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Detachment 101 Phrases
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<blockquote data-quote="CrazyinVA" data-source="post: 473663" data-attributes="member: 1157"><p>I agree that you can't refute the claims. I really don't think there's anything you can say that will stop a difficult child in their tracks. Nothing you say is going to change their mind, or spur them to action (or inaction). But the canned responses help diffuse the situation and help you keep control instead of being pulled into the back and forth. </p><p></p><p>I really think that part of the reason they throw blame is to pull us into an argument; it gives them power/control. Have you ever noticed that the more you ignore them, the more outrageous their claims become, as they attempt to get a reaction out of you? Honestly, sometimes I've outright laughed at the accusations thrown at me. I think you just have to develop thick skin and shrug off even the most ridiculous accusations. It takes a LOT of practice, though. Lucky for me I started early with learning how to deal with ridiculous blame ... from my ex-husband <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite7" alt=":p" title="Stick Out Tongue :p" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":p" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CrazyinVA, post: 473663, member: 1157"] I agree that you can't refute the claims. I really don't think there's anything you can say that will stop a difficult child in their tracks. Nothing you say is going to change their mind, or spur them to action (or inaction). But the canned responses help diffuse the situation and help you keep control instead of being pulled into the back and forth. I really think that part of the reason they throw blame is to pull us into an argument; it gives them power/control. Have you ever noticed that the more you ignore them, the more outrageous their claims become, as they attempt to get a reaction out of you? Honestly, sometimes I've outright laughed at the accusations thrown at me. I think you just have to develop thick skin and shrug off even the most ridiculous accusations. It takes a LOT of practice, though. Lucky for me I started early with learning how to deal with ridiculous blame ... from my ex-husband :-P [/QUOTE]
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