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Derailing dysfunctional patterns
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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 330298" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>Thanks for all of you insightful wisdom. It truly is strengthening.</p><p></p><p>I woke up this morning, knowing that one of the only reasons that I continue to seek this relationship out is that I want him to heal me. He doesn't think I am beautiful, or think I am attractive - but in my warped little mind I believe that if I could convince him I am - than I would be the most beautiful person ever. He would heal the ex who said I wasn't etc. Maybe if every time I want to go over there I tell myself that I am beautiful, talented, smart, etc - then that will stop the negative cycle in it's tracks - like I am calling it's bluff if that makes sense.</p><p></p><p>The other phrase that comes to mind is</p><p>~ crazy is doing the same thing over and over with the same results.</p><p></p><p>Mattsmum thank you for such articulate sage advice - you are an inspiration.</p><p></p><p>I just got off the phone with my other guy friend. Who truly is just a friend, but 29 and stupid. Somehow it has gone from a possible romantic fling between the 2 of us, to me being his older sister kind of friend. My feelings are not hurt about this, I guess because he has not messed with my head like the other guy. We have been up front. </p><p></p><p>Anyway this guy was telling me yesterday how the love of his life and him met in Boston for a romantic getaway and how much he loved her, yadayada. This ~ after he spends a month obsessing about how he might have gotten another girl pregnant. Well today we were supposed to go hiking and he calls to say he is hung over and can't. Then he tells he slept with yet another girl last night.</p><p></p><p>I got off the phone, and I started laughing so hard I was crying. I couldn't actually tell if I was crying or laughing at the stupidity of these men in my life. I mean, how truly shallow, vapid, and ridiculous can a man be? And how stupid is it that the only 2 friends I have are these 2 horses rears. It is almost comical, yet not. I mean why would I really care what this guy does in his free time - except he exploits and uses women - which on behalf of all women in this world I cannot tolerate.</p><p></p><p>Like you said Daisy, it is better to be alone than deal with nonsense. I guess I just need to get so busy it doesn't matter.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 330298, member: 3301"] Thanks for all of you insightful wisdom. It truly is strengthening. I woke up this morning, knowing that one of the only reasons that I continue to seek this relationship out is that I want him to heal me. He doesn't think I am beautiful, or think I am attractive - but in my warped little mind I believe that if I could convince him I am - than I would be the most beautiful person ever. He would heal the ex who said I wasn't etc. Maybe if every time I want to go over there I tell myself that I am beautiful, talented, smart, etc - then that will stop the negative cycle in it's tracks - like I am calling it's bluff if that makes sense. The other phrase that comes to mind is ~ crazy is doing the same thing over and over with the same results. Mattsmum thank you for such articulate sage advice - you are an inspiration. I just got off the phone with my other guy friend. Who truly is just a friend, but 29 and stupid. Somehow it has gone from a possible romantic fling between the 2 of us, to me being his older sister kind of friend. My feelings are not hurt about this, I guess because he has not messed with my head like the other guy. We have been up front. Anyway this guy was telling me yesterday how the love of his life and him met in Boston for a romantic getaway and how much he loved her, yadayada. This ~ after he spends a month obsessing about how he might have gotten another girl pregnant. Well today we were supposed to go hiking and he calls to say he is hung over and can't. Then he tells he slept with yet another girl last night. I got off the phone, and I started laughing so hard I was crying. I couldn't actually tell if I was crying or laughing at the stupidity of these men in my life. I mean, how truly shallow, vapid, and ridiculous can a man be? And how stupid is it that the only 2 friends I have are these 2 horses rears. It is almost comical, yet not. I mean why would I really care what this guy does in his free time - except he exploits and uses women - which on behalf of all women in this world I cannot tolerate. Like you said Daisy, it is better to be alone than deal with nonsense. I guess I just need to get so busy it doesn't matter. [/QUOTE]
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