difficult child got into trouble at school today

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by slsh, Oct 27, 2011.

  1. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Just had to share this with you guys, especially the folks who were here a decade ago when "trouble" usually involved projectile objects/furniture and a lot of colorful language on his part.

    He apparently was talking with- some pals earlier this week about one of his teachers, using from what I gather less than complementary terms. She, of course, ended up being in the vicinity and difficult child thought she overheard what he was saying. So.... he wrote one of the most articulate e-mails I have ever read in my life to her, explaining what his issues are with her teaching style, but also voicing appreciation for her class (and putting something in there about the fact that one of the reasons he was able to appropriately address his issues with her was *because* of her class, LOL).

    She apparently was threatened by the e-mail and took it to a superior, who by all reports promptly burst into laughter and told the teacher it was one of the most well-written pieces of "hate mail" that she had ever seen and that they need to keep difficult child in class.

    So I guess there was some kind of pow-wow after class between difficult child, the teacher, and another teacher, with the e-mailed teacher expressing her unhappiness with- the e-mail and difficult child's opinion of her teaching style, eventually resorting to the old standby of "I *am* the teacher." difficult child, remarkably, had already made the decision to stick it out in her class (it's a requirement for a class he really loves) though he's well aware that in all likelihood he's not going to pass.

    He comes home, tells me he got in trouble (Mom's stomach drops to toes), shows me the e-mail, and explains the whole thing. All I can say is... WOW! What a difference a decade makes. None of his criticisms were personal. It was very well thought out, with good examples, very respectful (I have no clue what the woman was threatened by) and quite frankly... I'm just amazed.

    The capper of the whole thing was that apparently she had *not*overheard his comments, just his volume. :hammer:

    This college thing has been challenging for him. He's struggled with- authority figures for... ever? He gets so frustrated when he doesn't get straight A's, completely discounts the fact that he hasn't been in a real class for at least 10 years and that the fact that he's still hanging in counts for a *lot*. I'm just so proud of him for hanging tight - and also for so eloquently and appropriately communicating with- his teacher, even if she didn't appreciate it.
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    :bravo: difficult child! Sheesh some teachers can be so sensitive - can't take constructive criticism.
  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I'm proud of him, too! This is a life skill that is more important than any individual class and although I wasn't on the board 10 years ago, I get the jest of your struggles and can sense that he's come a long way. That teacher is just green so ...well, so be it. Just the fact that he sees even if he fails this class, it's not the end of the world and not going to stop him pursuing his goals is huge- shoot, that's huge for a easy child!
  4. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Funny, kiesta- but soooo true!
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    LOL...I so appreciate this. I can just imagine how you felt when he said that though.
  6. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Love this!! I'll take that kind of trouble any day:)
  7. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Your title of the message made me do a double take---- at first I was worried,,,

    So proud of him---I couldn't be happier that he is doing so well:)
  8. pepperidge

    pepperidge New Member

    He absolutely should not fail the class because of that. Take it to the principal.
  9. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Pepperidge - he's in college, so ... it's not something I would interfere in. He's struggling with- giving presentations in the class as well - does the work fine, but apparently freezes like a deer in headlights when he has to stand up before the class. He's very frustrated by that but, again, is not going to drop the class so I think on the whole it's been a good class for him - he's learned far more than what was on the syllabus.
  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Aren't you glad you didn't have to attend a FBA/IEP meeting?? LOL!

    As far as presentations- I had a horrible thing with that and occasionally still struggle with it although it's a lot better after a speech class in college- a class on giving speeches, not working on individual speech. Have you given him the pointers like visualizing people in their underwear, not looking anyone directly in the eyem etc? And if he'll practice in front of family/friends a few times prior to getting up in front of the class or strangers, it might help. Otherwise, I hear they have good medications for this but never tried them.
  11. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Gosh, I missed something for sure! I did not even know he was in college! I first have to get over my pure joy to hear that and then to hear that he is worried about his grades and getting into trouble with a teacher.......am I still on planet earth?

    Way To Go difficult child!!! So thrilled for you!!!!

    And for you and husband, too, Slsh!
  12. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Can he do his in-class presentations as a multi-media exhibit?
    That way, he pre-does all the speaking etc., has a whole slide show and whatever else... and all he has to do is run the computer and answer questions afterwards...

    Its an accommodation that has been offered to my difficult child at the HS level...
  13. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Ditto, your son inspires me!