MDE done and brought recommendations to court and mst order was removed and judge allowed us to pursue those treatments recommendations on out-patient basis. She asked when they stopped. I said they didn't stop- they continued until difficult child was arrested and when he was held, I had to call and cancel scheduled appts. She asked if when difficult child was in psychiatric hospital in Dec and Jan, did I notify the PO. I said yes I had called the day after both times, and the second time the psychiatric hospital had tried to contact her but she never responded. She asked if difficult child had ever been tdo'd from school. I said no. (I should have thought to tell them that they had called me before and told me to come and get him because he was completely out of control.) She asked if he'd only been tdo'd from home. At first I said yes, then I corrected that because I remembered that his first two stays in phhosp had been by a parental placement and tdo when we were physically at the county mental health dept.
Then, the GAL brought up that the PO, who was not there, had sent a memo to all the attny's this morning that said the local detention program would not accept difficult child because of the charge being considered violent. She also said I had been uncooperative and refused services they had tried to offer and that I was more of a problem for difficult child than a solution. They seemed to all think- even the judge said- that the PO had gone out of her ways many times to go to batt for difficult child. (I am completely clueless how they justify this- those statements from the PO are lies and maybe people just assume she's telling the truth.)
The GAL said that dss would be required to place difficult child with a family member- so the GAL was wrong about that before. She ssaid she did not think that would be appropriate and that since it appeared that "the mom" was the type of person who made things her way or the highway, she was concerned that I would pull difficult child from Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if I didn't like their program. Actually, I'm not sure if she was trying to relay that as her concern or the PO's. In any case, the GAL said the only other option was commitment to state juvy. So that's what the judge did, with an order that they treat difficult child for mental health. Whatever that means. They would have had to keep a psychiatrist minimally involved for rx's anyway, so I don't see that order mental health doing anything any different. He will be on parole when he gets out.
Oh- the GAL said that I had done a lot to try to address difficult child's mental health issues but had not done anything to address my own and they thought that was a problem. Notice how when I was on the stand, she didn't ask me IF I was doing anything for my own and she made that statement afterwards, knowing I could not speak to it. She does know that I've been seeing a therapist. Maybe this was her way of giving the judge a doubt that difficult child doesn't deserve state juvy, but GAL didn't bring up any other option so I guess things turned out the way she wanted.
difficult child's defense attny asked me if I wanted him to appeal, he said he doubted he'd win an appeal, the time to wait for it would cause difficult child more time in juvy, and the only option another judge would consider would be to turn difficult child over to dss/family. I told him to leeave it up to difficult child. difficult child said don't appeal.
I asked defense attny if I could get a copy of the memo from the PO. He said he didn't think so because I'm not privy to statements made by officers of the court. He said that the problem with Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was that the court had no faith in me. I said that's why I wanted a copy of that memo- if there are things in it that aren't true, how can I address them? How can the issue of my competency as a parent ever get addressed if it never gets to a point where specific questions are asked to determine which one of us- PO or me- was making good or bad decisions or who's telling the truth. He said he's not my attny and cannot address that.
So, I will get an attny assigned for the show-cause. I'll ask him/her. It might not get anywhere because that person will only be involved for the one court order I broke. Plus, a court appointment attny might never doubt the word of a PO. The GAL said that the psychiatric evaluation could have revealed "what's really going on at the root of the problem but mom refused it" and it was too bad. Obviously, they are trying to make me feel like difficult child being committed to state juvy is all because of that refusal. I will never buy that. (Keep in mind- what was going to be given was a written personality test to see where I deeviate from the norm- no personal history or interview/oral assessment.) Sending him home with a court orders for me was not the right answer for this. Plus, they already had those opinions of me, anything that might have showed up on that test would have made that worse and could have gotten difficult child into dss if they had some diagnosis that made me look horrible. Plus, if it had come back not showing anything major, it would have made difficult child look worse. I have no idea why the GAL felt it was better for difficult child to be committed to state juvy than to allow me to place difficult child into Residential Treatment Center (RTC).
It is so hard for me to believe that she really believes that. She told me herself that she had tried to talk to PO and that PO was a person who just didn't believe in mental health issues. She also told me on the phone just this past Friday that she agreed that Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was the best and most appropriate place for difficult child. So why go in there and portray it like I might not cooperate and pull difficult child from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? And say that I wouldn't deal with my own issues? It sounded like she was speaking for the PO.
The judge said regardless of the issues between PO and me, difficult child was on suspended sentence and if he couldn't go to local program then he was committed to the state. She said she had to protect the public.
Supposedly, they are doing a mental health evaluation on difficult child today to see if he should be tdo'd. It seems like another situation where someone- the PO- waited until right before court to submit something to shake things up and no one had time to look into the truth of things first.
Am I off-base in thinking the PO wanted difficult child committed to state to get back at me? Any ideas why gal would go along with this? Was she just putting on a he11 of an act when she talked to me on Friday?
Ok- I have known all along that PO has always thought all difficult child's problems were just me. Look at the parental choices she told me to make- that therapist/psychiatrist disagreed with and supported my decisions about. Why didn't the GAL look into this stuff before today? She knew this conflict existed.
Sorry this is so long.
While I was on the stand, the CA asked me questions that I thought odd but after I was offf the stand and heard about the memo that PO had just sent out, they make sense. The CA asked about a week difficult child had missed school prior to Dec. I told her it was due to physical illness, I took him to dr and submitted a note from dr to school. She asked about previous mst order and I explained that we did cooperate, then I had MDE done and brought recommendations to court and mst order was removed and judge allowed us to pursue those treatments recommendations on out-patient basis. She asked when they stopped. I said they didn't stop- they continued until difficult child was arrested and when he was held, I had to call and cancel scheduled appts. She asked if when difficult child was in psychiatric hospital in Dec and Jan, did I notify the PO. I said yes I had called the day after both times, and the second time the psychiatric hospital had tried to contact her but she never responded. She asked if difficult child had ever been tdo'd from school. I said no. (I should have thought to tell them that they had called me before and told me to come and get him because he was completely out of control.) She asked if he'd only been tdo'd from home. At first I said yes, then I corrected that because I remembered that his first two stays in phhosp had been by a parental placement and tdo when we were physically at the county mental health dept.
Then, the GAL brought up that the PO, who was not there, had sent a memo to all the attny's this morning that said the local detention program would not accept difficult child because of the charge being considered violent. She also said I had been uncooperative and refused services they had tried to offer and that I was more of a problem for difficult child than a solution. They seemed to all think- even the judge said- that the PO had gone out of her ways many times to go to batt for difficult child. (I am completely clueless how they justify this- those statements from the PO are lies and maybe people just assume she's telling the truth.)
The GAL said that dss would be required to place difficult child with a family member- so the GAL was wrong about that before. She ssaid she did not think that would be appropriate and that since it appeared that "the mom" was the type of person who made things her way or the highway, she was concerned that I would pull difficult child from Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if I didn't like their program. Actually, I'm not sure if she was trying to relay that as her concern or the PO's. In any case, the GAL said the only other option was commitment to state juvy. So that's what the judge did, with an order that they treat difficult child for mental health. Whatever that means. They would have had to keep a psychiatrist minimally involved for rx's anyway, so I don't see that order mental health doing anything any different. He will be on parole when he gets out.
Oh- the GAL said that I had done a lot to try to address difficult child's mental health issues but had not done anything to address my own and they thought that was a problem. Notice how when I was on the stand, she didn't ask me IF I was doing anything for my own and she made that statement afterwards, knowing I could not speak to it. She does know that I've been seeing a therapist. Maybe this was her way of giving the judge a doubt that difficult child doesn't deserve state juvy, but GAL didn't bring up any other option so I guess things turned out the way she wanted.
difficult child's defense attny asked me if I wanted him to appeal, he said he doubted he'd win an appeal, the time to wait for it would cause difficult child more time in juvy, and the only option another judge would consider would be to turn difficult child over to dss/family. I told him to leeave it up to difficult child. difficult child said don't appeal.
I asked defense attny if I could get a copy of the memo from the PO. He said he didn't think so because I'm not privy to statements made by officers of the court. He said that the problem with Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was that the court had no faith in me. I said that's why I wanted a copy of that memo- if there are things in it that aren't true, how can I address them? How can the issue of my competency as a parent ever get addressed if it never gets to a point where specific questions are asked to determine which one of us- PO or me- was making good or bad decisions or who's telling the truth. He said he's not my attny and cannot address that.
So, I will get an attny assigned for the show-cause. I'll ask him/her. It might not get anywhere because that person will only be involved for the one court order I broke. Plus, a court appointment attny might never doubt the word of a PO. The GAL said that the psychiatric evaluation could have revealed "what's really going on at the root of the problem but mom refused it" and it was too bad. Obviously, they are trying to make me feel like difficult child being committed to state juvy is all because of that refusal. I will never buy that. (Keep in mind- what was going to be given was a written personality test to see where I deeviate from the norm- no personal history or interview/oral assessment.) Sending him home with a court orders for me was not the right answer for this. Plus, they already had those opinions of me, anything that might have showed up on that test would have made that worse and could have gotten difficult child into dss if they had some diagnosis that made me look horrible. Plus, if it had come back not showing anything major, it would have made difficult child look worse. I have no idea why the GAL felt it was better for difficult child to be committed to state juvy than to allow me to place difficult child into Residential Treatment Center (RTC).
It is so hard for me to believe that she really believes that. She told me herself that she had tried to talk to PO and that PO was a person who just didn't believe in mental health issues. She also told me on the phone just this past Friday that she agreed that Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was the best and most appropriate place for difficult child. So why go in there and portray it like I might not cooperate and pull difficult child from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? And say that I wouldn't deal with my own issues? It sounded like she was speaking for the PO.
The judge said regardless of the issues between PO and me, difficult child was on suspended sentence and if he couldn't go to local program then he was committed to the state. She said she had to protect the public.
Supposedly, they are doing a mental health evaluation on difficult child today to see if he should be tdo'd. It seems like another situation where someone- the PO- waited until right before court to submit something to shake things up and no one had time to look into the truth of things first.
Am I off-base in thinking the PO wanted difficult child committed to state to get back at me? Any ideas why gal would go along with this? Was she just putting on a he11 of an act when she talked to me on Friday?
Ok- I have known all along that PO has always thought all difficult child's problems were just me. Look at the parental choices she told me to make- that therapist/psychiatrist disagreed with and supported my decisions about. Why didn't the GAL look into this stuff before today? She knew this conflict existed.
Sorry this is so long.
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