difficult child update

[Nancy]

DDD my easy child posted that prayer on my fb wall today and I have been saying it all day.

Update--husband finally got a text from difficult child saying that this jerk punched her in the stomach last night and she left today and went to this other guys house and hasn't had a shower in three days. She hates me and wants to come home if I'm not here??????

Nancy

 

[katya02]

I'm so sorry ... adding my hugs and support. I wonder - would the text from difficult child about having been assaulted be enough to have that jerk arrested for domestic assault?

 

[Fran]

Nancy, I'm so sorry. It makes me want to be sick. I'm sure you are beside yourself.
All you can do is hope her survival instinct kicks in.
Stupidity is telling the owner of a home that if she leaves, deadbeat daughter will come back. It's sad but laughable.

 

[Ephchap]

Nancy, just shaking my head reading this. I can't imagine how upset you are.
Sending mega hugs,
Deb

 

[Nomad]

I am so sorry. I wish you were nearby so I could give you an actual real time/real life hug.
This is heart-breaking...even sickening.
I would seriously consider calling the police to find out if legal action could be taken...and consider double checking that she is on birth control...might even provide her with condoms.
Most importantly....how is your health? Have you had a check up recently? If you are not doing so, I would consider seeing a therapist. This is just way over the top and no doubt you could really use the support.
Consider avoiding or at least limiting finding out/taking in so much information. I think you know chances are very high it is going to be negative anyway.
All you can do is offer your daughter some guidance, perhaps opportunity for therapy...but you can not control her. You can however, control your own thoughts and actions.
Sending prayers...and hugs 100X

 

[Bean]

She hates me and wants to come home if I'm not here??????

Nancy

Have you let her do this before? Do you think she just doesn't want to face you (shame, whatever)? Or do you think she'd steal from you?

Gosh it is amazing what some of these difficult child will put themselves through.

Nancy, I'm so sorry.

 

[Nancy]

She has no shame Bean. She meant she wanted me gone so she could come home and do whatever she wanted in the comfort of her own home.

Nancy

 

[witzend]

And yes I have to keep myself calm so no "accidents" happen.Nancy

See if in a quiet moment you can't get her to agree to some sort of passive birth control, like progesterone or the implant. These guys know that a "baby mama" is easier to control.

As to the harassment charge - he's probably right. In this state if you tell someone to not phone you again and they do, it's grounds for a harassment charge. Then again, I'd be all kinds of ready for that. Let him charge you with harassment. I'd outright tell him to "go ahead". I'd be happy to show the police why you were talking to him about your daughter. The little piece of ....

 

[Kathy813]

Nancy,

I just saw this . . . I am so, so sorry.

On a nicer topic, I just noticed in your signature that your easy child has a teaching job. Did she get a job in the town where you live? My easy child is student teaching this year. I am hoping that she has a job this time next year!

~Kathy

 

[Nancy]

witz, my husband had had clients charge with telephone harrassment for just that and so we know if he tells us not to call and we do we can be charged. Actaully I don;t care because I will do whatever it takes to protect my daughter and hope the jury understands. But for now he isn;t worth my trouble.

Nancy

 

[Nancy]

Kathy, she got a first grade teaching job in a charter school in the city. It's actually not far from where I grew up and where my dad still lives. The area had had tough ties and it's not the safest place to be alone after dark, but it's not terrible either. The building is nice and I was there helping her set up her room yesterday and I'm sure she will do very well there. The pay scale is much lower than the public schools and there aren't that many benefits but she does get health insurance at a much reduced rate so that's a biggie.

Teaching jobs are very hard to come by here so she is very fortunate. I hope your easy child is able to find a job after her student teaching too.

Nancy

 

[Jody]

I am so so sorry, I will be praying for you and your family. Many big hugs.