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Demanding little difficult child!
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 149105" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>How do you handle those moments?</p><p> </p><p>He hasn't told teachers what to do, however, he did refuse another request this week (2X in one month). The kids were arguing about difficult child proclaiming to be King of the Chocolate Bar sales (and he was, selling 6 boxes to everyone else's 2 - 3). He was proud of that and when he shared his happiness to the class, they shut him down with, "Stop bragging". One girl came to ask me to make him stop. I told her he wants to let them know that he is able to do things. I went with her and in front of her told him, "O.K. you may tell everyone one time how you feel. They heard you and if they choose to be mean about it then you need to walk away." Not exactly what the girl thought I would say. I talked to the teacher about it before class so she was prepared for the class. She asked the boys if they were done with that conversation, "Yes, yes, yes, I am not answering until E answers" Guess who gave the last answer? "I am asking the boys first." "I am not answering until E answers." I talked to the teacher after school and let her know that I would talk to him about that. I also discussed with the teacher that I thought about it all day and wished I answered the kids differently. I told her that when someone tells you something good about themselves, wouldn't a friend be supportive and say "Good for you" instead of telling you to stop bragging? The day would have gone better if that had been the case. The teacher agreed and I asked that if she had a chance some time to talk to the kids about how to properly respond to "bragging". I think friends should be able to share good news with each other and those friends should respond in a supportive way. I then talked to difficult child and told him he needed to end the conversation and say "Yes" to the teacher and then if E brought it up again he could take it to teacher, "You asked us to end this and E won't drop the subject."</p><p> </p><p>I am looking for ideas on what to do during the demanding moments. And what can I suggest to the teachers to do for these refusals to follow a directive? I think they need to let him know that they do understand how he is feeling but he still has to obey orders. We are finding it takes longer for him to understand all view points and why teachers are asking him for certain things. At the moment he is so stubborn and angry but in a few hours after calming down, we can talk and explain to him why the teacher asked that of him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 149105, member: 5096"] How do you handle those moments? He hasn't told teachers what to do, however, he did refuse another request this week (2X in one month). The kids were arguing about difficult child proclaiming to be King of the Chocolate Bar sales (and he was, selling 6 boxes to everyone else's 2 - 3). He was proud of that and when he shared his happiness to the class, they shut him down with, "Stop bragging". One girl came to ask me to make him stop. I told her he wants to let them know that he is able to do things. I went with her and in front of her told him, "O.K. you may tell everyone one time how you feel. They heard you and if they choose to be mean about it then you need to walk away." Not exactly what the girl thought I would say. I talked to the teacher about it before class so she was prepared for the class. She asked the boys if they were done with that conversation, "Yes, yes, yes, I am not answering until E answers" Guess who gave the last answer? "I am asking the boys first." "I am not answering until E answers." I talked to the teacher after school and let her know that I would talk to him about that. I also discussed with the teacher that I thought about it all day and wished I answered the kids differently. I told her that when someone tells you something good about themselves, wouldn't a friend be supportive and say "Good for you" instead of telling you to stop bragging? The day would have gone better if that had been the case. The teacher agreed and I asked that if she had a chance some time to talk to the kids about how to properly respond to "bragging". I think friends should be able to share good news with each other and those friends should respond in a supportive way. I then talked to difficult child and told him he needed to end the conversation and say "Yes" to the teacher and then if E brought it up again he could take it to teacher, "You asked us to end this and E won't drop the subject." I am looking for ideas on what to do during the demanding moments. And what can I suggest to the teachers to do for these refusals to follow a directive? I think they need to let him know that they do understand how he is feeling but he still has to obey orders. We are finding it takes longer for him to understand all view points and why teachers are asking him for certain things. At the moment he is so stubborn and angry but in a few hours after calming down, we can talk and explain to him why the teacher asked that of him. [/QUOTE]
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