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Concerned about difficult child coming home
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 340445" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Thanks, Ladies! We have just started covering terms of priviledgs, TL- we are doing it thru letters because we communicate better that way when it comes to sensitive issues but we do need to step it up and get further with it. He will be on house arrest for the first 30 days so that takes care of the initial transition and gives me a little time to see how he might adjust. One problem that I learned the hard way while he was on probation, is that when they are on parole or probation, they are really still under the control of the legal authorites and I have NO rights to place him anywhere- they are the ones to make that decision, unless I just turn him over to DSS. I have no place to send him tho because I don't consider any of my extended family appropriate so it makes no difference. So the issue is getting the parole officer on the same page - if difficult child breaks a law he automatically gets reincarcerated. But if he is not obeying house rules and leaving without my permission for example, the PO could put him on house arrest or he could ignore it- it just depends on him.</p><p></p><p>ML- I'm with you on 12-step programs. And if a person needs individual therapy in addition for a while, I'm a firm believer that it needs to be with a therapist who is on the same page of 12 step programs and not one who tries to force their own methods.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 340445, member: 3699"] Thanks, Ladies! We have just started covering terms of priviledgs, TL- we are doing it thru letters because we communicate better that way when it comes to sensitive issues but we do need to step it up and get further with it. He will be on house arrest for the first 30 days so that takes care of the initial transition and gives me a little time to see how he might adjust. One problem that I learned the hard way while he was on probation, is that when they are on parole or probation, they are really still under the control of the legal authorites and I have NO rights to place him anywhere- they are the ones to make that decision, unless I just turn him over to DSS. I have no place to send him tho because I don't consider any of my extended family appropriate so it makes no difference. So the issue is getting the parole officer on the same page - if difficult child breaks a law he automatically gets reincarcerated. But if he is not obeying house rules and leaving without my permission for example, the PO could put him on house arrest or he could ignore it- it just depends on him. ML- I'm with you on 12-step programs. And if a person needs individual therapy in addition for a while, I'm a firm believer that it needs to be with a therapist who is on the same page of 12 step programs and not one who tries to force their own methods. [/QUOTE]
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