difficult child priority skewed

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by StressedM0mma, Dec 15, 2011.

  1. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    Sometimes I just have to shake my head in confusion at my difficult child. She has a group project that is due, and she has not finished her part. (of course) So, she decided on her own to set her alarm for 5:30 to work on it. When I got up at 5:45 to start my day, I go into her room to see if things are going ok, and what is she doing? Putting on her makeup and fussing with her face. REALLY?? I just decided to get ready first. UH? How about you do the project first and then with whatever time you have left you get ready?

    See, I do not know about the rest of you, but my difficult child will use all of the time +5 more minutes just to get ready. No matter if it is 20 minutes or an hour and a half. So, it will be time to go, and she will not have done any of the work. And it is stressing me out beyond belief to just sit down here and say nothing. Oh calgon take me away.
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    easy child/difficult child is so like that!
  3. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    difficult child does that every morning and it drives me crazy. And yes, it is hard not to say something.
  4. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    OMG - I deal with the same thing almost every day. The worst is when she sets the alarm and then can't even wake up when it goes off. husband and I get woke up and we are across the hall. Little sis gets woke up from her 30 sleep... but not difficult child. She sleeps right thru it.

    OR... she asks us to get her up 30 minutes early - so I skip my morning shower so she can have the bathroom... and then she gets up and goes in to the bathroom - and when I go back 30 minutes later to wake up little sis - she is back in bed sleeping!! THen she wakes up as grumpy as a bear and little sis and I get the brunt of her irritation. KSM
  5. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    I just had to sit and laugh a little at it. She is still working. Says she will be ready at 9. Any guess as to what time it will be really?
  6. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    So, what time was she really ready?
  7. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    We made it to school by 9:12!! I could not believe it. It must have been my Christmas miracle.LOL!! I think she had that time in mind the entire time. On the way to school she says "Classes change at 9:11, and I don't have to go to my 2 classes that I don't have any friends in"--hmmm? could that be any reason we are late to school alot?
  8. ready2run

    ready2run New Member

    wow...2 classes befor 9? what the heck time is school on there? school here starts at 9. and my difficult child still gets up at 5:30 or earlier every single day.
  9. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    Class starts at 7:20 in the morning for the H.S. Of course the Elementary school doesn't start until 8:15. We have tried for years to get them to switch the 2 but of course they won't.
  10. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Did I hear you right? 7:20 in the morning?
    High school? for everybody?

    Haven't they seen all the studies on teens and circadian (sp?) rhythms and such?

    I'm in dinosaur country... and even here, HS starts at about 9:00 (some schools, its 8:50 or 8:55... )
    The only way somebody is AT school at 7:20 is if the have a "period zero" class... usually, electives that cross grades, such choir... or an early team practice. So... only the certified keeners are there for period zero.

    7:20? I'd have quit school in grade 9, over a 7:20 start. SERIOUSLY. And I got out of there with honors, and ended up with a degree and... but 7:20? sorry. I need my sleep. (back then... don't ask for my schedule now!)

    She needs an IEP exemption from at LEAST first period.
  11. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    I know. My easy child daughter gets up at 5:15 every morning to shower and get ready. She drives them to school, and they have to leave the house by 7 at the latest so they are not stuck in school traffic and can get to the parking lot and into school on time. (The middle school is on the same campus, and the parents dropping off take the same route as the H.S.ers. Time to try and wake difficult child for the morning. Wish me luck. She said she is going on time today. we shall see.
  12. ready2run

    ready2run New Member

    i would ask for an exemption as well. actually i would probably tell the school 'it's not happening' and not even let them have a choice but that's just me. i also took the stand on homework as in, i don't do homework. i don't fight about homework. i don't review homework. i have enough problems without homework. i will occasionally help out with a project or a big assignment if the teacher asks me directly and respectfully. i also don't do 5 am wake ups. lol....i'm sorry you have to deal with that. i wouldn't be able to. i need my sleep and i hate morning.
  13. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oooh, she sounds like my 83-yr-old cousin, who on Monday changed her clothes 3X because she didn't like her outfit, and made us late for her neurology appointment. They refused to see us.
    She has always been like this and will never change.
    But your daughter is younger and has you as an influence. Don't give up!
  14. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    There is no way a child of mine would be at school if I had to get them up to be there by 7:20. About 7 or 8 yrs ago my husband, children and mother (we lived with my parents at the time) sat me down and BEGGED me to stop getting up to get the kids off to school. I don't function well in the am and I try hard not to grump but I wasn't very successful. It is easier in the am now that I have had the hysterectomy, but I am just NOT a morning person. I do the late at night stuff and they do the am stuff. We are all better off for it.

    I am sorry that morning is so hard.
  15. buddy

    buddy New Member

    our schools all do it backward too.... highschool goes first, then middle school then elementary schools start between 8:30 and 9, since there are more of those they rotate who does the early start and late for bussing. working at the charter school was good, they all come at 9.
  16. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Ours does it backwards as well..HS starts the earliest. I think their thinking is HS'ers have jobs after school. Plus more homework. Mine had to get up and out to the bus by 6:30 or so maybe 6:45. School was over at 2:30 or so I think.
  17. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    Our HS starts at 8:05 and the middle school at 8:07. They are on the same campus so the traffic is horriifc especially as many parents drive their kids because it's on the way to the railroad station parking lot. When we bought 15 years ago, I insisted that we live within walking distance of that campus and it was the right choice. My kids can walk although I admit to driving my D for 3 years because she had to be there at 7:30 for choir. When we bought, my kids were in elementary school and I drove to work the opposite way. Now I go to the railroad but H drives me because you can't get a spot after 7:15 and it costs a lot to park. Sometimes, we drop easy child or youngest boy off. difficult child has walked almost every day since D graduated. If easy child is ready they walk together, otherwise not. difficult child will not wait for easy child - he is usually out by 7:15 for a 5 block walk even when he has first period off.

    As for the group projects, I hate them because I was always the kid who did all the work. difficult child has done them over the years and he participates because he doesn't like to look bad. I think they should be outlawed except in those classes where collaborative learning is career training (e.g, engineering type classes because engineers work together in teams).

    Our elementary schools all used to start at 8:30. This year, to reduce bus costs, the school district changed to a staggered start between 8:20 and 8:45.