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daughter worse than ever....update
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 208927" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Bran,</p><p> </p><p>It really is important to get help for you and your son. BOTH of you need to see therapists. Your son esp because he thinks you know whatever it is she is doing to him. He doesn't want to upset you more, so he won't tell you. YOU need to think about medication to help with the way you are feeling. Many of us have had to take medication at times, or even all the time to deal with the stress of life with a difficult child.</p><p> </p><p>As for your daughter, go back and read the suggestions we have made in your prior posts. There were a lot of good ways to handle this. Also search the site for info on detachment. Just put that word in the search box and you will get some great info. Once you do that (detach) it REALLY lowers your stress AND confuses your child. </p><p> </p><p>As your daughter problem has a key to the current locks on the house, CHANGE THEM. Then lock them at 10 pm. </p><p> </p><p>I know in your state you are not allowed to kick your daughter out at 18, but you CAN make rules and enforce them that she won't like and she can leave on her own. Just write down the rules, (be home by 10, doors locked then; no friends allowed in the house; no allowance or $$ given to her for anything; wash own clothes using machines between 10 pm and 4 am; any clothes/items left on floor of any room but her own will be thrown away; no cursing; no abusing her little brother (parents decide what abuse is; then anything else you can think of.)</p><p> </p><p>She will hate the rules and move out on her own. This will hurt your heart as she may break off contact with you, but it will be good for your son and actually for HER in the long run. </p><p> </p><p>Sorry things are so bad.</p><p> </p><p>Susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 208927, member: 1233"] Bran, It really is important to get help for you and your son. BOTH of you need to see therapists. Your son esp because he thinks you know whatever it is she is doing to him. He doesn't want to upset you more, so he won't tell you. YOU need to think about medication to help with the way you are feeling. Many of us have had to take medication at times, or even all the time to deal with the stress of life with a difficult child. As for your daughter, go back and read the suggestions we have made in your prior posts. There were a lot of good ways to handle this. Also search the site for info on detachment. Just put that word in the search box and you will get some great info. Once you do that (detach) it REALLY lowers your stress AND confuses your child. As your daughter problem has a key to the current locks on the house, CHANGE THEM. Then lock them at 10 pm. I know in your state you are not allowed to kick your daughter out at 18, but you CAN make rules and enforce them that she won't like and she can leave on her own. Just write down the rules, (be home by 10, doors locked then; no friends allowed in the house; no allowance or $$ given to her for anything; wash own clothes using machines between 10 pm and 4 am; any clothes/items left on floor of any room but her own will be thrown away; no cursing; no abusing her little brother (parents decide what abuse is; then anything else you can think of.) She will hate the rules and move out on her own. This will hurt your heart as she may break off contact with you, but it will be good for your son and actually for HER in the long run. Sorry things are so bad. Susie [/QUOTE]
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