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Substance Abuse
Didn't want it to come to this, might be asking difficult child to leave
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 646155" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Oragmi, it is unlikely he will change anytime soon. He is THAT person...a heroin addict. It isn't going to get better any time soon. It is faulty, illogical thinking to believe otherwise. He is not the person he used to disdain. He has a physical addiction to heroin, the most addictive drug there is, and that means he is ill and can't just change and won't just change.</p><p></p><p>daughter in law can make it on a small salary. If you are under the poverty line you can get a lot of help. Better she learn to live on her own, in my opinion. At least they will not be living in danger with their dad. I had live low income for three years after my divorce and I had three kids. I made it. You need to get assistance, food stamps, job counseling, and any benefit allowed, but it can be done. My kids ate and got clothing from others or at thrift stores and nobody even knew where they bought them at.</p><p></p><p> DILneeds to grow up too or your grand children have two children as parents and you two. That will not bode will for them in the future as their immediate role models are not acting like adults so they have poor examples and could end up on your couch with two kids also, in your very elderly years, if you allow it.</p><p></p><p>Who cares if drug addicts think of you as the "bad guys?" My daughter yelled and swore when I threw her out and told me she would never speak to me again. Hello! She quit and we are very close and her baby is getting great care from her mother and her mother's SO. They all think we are bad guys unless we give them money, lodgings for free, a car, plant them a money tree and let them get high while living with us if they want to. They are selfish and unable to move on. Drug addiction is horrible, but only the addicted person can change his life.</p><p></p><p>What if Brother decides to introduce Seventeen to heroin? I wouldn't want them in contact. It is common for one sibling to introduce another to his drug of choice. And seventeen is a bit of a rebel and may agree "just once." Well, we all know how just once goes with heroin.</p><p></p><p>"Never trust a drug addict. They lie. A lot." From my daughter, former drug addict.</p><p></p><p>I hope you do see that your son is a bad influence on everyone right now. Perhaps he will be the minority who are heroin addicts and clean it up. Then YOU can change toward him. Nothing says we have to be hard on them forever. I am very giving to my daughter now, often give her stuff and buy tons and tons of things for my granddaughter, who is so beloved and doesn't need it, but I just WANT to do it because I am so proud of my daughter and so in love with my granddaughter. But she got nothing when she was killing herself. She WAS killing herself. Your son is killing himself too. Heroin kills. A lot. I hope he doesn't OD it in front of his children. They will never forget it.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your poor hurting mommy heart. I do get it and I feel so badly for you. But I feel it is more serious than you are letting yourself believe. And that can be a disaster for everyone in your family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 646155, member: 1550"] Oragmi, it is unlikely he will change anytime soon. He is THAT person...a heroin addict. It isn't going to get better any time soon. It is faulty, illogical thinking to believe otherwise. He is not the person he used to disdain. He has a physical addiction to heroin, the most addictive drug there is, and that means he is ill and can't just change and won't just change. daughter in law can make it on a small salary. If you are under the poverty line you can get a lot of help. Better she learn to live on her own, in my opinion. At least they will not be living in danger with their dad. I had live low income for three years after my divorce and I had three kids. I made it. You need to get assistance, food stamps, job counseling, and any benefit allowed, but it can be done. My kids ate and got clothing from others or at thrift stores and nobody even knew where they bought them at. DILneeds to grow up too or your grand children have two children as parents and you two. That will not bode will for them in the future as their immediate role models are not acting like adults so they have poor examples and could end up on your couch with two kids also, in your very elderly years, if you allow it. Who cares if drug addicts think of you as the "bad guys?" My daughter yelled and swore when I threw her out and told me she would never speak to me again. Hello! She quit and we are very close and her baby is getting great care from her mother and her mother's SO. They all think we are bad guys unless we give them money, lodgings for free, a car, plant them a money tree and let them get high while living with us if they want to. They are selfish and unable to move on. Drug addiction is horrible, but only the addicted person can change his life. What if Brother decides to introduce Seventeen to heroin? I wouldn't want them in contact. It is common for one sibling to introduce another to his drug of choice. And seventeen is a bit of a rebel and may agree "just once." Well, we all know how just once goes with heroin. "Never trust a drug addict. They lie. A lot." From my daughter, former drug addict. I hope you do see that your son is a bad influence on everyone right now. Perhaps he will be the minority who are heroin addicts and clean it up. Then YOU can change toward him. Nothing says we have to be hard on them forever. I am very giving to my daughter now, often give her stuff and buy tons and tons of things for my granddaughter, who is so beloved and doesn't need it, but I just WANT to do it because I am so proud of my daughter and so in love with my granddaughter. But she got nothing when she was killing herself. She WAS killing herself. Your son is killing himself too. Heroin kills. A lot. I hope he doesn't OD it in front of his children. They will never forget it. Hugs for your poor hurting mommy heart. I do get it and I feel so badly for you. But I feel it is more serious than you are letting yourself believe. And that can be a disaster for everyone in your family. [/QUOTE]
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